ShelleyA~15 years at WDC's (shelleya) Reviews

Create New Item

Read & Review

Community

Browse By Type

Browse By Genre

Writing Resources

Thu, Jul 3, 2025

9:43am EDT

Members: 707

Guests: 2,081

Total Online: 2,788

SPONSORED ITEMS

Writing.Com Images For Upgraded Members

Need a new look? Grab a Writing.Com image to spice up your posts and emails!

Noticing Newbies

A warm welcome to our newbies; come meet new and not-so-new members of Writing.Com!

Daily Flash Fiction Challenge

Enter your story of 300 words or less.

The Writer's Cramp

Write the best poem or story in 24 hours or less and win 10K GPS!

BY ONLINE AUTHORS

Writing

Thoughts on writing.

Me, Myself, and I (2025)

Talking to myself, as usual…

WAR MACHINE

A machine, like a cross between a wooden tank and a battleship, appears at Glen Hartwell

Crystal Pokémon Index

An index of all Crystal Pokémon.

READ A NEWBIE

Alfaz Jo khamoshi samjh na sake

“Yeh nazm un jazbaat par hai jo hum kehna to chahte hain, magar keh nahi paate. .”

The Woman of Evermore City

Thy story is based on the queens of England and their stories of Revenge. Also ficton

Chapter One: The New Guy

Title: Walking Through the City of a Perpendicular Universe. About living in that universe

~Holy smoke and dying embers~

A cathartic poem about the struggle between good and evil. What path should one choose.

BY ONLINE AUTHORS

WAR MACHINE

A machine, like a cross between a wooden tank and a battleship, appears at Glen Hartwell

Crystal Pokémon Index

An index of all Crystal Pokémon.

Cosmic Healing

A poem inspired by a Get The Picture? prompt.

Me, Myself, and I (2025)

Talking to myself, as usual…

Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/shelleya/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8

ShelleyA~15 years at WDC

Review Requests: ON

4,636 Public Reviews Given

4,671 Total Reviews Given

Public Reviews

Previous ... 4 5 6 7 -8- 9 10 11 12 13 ... Next

176

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3961793

Review of Tiredness

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello 💙 Carly: poems & novel

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Tiredness"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for your poem as it reflects its intent capturing the essence of it while acting as a portal inviting the reader into it. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
A good write about the affect of tiredness on a person. Heartfelt and introspective. Very nice use of brevity. Well crafted Free Verse which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives.You use this poetic device well through coloring so the picture you paint is vivid and enables the reader to see and appreciate the power of fatigue which we see through the lens of your eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Good use of Simile: to be tired is "like a heavy cloak"; bears down "like a freight train" - very nice descriptive/comparisons that give power to the images.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this poem.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express in a powerful way what it's like to be tired, run down while at the same time seeking "rest" so you can feel rejuvenatd with life. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Nice alliteration, good assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis to your thoughts as well as make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following line(s):
"I climb into darkness and pray for peace" - I like this powerful image and emotion that is expressed beautifully in this line.

~Overall:
Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

177

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3961028

Review of Words Fitly Spoken

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Nylsaj Nomis

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Words Fitly Spoken"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for your poem reflecting its heart as it acts as a portal to draw the reader into it. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
A good write that is heartfelt and inspirational. Your faith shines through in this piece. Uplifting and encouraging. Well crafted Free Verse that is short, concise and succinct.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Very nice use of this poetic device as these words are 'colored' in a softness of care and comfort that any reader can appreciate.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor about words fitly spoken - "buoys the soul" - and trials are "mountains high". Good descriptive comparisons.

~Rhyme:
Very nice execution of internal rhyme in line one (spoken, token); in line two (love, above) and in line six (hope, cope). A nice mix of feminine and masculine rhyming.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling. This is wonderful advice and encouragement of how powerful words can be in uplifting the spirits of others. I can relate to this wisdom you express.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Nice use of alliteration, good assonance and consonance. Spelling: in line six, change give to 'gives'. Punctuation: just a suggestion to remove the comma at the end of line one; at the end of line two, change the period to a semi-colon; remove the period at the end of line three; remove the period at the end of line five and remove the period at the end of line seven. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"A word fitly spoken from a heart that has been softened.
Buoys the soul with hope and give you strength to cope." - beautiful words of wisdom that touches the heart.

