This poem smolders with lust and love. A flame longing to fire. :) "The course of true love
never did run smooth" (Shakespeare quote) :)
Should the word in you poem "waist" be spelled "waste." I spell things
incorrectly a lot of the time. Whats funny is I can read over what I wrote
and still it slips by me.
This story sounds as if someone has died and was taken by an Angel..the Angel having
a message. This message is to help with the continuing path in life. Did you feel the pureness of
emotion. The total experience of love and hate. It continues. What seems like a full expression
is only some of what really is. There's so much more.
I liked your story. It's Biblical to me. We are the living Bible.
Why do we do this. I mean..we think about someone all the time..but then ignore him/her.
We wait for the songs that remind us of HIM/HER..then refuse to answer that call. Some of
us even go around wearing his shirt..sniffing the pillow he laid on..hugging this same
pillow or pulling it between our legs to sleep. THEN this person comes for his/her things
and we throw it at em. What the heck. :)
This is good. :) I can relate to this. You sound like a positive person.
Where you wrote .."Maybe I crashed and burned. Maybe I am the burning
cinders." That means you're still alive..hot..ready to ignite..live again. AND
you always find a foundation..I like that..solidity. :) you are strong.
Looking for the good. :)
I would say this is the human. Always putting the I into the we. Hey what about making clones.
We have become so dependent upon technology..its something that can help US now.
That would cause confusion I'd think. Make the clones of them..then they'll being killing
the I. Just keep making the duplicates.. They can fight amongst themselves :) Yeah..there
ya go :)
Guns have their place. The soldier made this country. The survivalist can live off nature. Policemen
need them for their safety and ours. They are needed to protect us. Its the people who have no
respect or discipline for a weapon that shouldn't have one. Everyone has 3 seconds to do something
when someone is trying to takeover..trying to take ones life. I bring the the dragon out..the hawk
screeches..the turtle thinks..God speaks..the angels sings..all done in 3 seconds. :) things are turned
I surrender the gun to its proper owner.
I found your poem interesting. It reminded me of NY.
With every addicts life begins tomorrow. With every addict life brings sorrow.
It can change..but it might have to wait. Addicts need to feed now..when fed..
a promise will be given maybe forgotten. If that promise is remembered..it will have
to wait till... tomorrow. Im gonna kick..tomorrow. yeah yeah yeah
The shadowy figure waits for no one but wants everybody.
I like your poem. Ive been around addiction most my life. It can be so trying. One has
to remember that when they do get the help they need its something to keep in check.
Addiction wants its way..it will try always to win you back..it WON'T wait till tomorrow.
Turn the water off.:) Try not letting the evils in. I know everyone is approached by them
but one doesn't have to become friends. One thing fore sure..if one has to hide it in their
closet..that says it all. If not hidden then it can be dealt with. Drowning in the Sink..sounds
like a song.
Its called rationalizing. Finding reason for what was done. Why is it the blame is most always
thrown onto something or someone else. Why people use God as their reason for their sins
makes no sense. We are saved by God..he's total love and forgiveness. Evil does the tempting..
everyone having control over what one decides. Who was the guy who said "the dog told me to do it."
Maybe the dog was possessed...anything is possible. Let the light shine..radiate good..shake out
the demons by taking in the bread of life..the Bible. God's word is never short in supply.:)
I like where you wrote "thanks to the leftover courage." that's neat.
Why at the end do you call it a "fast-moving mess." When I think of
mess..it means things aren't where they ought to be. The more I think
about it..I guess it makes sense..yeah.everything happening so fast.
I get it but the word mess kinda puts a negative on it.
I like your story.
smoke signals. What I get from yours is you wanting another chance at
something. Wishing you could make it all happen again..to dance with
happiness..to twist into the fate of what could have been. It fades..until
another reminder..another dance.
I like this poem.
You didnt lose your wings. We never do. They've been tucked away.
Its up to you to spread them again. The sky exists too..sometimes we
put the blinds down. I;m so glad at the end of your poem you seem to
have rediscovered your wings :) your happiness..you found hope.I love
that. I like your poem very much
butterfly butterfly fluttering by
wings of color that match the sky
butterfly butterfly come mingle with me
many many flowers are here for thee
wont you stop and stay awhile
bringing to be a needed smile :)
This is good :) You're right..darkness/evil isn't to be taken lightly.
