Welcome to WDC and a huge thank you for posting this chapter for me to read! Already I can see you are an excellent writer. This shows very clearly through the wonderful phrasing and pacing of the paragraphs. The main FMC has already shown herself to be a rather sassy and feisty young lady.
Unlike myself, you take your time and it seems, at least to me, you only post your chapters when you deem it is ready for posting!
After reading this, I thought nice to know the daily life of a fly sitting on a pipe! I wonder what flies are privy to as they sit on various man made objects in people's homes!
Still, it seemed to me that nature has created perfect eavesdroppers in the fly! Well done for such a unique poem, I enjoyed it!
To me, the treasure would be the Rain's bow. Gold is all well and good, but true beauty can be found in nature.
Just as you described, nature is beautiful in all the forms it chooses to take. Ecellent use of phrasing and the word rhymes in the sentences add to the mystical feel of the whole poem.
Thanks for such an interesting puzzle. William the Conquerer did change rather alot concerning English society back then didn't he? I've actually seen the Domesday book he ordered his staff to create. It is in the Tower of London. Thanks for reminding of that visit with this great word search.
Ooh, a poem concerning the daughter of Catherine of Aragon and Henry the VIII. One fact I can supply for you, Jane Seymour managed to reconcile Mary with her father when she was 17 years old. I did spot one error, she is the daughter of Henry VIII not VII.
But apart from that, a good poetic description of one of Englands most bloodiest of Queens.
This really made me laugh as I read through this short story. A strong barbarian, brought low by drink and a woman in a bra. I howled with laughter at that point. Another of my favourite parts was the description of the court wizard. I had expected an old man, but the picture of the warty old woman was unexpected and rather funny.
I believe this could be extended into a novel. Perhaps a smart companion for the dumb barbarian? I could read a novel like that!
Ooooh, lookie here! New stuffies for me to read and lots of it! As for psych meds, don't need them! Being sane is overated anyway! I'd rather be slightly nuts and have fun with reading your stuff. When this quirky page with all of the posts popped up in the random reviews, I had to peruse it.
I'm glad I did. Now I'm going to try and read it all! After I find most of my missing marbles, aka brains that somehow got loose!
Ahhh, so this Maddie's bio. I read an excerpt from a chapter you wrote for the 'Character Clash' tournament. You have a good, basic character bio here. I love the information you already have here. But I do have a slight suggestion, perhaps you could expand on her traits etc.
Is Maddie mechanically inclined? perhaps include her aspirations for that? Otherwise, no complaints from me!
Welcome to WDC and thanks for uploading this Steampunk chapter. I love Steampunk and when this popped up in the Random Review Rewards this grabbed my attention. Maddie seems to be a great character, not a stereotypical female character. She is gutsy, intelligent and not afraid to speak her mind. I'm interested in Doctor Plumpocket.
Is he a mentor for Maddie? Although with the large crowd at Clockwork Manor, either something nefarious happened to the good Doctor, or he blew an experiment up.
I hope you expand on this, I love reading Steampunk!
Welcome to WDC and thank you for uploading a chapter that shows potential. You've obviously gotten to grips with WritingML, a skill I'm still trying to achieve, so well done on that score.
I didn't spot any glaring errors and superfluous punctuation. I tend to overdo that sometimes. I just wanted to ask, is this a Teen/YA/Middle Grade science fiction or fantasy novel?
I know there is some type of power, whether psychic or magical involved, due to the events of the last few paragraphs at the bottom of the chapter. Perhaps the young female character is experiencing an awakening of some sort? It seems that way to me!
Anyway, well done on such a fine first upload here on WDC!
I just wanted to ask, how many types of poetry forms do you know of and write? You are obviously good at writing poetry from reading this. For some reason when I read this, thoughts of this poem being fantasy based came to mind.
Like being in an elven sanctuary, watching the crystal waters flow from the highest reaches as a translucent shimmer.
Oooh, this is a nice little educational entry I have stumbled across in your blog, especially concerning character creation and backstory. Before I joined here in 2014, I used to upload fanfiction on a couple of websites. Since joining here, I've started to learn rather a lot concerning character creation and backstory, arcs etc.
All of these add to a novel, novella or fanfiction's plot. I wonder what else I can learn if I read through the rest of your blog? As the Tenth Doctor said, 'LETS FIND OUT!'
Even though this is only a two line poem, it can be pretty thought provoking! You must have produced some prime thoughts in that creative brain of yours! I know I have, at various times of the day and at night....
I agree with what you've written about in the verses of this poem concerning retirement. Whilst people do have to retire after a long working life, he/she can still do much. Perhaps not reminiscing about the past overmuch, but perhaps teaching younger people with the benefit of their years of experience.
I've had such a benefit myself from having friends who are elderly. They've taught me that no matter how old I get, I still have time to do what I wish to do. Hearing their life stories has made me realize one fact, that we are here to teach each other. Perhaps that will make the future brighter.
Choconut, this brilliant and quite funny as well! I'd love to find the type of book Martha has managed to get her hans on, but knowing my penchant for reading, I'd cause tons of mischief with it!
It seems this particular book of magic with its rather odd incantations is more trouble than its worth!
After all what trouble can arise from reading a book? LOTS, from what Martha accidentally did to her twit of a father! Nice piece of writing here, thanks for uploading it!
I'm rather surprised this hasn't recieved any reviews yet. I'm a sucker for any fantasy stories for with female warriors, even better with a female paladin. One of the only female writers who has created female paladins with her own series of fantasy books is Elizabeth Moon.
Have you ever read Deed of Paksenarrion? This trilogy details how Paks, a farmgirl, began her journey from mercenary soldier to Paladin. I think you could do that with your short story. Perhaps tell the life-story of Jennifer? That is a tale I would love to read.
I've always wondered what cows would talk about and you've just answered that one. My favourite part was the farmyard cat having to impart to the other animals just what their fate would invariably be.
I laughed even more when the cow asked what chicken would taste like!
Yup, I've been through this myself quite recently. Because of college and having college bills coming in, I was overstretched!
But reading this article does give out a message, pick yourself up and carry on. Life does begin to get better. I've learned that. Work has given me extra hours so I can chip away at that mountain of college debt. While work gives me extra hours, I'll take it!
Besides you are correct. It takes courage to admit you've messed up! Now I feel I can begin again!
Plus carry on looking for a new job. Thanks for the lesson, I really required this.
This poem does indeed reflect spirituality through your words and phrasing you've used. The verses also show you hold a great love for the Lord. Dou you also have a great love for the sea as well?
As you've written this, it seems to me that you've viewed the path of your life the same way the oceans flow:
Both turbulent, playful, whimsical and full of calm moments.
For a movie haiku, you sure crammed rather alot in here. Let me see, Godzilla, Jurrasic Park, Spiderman and a load of other movies I'm not even aware of. Maybe the bird mentioned is from Lord of the Rings? That movie series does have giant eagles summoned by Gandalf the Grey!
I really enjoy the mix of cultures this wide and beautiful world has on it. I believe if everyone was the same, life and the world would be boring. Being human also means having diversity, as people from all races and walks of life can come together and create something beautiful, just like you have here.
A poem about the consequences of telling the entire truth. I did this at work and got myself in such trouble, I'm often tempted to shut up and just get on with my job, even if a mistake is made.
I think this teaches a lesson. Only be honest when you absolutely have to. Imparting the whole truth can get you into a whole lot of trouble! Seems the guy in the poem has put himself into the dog house for telling the truth. I'm curious, do guys always get sent to the couch for even the SLIGHTEST daft thing?
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