~Overall:
Good closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

178

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3950541

Review of Some Caring for Karen

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Joey's Summer Sparkle

. Good day to you.

"This is a Rising Stars Poetry Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Some Caring for Karen"

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for your poem reflecting its intent, capturing the essence of it and is inviting to the reader. Nicely done.

Form/Style:

A very good short write and tribute to this special friendship that is heartfelt, concise and succinct. Very nice use of brevity. Well crafted free verse with strong use of internal rhyme.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives which utilizes the coloring of one's thoughts and feelings that you express so well in this piece. You paint a vivid picture of a warm friendship that any reader can appreciate.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Nice use of metaphor for this person who is "a soft song" and "a whisper" - a creative descriptive/comparison about her.

Rhyme:

Very good use of internal rhyme throughout this poem between lines and within lines. Nicely done.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion; you express your feelings in a way that is charming with a touch of romance.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is good with a strong use of repetition for emphasis of feeling about this special woman in your life. Good use of alliteration, assonance and consonance.

I especially like the following lines:
"No longer alone, with only one thought her face does appear to me.
She calls out my best, puts my protests at rest." - you express beautifully, from your heart what she means to you. You are blessed to have such a friend in your life.

Overall:

Very good closing lines. Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on!
** Image ID #1864448 Unavailable **

179

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3928575

Review of She Danced With the Prince

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello iluvhorses

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Short Story Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your short story "She Danced With the Prince"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

Title
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your short story. It sets the stage for your story, reflecting its heart acting as a portal to draw readers into it. Nicely done.

First Impression/Structure
I enjoyed this back story for the fairytale, Cinderella. It is a well crafted narrative seen through the eyes of its main character, Tansy. I love the descriptions of the time, the scenes and the feelings of family and friendship. The story moves along quite well. I could see the pictures you painted with your words very well, thus keeping my attention from the story's beginning to its end.

Grammar, Spelling, Punctuation
You have a wonderful vocabulary and you use it well in this piece. Grammar seems to be spot on; I didn't notice any errors. Spelling and punctuation is done well. Although you use the dialogue sparingly, it fits in well with the narrative.

Character and Idea
I like Tansy very much. You flesh out her character, personality and how she feels about her family and her interaction with the Prince since she was a little girl. She expresses her fondness of her brother Antony and his friendship with Prince Andrew. The reader really gets a good picture of life within the boundaries of palace where her father is a confidante of the king. Tansy is smart and likeable. You bring out her shyness, kindness and intelligence. We see that in how she learns and tends the medicinal herbs as taught to her by the palace cook.

Other Points/Overall
I like how the story builds its story with the upcoming Birthday Ball for the Prince, a very special day where the young ladies ready themselves for this special night. You also paint a picture of the Prince, his kindness, politeness, his chivalry that is implied... and I love the subtle ambiance of romance that is implied throughout your story. It's never overstated; it's just right. There is a beginning, middle and end to your story-- the Prince's first meeting with Cinderella. A nice place to end this story. This is truly a story within a story. A most enjoyable read. Write on!

** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

180

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3927776

Review of Sanctuary

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello 🌖 HuntersMoon

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Sanctuary"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for it and reflects its intent while acting as a portal inviting readers into it. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
A good write about your special place deep inside that is heartfelt and introspective. A good interpretation of the picture prompt. A well crafted Trijan Refrain with near perfect form (line six has seven syllables, should be eight).

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You use this element of poetry very well in this piece. Through the lens of your eye, you paint a vivid picture of this place where memories are kept, a place where calm resides that any reader can appreciate.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor: "whispering winds of memory" and "worry's mist"; and nice use of personification - the winds "sing in dulcet tones" - good descriptive/comparisons.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. A nice mix of perfect dactylic, feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling; you express your inner thoughts and the memories you hold in this special place with subtle power in this poem. I can relate to them.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; strong use of repetition for emphasis of feeling, as well as being the device that drives this form of poetry. Good use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion to change the period to a comma at the end of line seven and in line three of the last stanza remove the comma. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"Whispering winds of memory
swirl in darkened mystery." - I love the eeriness of these two line and the image it paints. I also like how they sound when read aloud.

