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Mon, Jun 30, 2025

10:45pm EDT

Members: 764

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Le Voyage Magnifique

by Dave

Rated: 18+ · Book · Writing · #1236257

A log of the magnificent journey across the vast sea of my imagination.

A sig awarded for winning "The Anything Goes Poetry Contest"

A log of our magnificent journey.

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Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

Soldier_Mike

Apr 18, 2025 at 11:44pm
In response to "Military "Brat""

All four of my daughters were vets from the moment of birth. They were all born while I was on Active Duty, were born in Army hospitals, and bounced back and forth between the U.S. and West Germany with their mom and me (the eldest ones more than once).

1 Like

Dave

Sep 18, 2024 at 2:09pm
In response to "The Call"

Yes, a blending of recent newscasts inspired this one.

Kåre เลียม Enga

Sep 17, 2024 at 2:22pm
In response to "The Call"

Ouch. Too real for me today. I was homeless years ago and Montana has a high vet population struggling with personal issues. This literally could be today's headlines here.

1 Like

AnotherDreamer

Aug 26, 2024 at 3:19pm
In response to "Smorgasbord"

Thank you for reminding me. I can almost taste the salt in the air from here

1 Like

StephBee

Jun 4, 2024 at 6:51pm
In response to "Military Mom"

My comment is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

The poem is a nice tribute to a military mother.

WHAT I LIKED

I can totally relate to this poem having served in the military myself. There are often times one worries and finds things to pass the time, but their loved one is never far from their hearts.

STRUCTURE

This is a villanelle. A villanelle is a highly structured poem with 5 tercets and ends with a quatrain. There are 2 repeating rythmes and 2 repeating refrains. The poem followed the structure. I thought the repeating refrains were very respectful and reverent. There's a nice rythme and flow when spoken outloud.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML to increase font and make easier to read on the website.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: With steadfast devotion, she prays to relieve the anxiety" The description draws up a visual of a mother, prayerful, with a holy book, or a passage, heart on their sleeve, looking to find peace. It's a great description and taps into somber emotion well.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The opening engages the reader. The title is a nice fit for the poem. Good luck in the Bard's Hall Contest.

[Visit the entry for more...]

StephBee

Dec 7, 2023 at 9:47pm
In response to "Thanksgiving Restoration"

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM

Inspired by a quote from Henry van Dyke, the progresses from feeling, to expression to action inspired by a thanksgiving gathering.

WHAT I LIKED

I like how each stanza started with "I'm thankful for..." The repetition was as soothing as the sentiments expressed.

STRUCTURE

As per the notes, this is loosely based on a monchielle styled poem.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any punctuation mistakes. The poem is easy to read.

DESCRIPTIONS

I liked: "the smell of Grammy's turkey dressing,"

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

The poem progresses much like van Dyke's quote, from feeling to expression to action/being in the moment of a thanksgiving gathering.

[Visit the entry for more...]

Kåre เลียม Enga

Oct 30, 2023 at 1:36am
In response to "A Halloween Celebration"

Nice rhythm and alliteration! The rhymes work as well. Edit and versify and voila... you have a free-verse poem (or a prose poem) for Shadows & Light.

My dreamy brain... ghoulish? dark? My nightmares are definitely disturbing and don't always dissipate with daylight.

Needless to say, I like it.

Kåre เลียม Enga

May 19, 2023 at 9:25am
In response to "Poppies"

I do like it. The rhythm is nice. I appreciate bravery/Normandy/memory.

"because" doesn't work for me. No suggestions though.

1 Like

StephBee

Jan 5, 2023 at 5:40pm
In response to "SILENT NIGHT"

My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

THE POEM
A poem about the nature of the Christmas season.

WHAT I LIKED

I liked how the acrostic of "silent night" painted the beauty of winter.

STRUCTURE

This is an acrostic poem. It is where the first letter of the line spell out a word or a phrase.

MECHANICS

I did not spot any spelling/punctuation mistakes. Good use of WDC ML to make the poem easy to read. Good use of WDC ML.

PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

I have no other suggestions. Nice word play. You can feel the weather nipping at your cheeks. Good luck in the Bard's Hall Contest.

Reviewed by StephB for the Bard's Hall

** Animated Images For Use By Premium+ Only **

Dave

Jan 3, 2023 at 8:32am
In response to "The Gravel Path"

I am glad you posted this on the forum so everyone else can enjoy it.

1 Like

June 28, 2025 at 4:40pm

#1092429

Our Winnebago Vacation

The time has come to get away
from stifling urban density
and strenuous commercial fray
in our Winnebago RV.

Instead of irksome traffic blare,
we can enjoy the crickets' choir
and sensory treats beyond compare
wrapping us in marvel to inspire.

Hypnotized by fireflies that flash
all around us when sun goes down,
we join in Mother Nature's bash,
admiring her lavender gown.

Comment

June 20, 2025 at 4:50pm

#1091893

CAUTION!

Living in our culture,
where Hip Hop meets scriptue
and politicians speak in tongues
to dodge accountability
for their deceptive missions,
like hungry vultures,
we must be alert
to question specific details
beyond their crafty talking points.

Comment

June 17, 2025 at 4:03pm

#1091704

Flanders Field

On Flanders Field,
where artillery shells
churned up the dirt
and killed many soldiers,
poppy seeds began to bloom.

Along with crimson poppies,
military cemeteries appeared
to honor the sacrifices
of those who gave their lives
on that hallowed ground

Comment

May 20, 2025 at 4:23pm

#1089691

Desperate

We ain't gettin' no younger,
but still endurin' the hunger
that keeps drivin' us insane.

In spite of loneliness and pain,
the dreams of yesterday
keep tauntin' us to our dismay.

The time has come to find new dreams
and quiet all those mental screams.

Comment

May 20, 2025 at 2:45pm

#1089683

Those Pearls

Don't forget your string of pearls--
those pearls of wisdom
to guide you along
the path of life.

Be careful what you're wishing for,
because the light sometimes shines
on webs of temptation
to lead you down the wrong path.

Comment

May 15, 2025 at 3:06pm

#1089382

Tradition

The day after
high school graduatation,
he bid home sweet home farewell
and boarded a Greyhound bus
to go off and defend our nation,
enabling his family
to maintain that home sweet home,
just like his Uncle Joe had done.

Comment

April 18, 2025 at 2:25pm

#1087491

Military "Brat"

Brandon Brady became a vet
at a very early age:
a veteran of relocating,
a veteran of changing schools,
a veteran of making new friends,
a veteran of separation,
or even worse.

You see, his dad is in the Army
and is frequently transferred
from one base to another,
or deployed to overseas assignments,
so Brandon must constantly adjust
to new teachers, new coaches, new climates.

As a result of his dad's occupation,
Brandon Brady became a vet
at a very early age.

Inspiration ▼

Comment • View 1 comment

March 15, 2025 at 4:49pm

#1085470

The VFW

Down at the VFW,
hamburgers, fries, and brew
fuel our camaraderie,
while serving our community.

The recipe for success
is concocted with finesse.

Each member of our Post commits
to aid others in getting benefits
and support charity events
to help our local residents.

Our mission is to assist
wherever the needs exist
and enjoy a bowl of beef stew
down at the VFW.

14 lines

Comment

February 18, 2025 at 3:27pm

#1084047

Snot Season

'Tis the season
for bubbly snot
to drizzle down
my upper lip.

Then, the sneezes
blow gooey gobs of gunk
all over my computer screen,
so I can't read
email message
from my lover.

Comment

December 31, 2024 at 3:18pm

#1081764

Party Time!

Open graves,
ghouls a-plenty celebrate
in the night of the living dead.

Raucous raves
presently reverberate
across the neighbor's flowerbed.

Spectral knaves
continue to congregate
with attitudes quite spirited,

until waves
of sunlight terminate
that terrifying spread of dread.

12 lines

Comment

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