This is great work I cannot find enough to say about this work. It took my breath away and left me drenched in tears. I could hear this song being sung by the masses, I felt as if millions of headless horsemen where riding into the very pages and lashing at everything and everyone in sight.
Thanks for sharing and continue to write about the need to be concerned, as our children are being killed and killing.
Sincerely
Marlena Duci
What a wee sweet story! I could see the children jumping for joy at the site of their wonderful little gift. I can hardly wait until Thanksgiving when my youngest grandchildren will be arriving for dinner, and I can pull out this lovely story and read it to them. You did a wonderful job of putting the colors in just the right places and your three little characters were so very real.
I am sure children as well as adults everywhere will love this story, and personally I like the first ending better, but I think most children will love the second one better, no matter they are both good.
Thank you so much for sharing with us.
Fairy Hugs
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This little poem is very nice and very sweet.
I hope she will come to understand that you
care for her very much. I think you must tell
her! You may be surprised at how she may feel
about you.
I like what you are trying to say
in your poem, and I think you are doing very well with your english, it'll get better with practice.
Continue to write and please write some in French, there are many on this site who speak French also.
Thank you for stopping by and reading 'Mixing Worlds The Answer,' A Tribute to Women the World Over.
And welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
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I think this is so cute, and I'd love to send you a
thousand GPs, if only you'd turn those hapless I's into capital I's.
Also I’d change the rating too.
Hopefully other reviewers will match my offer, and beg you have mercy on your author peer's eyes. This is just a suggestion, and you don't have to take my advice. It's still cute.
Sincerely
Mduci
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Without a doubt this is a tender love song, and although it starts out very strong it somehow lets your reader down because it seems to be unfinished.
There are weak and strong points to every bit of poetry or prose and we need to captivate the strong points and get them across. These are just my suggestions and not meant to lessen the affect of your work.
'But thanks to you, Atlast! You found
my weary soul weeping without a sound…
You revived me with your ardent love
sincerely shown, it is for me without a doubt'
The lines above could use a little revising.
Keep writing and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
Mduci
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What a vivid painting I see before me, I can see the girl you describe and I feel the wind as it surrounds her and causes the fabric of her dress to rustle and cling to her skin. I feel the fall as her foot is sucked between the two rocks and she falls backward.
I love your writing and the realness which you bring into the life size picture. Thank you so much for sharing and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
Mduci
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I must congratulate you on becoming that wonderful father figure who will at some point I'm sure, cause her some grief; yet in time she'll come to understand that it was in her best interest. And of course there will come a time in her own life, when she will look for you in the heart, and eyes, of the man who steals her heart away from you. And of course you in time will come to understand.
It is wonderful to hear your words of love and protection, it is every young girl's dream to be; daddy's little princess, great read and so very touching.
Thank you for sharing and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
Mduci
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What sadness I felt while reading this poem of losing a part of yourself, no matter the blood
tie, when you live with someone and love that someone it can break your heart to lose them.
Very good job of writing, I would just like to know more about why she was taken away and whether or not she was ever seen again. Thank you for sharing and I look forward to visiting your port again soon.
Sincerely
Mduci
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What a wonderful tribute to Mother Nature and the elements that comes with the passing seasons.
'sweet smelling lilacs
delicate blossoms reach up
to face the warm sun'
I've enjoyed this little port raid, and look forward to my next visit. I can see your heart is so open and ready to expand your writing to great lengths. Keep it up it's so beautiful.
Love
Marlena
These works are masterful and deserve much more rewards then these fingers can supply you. This
is just a token of my esteem for you and these
words so eloquently written and colorfully spoken.
I love them all and if I must say so my very favorite was: 'Food Was An Afterthought.' It brought tears of laughter to my eyes. Thank you for sharing these 3 works of art.
This imprint touches my heart, as I felt like
this while walking near the edge of the sandy
beach in Monterossi, Italy just a few short weeks
ago. I left my heart, and imprint very solid, very deep; also wearing my taves water shoes. Thank you for sharing it was a delightful memory.
Thank you for sharing I'll be back to visit very soon.
Sincerely
Mduci
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I found myself sitting in on this dance and wishing
him to find that one person that could end his pain. Pity that he found no answer to his dreams and lives out his life only in his dreams. Such a lovely poem written with such passion and longing. Your painting was very expressive and captured his very essence. Thank you for sharing this lovely piece.
Sincerely
Mduci
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Very beautifully written and tastefully done.
Funny that just moments ago I was viewing a
greeting card with the picture of the 'Mona Lisa'
who from many critics over the years has been the
rumors that this was of course the Mary that kissed the Masters feet. So, thank you for sharing this piece with us and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
Marlena Duci
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This is such a wonderfully told story of past memories, those of colorful youth, laughter and
happiness. How we all must be reminded of those
wonderful days when sisters and brothers could
be the only people in the world for the time and
it didn't matter. What wonderful times with just the family. I could see the picture you painted of the children eating the mangoes and enjoying them right down to the very last one, for the hot lazy summer days that we thought would last forever. Thank you for sharing the joy and the taste of that wonderful fruit, and for all the memories of the past. keep up the great writing.
Sincerely
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What a very nice piece you've written to that special
someone. I love your play with words about the band on his finger letting the reader know that he is your life choice and partner.
Thank you for sharing this work with us and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
Mduci
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What a lovely tribute to a strong gifted women, who with no skills other than taking care of home and family, and with little education pulled herself up and flew like that beautiful butterfly. God bless her, and I salute you for writing her story.
Thank you for sharing this timely piece and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
MDuci
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Yes, it is true the first thing you notice are the eyes. I think everyone who ever cared about another person or even a new born child wants to look into the eye's. For they are the windows to the soul and every deed happy or sad is in the eyes. Thank you for sharing and I look forward to visiting you again.
Sincerely
MDuci
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