~Overall:
Good closing lines. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

181

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3927241

Review of Leprechaun Gold

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Lord Norry Wolfsbane

. Good day to you.

"This is a Rising Stars Poetry Review"

I am reviewing your poem"Leprechaun Gold"

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It caught my attention and sets the stage for your poem reflecting its intent as it acts as a portal inviting readers into it.

Form/Style:

I like rhyme and fantasy and this has both. A very good write and story poem in the first person about one caught in a spell to capture this elusive pail of gold. Skillfully crafted rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You use this device well in this piece. Through the lens of your eye you paint a vivid picture of trying to retrieve this fairy gold at the end of the rainbow that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm and nice execution of iambic tetrameter.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Nice use of personification "The Sun decided not to play" - good descriptive comparison.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. Near perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling; you are a very good storyteller. You express the excitement of the chase to win the pot of gold and I like how the suspense builds slowly throughout the poem.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is good as is the use of repetition for emphasis on the gold and rainbow. Nice use of alliteration, assonance and good consonance. Spelling: check line four in second stanza 'anyone' is one word. Punctuation: in the first stanza, remove the periods at the end of lines one and two, add a comma at the end of line three and add a period at the end of line four. In stanza two, add a period at the end of line four. In the fourth stanza, change the periods to commas at the end of the first and second lines. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"The clouds broke up, the rain still fell.
And I was caught within a spell." I like how these lines sound when read aloud; the beat is spot on and sets the rhythm for the rest of the poem.

Overall:

Good closing lines. Well penned and an enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1864448 Unavailable **

182

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3921987

Review of Lost

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Lucius Cage

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Lost"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem reflecting its intent, acting as portal to draw your readers into it. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
I love short poetry and this one is a good example of it. A good write about questioning where and what your place is in the world that is short, concise and succinct. Heartfelt and introspective. Very good use of brevity. Well crafted free style metered rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Imagery and descriptives are nicely done. Through the lens of your heart, you paint a picture of your soul, fueling a fire to seek and find the place that is yours in the world that any reader can appreciate.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice personification of the soul, that it fuels fire and enrages desire. Good descriptive/comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aabbc. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed well in this piece.

~Tone:
Deep expression of emotion; you express with power your feelings about need to know your place, who you are to be in this world, something that all of us has wrestled with sometime during our lives. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion to change the period to a comma at the end of line one; to change the period to comma at the end of line three and remove the period at the end of line four. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
Because this poem is so short, I like all the lines of the poem. They contribute to to the theme of 'who and what you are to be' that is expressed with fervor. Nicely done.

~Overall:
Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

183

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3921572

Review of Epitaph to Chivalry

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Peter Stafford

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Epitaph to Chivalry "

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem; it sets the stage and reflects the poem's intent acting as portal to invite readers into it. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
A good write about the death of ideals in knighthood; the loss of honor and glory that is heartfelt, dark and introspective. Well crafted free style metered rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You utilize this element in poetry, the shading of character exposed, well in this piece. You paint a vivid picture of his abandonment of ideals that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Good personification/metaphor of chivalry. Nice personification of his sword, it 'dubbed' or called him to service; creed, as a 'mime' and 'Romanticism' as a 'damsel' in distress. Good descriptive/comparisons.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aabbccddee ffgghh. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling. You express in a powerful way this darkness that created loss which affected faith, honor, courage and the righteousness of the quest that have been lost through the ages.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis on that loss. Good use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. Spelling: line six in first stanza, the word after sword should be 'that' and in line six of the second stanza, "done" should be 'down'. Punctuation: first stanza, line two change the comma to a semi-colon; lines four, six and eight, change the comma to a period. Second stanza: change the comma to a period at the end of lines two and four. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"His honour sullied, his righteousness dust,
The sword the dubbed him given to rust," - powerful emotion and loss of character painted in these lines. I like the sound of them when read aloud.