Its no game..its not cool..its everything one can think of that makes
them sick or hurt or want to die THEN it goes far beyond that.
Interesting where you wrote "forces us to bury innocence in the soil
of our sins." "SOIL OF OUR SINS" now thats saying a lot! I love that..
I wish I had though of that! Go with that thought and say..WHAT WE
PUT INTO THAT GROUND WILL DEFINITELY FIND GROWTH.
right? "Fear not change." I like that too. I can say I really like your
poem. You get a five from me because this poem SAYS SO MUCH
I didnt even touch upon "because its in our hearts." yes..our hearts
affect our being..mind..soul. Thank you for writing this.
You make me think a a pilot in an airplane he's not familiar with.
Also when the pilot isn't instrument rated..getting into weather
conditions where up seems down..trying to fix this..the plane
spirals. Take on the things you know..while walking your path
in life one will gain wisdom..this wisdom will guide you to unknown
territory..this giving one growth..climbing when the time is right. Try not
to rush things. One might put him or herself into a spin..spiraling.
One is more than three cause one has more to do :)three can make things easier
for most..harder for some. If one stays with another then its called a friend.
What sets one free is up to that person. We can cage a body but not the mind or soul. But
then I think of mental abuse and thats caging definitely..only if one allows it. SO
set your mind free which in turn releases your heart and soul. Then you can fly :)
just be..let the skies fall around you..they're clouds giving you a lift :)
Im thinking of a recorder..thats probably an old term but really. The days you
cant write you can say it. You know what I mean? Where you say you're suppose
to be at the prime of your life. I always thought there is no set time. "Prime" makes
me think of a piece of beef..we are not meat. Its suppose to be the best part..I think.
whatever. The BEST part=prime :) has yet to happen so think positive! The best has
yet to come. There ya go. :) I know with pain things can be so difficult. A friend of mine
has pain all the time. He has asbestos and he broke his back several times. Its
terrible but living by the day helps. It's good you express yourself in someway. Writing
is wonderful..but dont forget the recorder for those really difficult days :)
This is an awesome piece. I enjoyed it very much. You gave me things
to think about. I agree..we all have a "shadow side." I allow God to Guide
me as I hold the hand of Jesus..wondering to myself..have I failed his test.
Where you say "discover old truths."This meaning to me the things about us
that's been their all along that affect all that we do. Some can be negatives
others positive. I guess this can go under the shadow too. I think sometimes
I fall into my hollow. I find what can be...I tend to put off.. but the time is now.
Falling into the hollow..one can learn everything about themselves..it gives one
wisdom in the growth to a better self.
I can relate to this :) I wish so badly I could do it all again with my doggie.
I miss her so much..from the clicking of her nails to the constant licking and
shaking to scratching..letting me know its that time :)
I do break rules sometimes and have about 1/2 cup of ice cream with about
1 tlbsp of chopped walnuts and finely ground carob chocolate fudge that
turned out too hard and broke my sons tooth..BUT its good on ice cream.
Is that what you mean? :) I would step out of my BMW when I get one. Exercise
I know I can stick with so I guess I can delay it for an hour. My way of letting go
is singing and dancing with my doggie when she was alive. Now I do it alone.
I also go out of body..this is really adventurous! I love it.
I liked your piece. Your talking spontaneity I think. Yes..I agree its great. I love
it too :)
Did you know there are sounds we cannot hear..so I guess Id call
that sounds of silence. The sounds in ourselves.. we need to listen
clearly..some we don't hear at all..others we seem to feed upon..
ignoring the rest. Whether a negative or positive..it will find strength
in our thoughts...our actions. We have control over our lives.
Each of us can use our positives to help the growth of good inside.
I think where you say sound stirs the soul..Iagree. Music moves me.
Nature transform my soul and silence touches the spirit. I love where
you say "Angels came and sang a song" that's so true..Angels sing
beautifully. I also like what you said about the river. Water is a huge part
of our lives. Its a portion of everything. The ripples are internal that affect
the external. God guiding both. We must accept the offering...the message
given. It gives us freedom..wisdom being the key to give us strength to walk
our path. When we find peace...we find rest..then comes hope..it bringing love.
I found your piece very interesting. Thanks for sharing it.
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/2bemar/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/24
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.58 seconds at 9:17am on Jul 07, 2024 via server web1.