~Overall:
Good closing line. Well penned and an enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

184

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3921521

Review of Simple Deeds

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Anita E.

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Simple Deeds"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. Concise and to the point. It sets the stage and reflects the intent of your poem, acting as a portal inviting the reader into it.

~Form/Style:
A good write and message about reaching out to others. Heartfelt and inspiring. Well crafted free style metered rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Nice use of imagery and descriptive. You paint a vivid picture of the power of a smile and a warm 'hello' that can uplift a persons day that any reader can appreciate.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is nice; line to line transition and breaks are nicely done. Nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
The use of these elements are not applicable in this piece.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good with as is the rhyme scheme: abcb. Every second/fourth line in each stanza is perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling; you express beautifully how random acts of kindness, just by giving someone a smile from the heart, can make a person's day... uplift them and encourage them, just by this small deed that is so easy to do and shows that you care. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the use of repetition for emphasis of the power of a 'simple deed' and how it affects the giver and recipient. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion - in stanza one, add a comma at the end of line one, remove the comma at the end of line two and add a period at the end of line four; in stanza two, remove the comma at the end of line two and add a period at the end of line four. This will make the rhythm and flow even better in my opinion. I also recommend that it's good practice to put a period at the end of a sentence so the reader knows you've started a new thought. It gives emphasis to a series of thoughts, in this case, how and why one should do these random acts of kindness,

I especially like the following lines:
"These little things
So simple to do,
Are not frequently done
But they can be by you" - powerful and very nicely stated words of wisdom that all of us can actively participate in daily that help lifts other's spirits, as well as our own. A lovely message.

~Overall:
Good closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

185

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3920482

Review of Hope's View

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Anita E.

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Hope's View"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It's sets the stage reflecting the intent of the piece.

~Form/Style:
A good write and message about the bleakness of life and the glimmer of hope that is heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free style metered rhyming couplets which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Very nice use of this element of poetry. I like how you use shades of color which evokes the feeling of dreariness. You paint a vivid picture of desolation through images found in nature that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice personification of clouds as a protector. Good descriptive comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aa bb cc dd ee ff gg hh. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece. Nice internal rhyme in line six (every, be, free) and in line twelve (you, view).

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express the gloominess of the day and its affects on ones emotion, yet there is a glimmer of hope and a message how to kindle it and make it grow that is encouraging to the spirit. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis and will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion. Also, I recommend that you limit the use of articles (i.e. the, and, etc) for example - add a comma at the end of line three, remove 'And' in line four. This smooths out the flow.

I especially like the following lines:
"Hard to be found and yet it is there
A spark of hope that floats in the air" - I like these words of encouragement; this is so true at times in our lives. Hope is never far away when we look for it.

~Overall:
Nice closing lines. Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on.
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

186

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3918830

Review of Mother bird's love

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Alexi

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Mother bird's love"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for your poem reflecting its intent. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
I love short form and this is a fine example. A good write about this fledgling that makes his first flight. Good use of brevity. A well crafted Tetractys. Perfect 1-2-3-4-10 syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Very nice use of this element of poetry. You paint a vivid picture of the relationship between a mother bird and her younglings, one of which draws on his courage to take his first flight from the nest that any reader can see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
This element is not applicable in this poem.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this poetry form.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express beautifully the family unit of birds in their natural habitat that I can relate to very well.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion to add a comma at the end of line three. A strategically placed comma at a natural pause makes the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
I like all lines of this short form because they contribute to the whole picture of the 'story' in this poem. Nicely done.

~Overall:
Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

187

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3916798

Review of Amazon

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E | N/A (Unratable.)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Osirantinous

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Amazon"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for your it, reflects its intent and acts as a portal that invites the reader into your poem. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
I love this form of poetry and you did a good job with it. A good write and tribute to your mom and her bravery in her cancer fight. Heartfelt, uplifting and encouraging. Very nicely shaped. A skillfully crafted Enteree. Perfect syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You utilize this device well; I like the 'color' implied in your description of your mom's courage. You paint a vivid picture of her bravery that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm. Nice use of enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor in defining your mom as an "Amazon" woman. Good descriptive/comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this form of poetry.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling; you express your love and respect for your mom with power in this piece. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of your mom's character. Good use of alliteration, nice assonance and consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found.

I especially like the following lines:
I like all the lines of this short poem. All the lines contribute to painting a vivid and powerful picture of your mother's character and your love and respect for her that shines throughout the piece.

~Overall:
Very good closing lines. Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

188

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3916793

Review of Marriage

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Lina Black-So Far Behind!!!

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Marriage"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is fitting to the subject of your poem. It reflects the intent of the poem. Nicely done.

~Form/Style:
I love form poetry and this one is a favorite. A good write and message about the bonds of marriage on ones wedding day that is short, concise and succinct. Heartfelt. Good use of brevity. Aesthetically pleasing. A skillfully crafted Etheree. Perfect syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is nice as are the descriptives. You use this poetic device nicely in this piece. Through the lens of your eye you paint a good picture of the bonds of matrimony and sharing lives with each other and friends that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm and nice enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Not applicable in this piece.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this form of poetry.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express the importance of love shared and the ceremony that bonds two people together, blessed by God and celebrated with friends and family. I can relate.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the use of alliteration, consonance with nice assonance. No spelling errors. Punctuation: just a suggestion, to remove the comma in line seven after 'expand' and to add a comma at the end of that line and to remove the comma in line eight. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"explaining, true meaning of bonds
held in love, brought by God, in front of
Friends and Family, graced with harmony" - a beautiful statement for marriage that is heartfelt and touching to the heart.

~Overall:
Good closing lines. Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

189

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3916767

Review of God's Kiss on Earth's Breast

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Alexi

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "God's Kiss on Earth's Breast"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. It sets the stage for it, reflects its intent, capturing its essence and acts as a portal inviting the reader into the poem.

~Form/Style:
I love form poetry and this is a good example of one. A good write about nature, God's creation that is short, concise and succinct. Very good use of brevity. Very nicely shaped. A skillfully crafted Etheree. Perfect syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You use this poetic device well in this piece. Through the lens of your eye, you paint a vivid picture of this scene in nature that is visual in its strong images that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of personification of the trees - they are "waking green sleeping giants" and "praise God's kiss of rain" - good descriptive/comparisons.

~Rhyme:
This element is not applicable in this form of poetry.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; one get's the feeling of awe at the beauty and power of this scene in God's creation that I can relate to very well.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling errors. Punctuation: just a suggestion, to remove the '...' in line five and in line ten add an apostrophe 'earth's' (it's possessive). Also, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis and make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"sleeping giants to stretch proud
trunk as refreshed branches praise God's" - powerful imagery and personification in their praise of God. I like how these lines sound when read aloud.

~Overall:
Good closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

190

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3914072

Review of Steam

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Anabelle8

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Steam"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A nice title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. Just a suggestion, a title sets the stage/tone for your poem and can add distinction to it. It should be engaging and original to draw readers to it. I recommend this because poems tend to be short and the title can act as a portal inviting a reader into it. For example, I might call this poem 'The Beast', but this is just a suggestion.

~Form/Style:
A good write about steam, its traits, and the almost eerieness of it. Well crafted Free Verse which I enjoy. I like the brevity of this piece.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as is the descriptives. You use this important tool of poetry very well in this piece. Through the lens of your eye you paint a vivid picture of what steam from boiling water looks like, as though it has a life of its own that any reader can see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice personification of steam; very nice use of simile about the steam - it whirls and twirls "like dancer's, entwining themselves" - a good descriptive/comparison. I like the strength of and appeal to a reader's senses in the building of this image.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not necessarily excluded from Free Verse, but in this piece, it is not applicable.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; I like your use of visual that spurs my senses, to 'see' the steam as having a life of its own... for a time. Nicely done.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis. Nice internal rhyme in line six (whirling, twirling). Nice use of alliteration, good assonance and consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion, in line five change the tense of looking to "Look" and at the end of the line, change the period to a comma. In stanza two, at the end of line two, remove the comma. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"the tentacles of
The beast retreat slowly,
Obediently," - I love the description and power of these lines. It's a vivid image and I like the sound of it when read aloud.

~Overall:
Good closing lines. Well penned and an enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

191

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3913874

Review of 09 November 2012

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with Reviewing Reviewers ~ ON HIATUS

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Sunny

. Good day to you.

"This is a Reviewing Reviewers Poetry Review"

I am reviewing your poem "09 November 2012"

Title:

A nice title that implies a day of relevance and significance of a change to the bearer, in this case, the writer of the piece reflecting the poet's intent drawing me in to read the poem.

Form/Style:

I love short poetry and I like the depth of this piece. A good write about the loss of a brother that is short, concise and succinct. Heartfelt and poignant. Very nice use of brevity that stimulates thought. I like the subtle rhyme.

Imagery:

Not applicable in this piece.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Not applicable in this form of poetry.

Rhyme:

Nice use of feminine end line rhyme that is executed nicely in this piece.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion; you express in a powerful way, your deep feelings of sadness and loss that is implicit (understood without being said). My condolences on your loss. I know you feel it greatly.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Good word choice as is the use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Nice use of alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found.

I especially like the following lines:
I like all the lines of this poem because of how short it is and that all lines contribute to the one thought-- the loss of your brother and your wonder as to whether you're still a sister without him... profound.

Overall:

A good closing line that is powerful. Well penned and a good read. Write on!
** Image ID #1618761 Unavailable **

192

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3913109

Review of Autumnal Dance

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with Circle of Sisters

Rated: E

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello 🌖 HuntersMoon

. Good day to you.

"This is a Circle of Sisters & Rising Stars Poetry Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Autumnal Dance"

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem, setting the stage as it reflects the intent of the subject to draw readers to it.

Form/Style:

I love short form and this is a good example of it. A very good write about the colorful beauty found as leaves fall to their final rest. Excellent use of brevity. Heartfelt and whimsical. A skillfully crafted Saraband. Perfect form that is short, concise and succinct.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye you paint a vivid picture of the autumnal scene that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm and execution of iambic tetrameter.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Nice personification of mistral... it's ability to sing and "leaves" dancing that are creative descriptive/comparisons.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aaa bcbc. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed with precision in this piece.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling; you express the beauty you see around you in this autumn season that I can relate to very well.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is good; nice alliteration, assonance and good consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found.

I especially like the following lines:
"They dip and swirl without a care
ignoring me as I stand there." - I like the rhythm of these two lines, expressing the 'dance' of leaves in a magical way.

Overall:

Excellent closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1664809 Unavailable **

193

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3913001

Review of Curse the Sun

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Kitty Can Write

. Good day to you.

"This is a Rising Stars Poetry Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Curse the Sun "

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem that sets the stage reflecting the intent that drew me in to read your poem.

Form/Style:

I love short form and this style is one of my favorites. Dark and heartfelt with clever word play. A well crafted Trois-par-Huit, near perfect form. Check line seven in the third stanza. It is seven syllables, should be six syllables.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye, you paint a vivid picture of death in its shades of color in expression of pain and sorrow that any reader can relate to as it blots out the light due to ones grief.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Nice use of metaphor for death - as the reaper "leaves my soul behind, unsung" - a good descriptive/comparision.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aab bb ccc. A nice mix of perfect feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. The darkness of death and the heartache it brings permeates this poem with power. I can relate to it.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is good; nice use of alliteration, good assonance and consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found.

I especially like the following lines:
"As morning breaks, dazzling beams of amber glow.
This heart aches, dripping through the wake of tomorrow. - powerful lines of sorrow's pain; I love the use of double entendre in the 'wake' of tomorrow. Cleverly done.

Overall:

Good closing line. Well penned and a good read. Write on!
** Image ID #1864448 Unavailable **

194

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3909748

Review of Play Ball!

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Isola Bertolucci

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Play Ball!"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. I like how in these two words you set the stage for the theme of your poem.

~Form/Style:
A good write about the excitement that fans bring to a ball game that is short, concise and succinct. Clever word play. A skillfully crafted Cinquain. Perfect 2/4/6/8/2 syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of this "base ball" you create a vivid picture of the roar of the crowd awaiting the pitch at all ball game that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice personification of the baseball and what it would say to the fans. A very creative descriptive/comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this short form poetry.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express the passion for the game powerfully in this piece that I can relate to.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of alliteration and dialogue. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion to remove the comma at the end of line two. This will make the rhythm and flow even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
The Cinquain is also known as the 'American' haiku. Since this form is so short, I like all the lines because they contribute to paint a vivid picture of the fun of fans at a ball game that is expressed with power in this piece.

~Overall:
Good closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

195

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3909594

Review of There was a young man from France,

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (3.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Booksaregreat

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "There was a young man from France,"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A nice title that is suitable to the subject of your poem. Just a suggestion,
because this is a short poem, I'd recommend a shorter title and not use the first line of your poem.

~Form/Style:
I enjoy short form and this one is nicely done. Nice use of humor, almost slapstick. A very nicely crafted Limerick with good form that is concise and succinct.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of the demise of this man who tried to rescue a toad in this funny situation.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is nice; line to line transition and breaks are nicely done. Nice rhythm although it could be a bit smoother if you can add another syllable to the first line making the syllable count: 8/8/5/5/8 instead of 7/8/5/5/8

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Metaphor is not applicable in this poem.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aabba. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express absurdity of this man's action and lack of judgment that nicely uses dark humor.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of alliteration, assonance and good consonance. No spelling errors found. Punctuation: just a suggestion to remove the comma at the end of line one; change the comma to a period at the end of line two and remove the comma at the end of line three. This will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
Since this is a short form of poetry, I like all the lines because it contributes the picture/impagery as a whole.

~Overall:
Nicely penned and an enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

196

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3908946

Review of Transitions

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello 🌖 HuntersMoon

and Cherokee Rose

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Transitions"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is original and draws me in to want to read more. It sets the stage for the theme of your poem with creativity.

~Form/Style:
A very good write about a coming storm that is short, concise and succinct. Good presentation and interpretation of the image that inspired this piece. Seamless. This poetry is written well, smoothly continuous that if I didn't know that two people wrote this poem, I would think it was written by one poet. Skillfully crafted Monorhyme. Perfect form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye, you paint a vivid picture of this storm that is on the horizon that any reader can see in their mind's eye. We get the clear sense of movement, windiness and rough waters that descend that really doesn't need the added image that inspired it. Bravo.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm. Uniform ten syllables per line in both stanzas executed beautifully.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice metaphor: "whitecaps begin their wind-dance on the bay" - very good descriptive comparison of the coming storm.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aaaa bbbb. Perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed with precision in this piece.

~Tone:
Good depth of feeling; you express well the storm in its furor with clarity and power.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance. Spelling: line three "into" one word. Punctuation: Just a suggestion: line four - change the period to a comma after 'out' and change 'There' to lower case. Line six: change the period after down to a comma and change 'Beaches' to lower case and in line eight change the period to a comma after 'coming' and change 'It's' to lower case. This will make the rhythm and flow the poem even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"whitecaps begin their wind-dance on the bay.
Crab like, the boats scuttle in to the quay." - I love these lines, they paint such a vivid picture and one can almost feel the rough movement of the bay.

~Overall:
Very good closing line. Well penned ad a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

197

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3908934

Review of Broken

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello 🌖 HuntersMoon

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Broken"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem, a reflection of its essence that sets the stage for your theme.

~Form/Style:
I love short form. This is very good write about the cause of a broken heart that is short, concise and succinct. Heartfelt and excellent use of brevity. A well thought out interpretation of the quote prompt. A skillfully crafted Five by Five. Perfect form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as is the descriptive. You paint a vivid picture of anger and the pain it causes to oneself and to the person on the receiving end of it that any reader can see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm and nice enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor - "love slowly drips" - a good descriptive/comparison of sorrow.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: ababa. A good mix of perfect feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed with precision in this piece.

~Tone:
Deep expression of emotion. Powerful. You express well how being sorry can't wipe away of words said in anger... not easily forgotten as you break the heart of the one you love and causing you both pain.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of dialogue, alliteration, assonance with good consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found.

I especially like the following lines:
Because this is such a short form of poetry, I like all the lines. They contribute to the whole theme of the sorrow that results from anger, a powerful message and warning to others due to ones ire.

~Overall:
Well penned and a good read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

198

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3908594

Review of Love Is Like Rainbows 14 lines

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Yellow Rose

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Love Is Like Rainbows 14 lines"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A beautiful title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

~Form/Style:
A very good write about the wonder of true love as seen from the perspective of the beauty of a rainbow. Heartfelt and whimsical. A skillfully crafted free style metered blend of free verse and rhyming couplets which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye and heart, you paint a delightful picture of the miracle of a rainbow, of it being one of a kind; always different and yet the same... much like love.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm and enjambment.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of simile - a rainbow suspended in air, like "the love to people might share" - a creative descriptive/comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is good. A good mix of near rhyme and near perfect dactylic, feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed well in this piece.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling; you express the miracle of love, it's creation like that of a rainbow that came into being through God's love.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good as is the use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors found. Just a suggestion, strategically placed commas at natural pauses will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

I especially like the following lines:
"Then I stop and think no man could create this marvelous entity
It seems to appear out of nowhere and then disappears into infinity
Think how fragile it must be suspended in thin air
Almost like the love two people might share" - simply beautiful; deep, profound, and thought provoking is the miracle of rainbows which also holds true in love and romance.

~Overall:
Very good closing line. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

199

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3908025

Review of Were Equal .

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Tyesha

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your prose poem "Were Equal ."

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
A very nice title that is suitable to the subject of your poem (although I think you have a typo here: should be "We're Equal"

~Form/Style:
I love short form and brevity that is well done. This does both. A good write and message that is encouraging, uplifting and inspirational. Thoughtful and heartfelt. Well crafted prose that is short, concise and succinct, which I enjoy.

~Imagery:
Not applicable in this piece.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor - "taste of excellence" - a good descriptive/comparison and very good suggestion of the appealing flavor that all of us can experience.

~Rhyme:
Nice use of internal rhyme: line two (free, key) and line eight (be, nobody).

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling and beautiful words of advice about treatment towards one another that I can relate to very well.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis. Nice alliteration, good assonance and consonance. Spelling: check line two - should be "grudges". Punctuation: place a period at the end of line three after feelings; check line five - after each should be "other's" and line seven should be "It's".

I especially like the following lines:
I like all of the lines because they contribute to the whole theme of this prose in regards to one's deportment, a code of conduct and behavior for all of us to live by as an act of respect toward one another.

~Overall:
It has the feel of a well stated monologue with very good closing words. Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

200

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3907309

Review of Fall's Spire

Review by ShelleyA~15 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Hello Maverick

. Good day to you.

"This is an official Paper Doll Gang Poetry Rockin' Review"

I am reviewing your poem "Fall's Spire"

for the "Gang's Monthly Review Board"

~Title:
This is a good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

~Form/Style:
I love Japanese short form and this write is a beautiful example of one. It is concise and succinct. Excellent use of brevity. A skillfully crafted traditional haiku. Perfect 5/7/5 syllabic form.

~Imagery:
Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye, you paint a vivid snapshot of the wonder of this breath taking lake scene that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye.

~Flow/Rhythm:
Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm.

~Metaphor/Personification/Simile:
Nice use of metaphor for the dew - "chilled kisses" - vivid descriptive/comparison.

~Rhyme:
Rhyme is not applicable in this Japanese form of poetry.

~Tone:
Lovely depth of feeling; you capture the beauty and essence of this autumn scene, a visual that any reader can relate to. Very nice aha moment, contrasts nicely with the previous lines.

~Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:
Good word choice; strong alliteration, good assonance with nice consonance. No spelling or punctuation errors Just a note: haiku is written in lower case (exception: proper names).

I especially like the following lines:
Since this is Haiku and is Japanese short form poetry, I like all the lines because they contribute to the whole theme, a beautiful scene found in nature. Delightfully done.

~Overall:
Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on!
** Image ID #1797003 Unavailable **

Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/shelleya/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8