Neat small story about despair, I don;t know the reference in the description. I think though this is prose at least, or free form poem. It just bare no imagery, no characters. The repetition would make great stanzas. I'll show you.Your first paragraph as a beginning poem.
A light tapping on the door of despair.
She knocked, and I let her in.
She sat silently for a while, saying nothing.
The room began to feel dingy and dirty.
The longer she stayed, the more it felt as though smoke had filled my lungs.
Basically putting each sentence on its own line. Makes it easier to read, I don't think its a story. Thanks for sharing and I hope I was helpful as that was my intent. Good day!
Very well done. arboreal creates a world of mystery and beginnings and endings. You capture that essence in small glimpse of gracious imagery. I enjoy the woods, during the day songful, and scents, at night dark, creepy and misleading.
I don't have any suggestions to improve or change this but feel it could be perhaps another stanza or two. Again Thanks for the poem. Spooky, Cute & staiNed
Not for the weak stomach people indeed. I got a lot of Jeffery imagery happening in my small head, but super entertained, despite a small headache. To have a friend like this, and be so young, to know the adults are worse, well it just a great story. I'll admit I usually don't go this brutal but you lead your readers so gently I couldn't help myself.
At first I kinda had a thought what breed? but realized fast a small dog for sure, The ending is superb, when I think I'm not and there's more and a cliffhanger. You have a great talent for flash fiction and stories in general. Being able to create such yucky imagery and feel for Chuck is creative on so many levels. I will be back again, your just too good.
What an interesting story based around Santa Claus, but without all the commercialisation that's usually done. My poor attention span super duper enjoyed this. Crazy easy reading, with no fluff and mixed imagery. Your stuff is fast becoming my fav, so easy, entertaining, flash fiction, in a size my poor vision can see.
Thanks very much, little me has no suggestions, but am impressed.
Very cute, easy to follow and nice rhyme. Teddy the dog? I could imagine this quite clearly and brought me a smile. Little kids and their imaginations. It's a sweet look playing a game, instead of trembling under the blanket. I don't have any suggestions, honestly warm hearted. Thanks for sharing.
I nailed it, 10/10. I'm a fall baby and it's my favorite time of year. Part for spooky season, but the rest all the great things about fall. Easy not over complicated questions, and edited great. Thanks! I appreciate that it takes time to create activities for others, "crackle"
I enjoyed, have a good one.
Thanks! Another word search, a fun few minutes to relax, enjoy my coffee and think about what I'm thankful for. This took me longer than I'd care to admit, but as word search are one of my favorite things this is spot on entertaining.
Presentation great!
Fun Factor Sweet!
All in All superb!
Kudos! and again thank you for taking the time for a fun activity.
Found this on my newsfeed, and although spooky season is over I enjoy word searches I couldn't pass up. I was multi tasking so it took me about fifteen minutes, and I enjoy poetry but form scare me so there were some I never heard of.
Not flashy, just simple and fun! Thank you for creating and enjoy your day!
Lyrics are tricky, cause they're basically poetry put to music, and it difficult to feel that beat sometimes. This is well written, Grunge. Hard, dark, angry in your face imagery. So angry. I don't see any punctuation errors, and grunge is one of my favorite genre of music, Godsmack is very good, but perhaps..
We’re all of us twisting
We’re all of us resisting
We’re all of us insisting
Hates gone too far
Yeah, hates gone too far
Blood-stained tradition’s, built with our dead
Believe me, life has no comparison
It can’t be replaced
Upon hate, turn, walking away
We are all twisting
We are all resisting
We are all insisting
The hate has gone too far
Yeah!
The hate is too far
Blood-stained tradition, built on our dead
Can't be replaced
Just hate, indifference, turning away
That's what changes I'd make, more tense change to put the reader right in the moment, instead of being something that happened. I did enjoy this, and thanks for shearing with me, I hope I was helpful as that was my only intent. have a good day.
Oh my Goodness all that hype, all that planing, I could see his face such character building and he died! How entertaining! This is great and again small enough for my short attention span. Poor Josh he will be remembered, flashing down the river. I really enjoyed this and honestly your are of my favs for small fiction. Thanks!
Work poem, brought me to the question what kind of work? This could be a strive forward imagery type poem too. I had to read it a few times, not a lot of imagery but straight to the point. True not everyone works the same and some feel some may not as good. The only suggestion I have is the first line concentrate's "concentrate is". Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on love, trying to explain how that word works for you and your other half.Well written, simple pleasant imagery. Kudos! I'll go with what the lovey dovey drops you dropped, but personal opinion aside, I'll pass.
Very old written poem, Random Review link found for me, there's a nice transition from Gram laughing in tears to all the time passing and crying tears. I won't act like I know this poetry form, and in all honesty try to hid from forms. Creative, somewhat somber feeling.
Thanks and I have no editing suggestions, I'm so tired. Keep the thoughtful poetry coming.
Cotton Candy Clouds what a sweet image. This is a kind stable poem just just daydreaming under the sky happy and content. Such relaxing imagery. Thanks! Tense changes from past to present, and it catches me, but that might be your intent.
I stand silhouetted at the top of barren hill
I would stand..
Speaking of being in the moment of watching the clouds as a storm approaches. Dream of being under the tree, than go to standing on the hill. Thanks for the warm huggee poem.
Random Review link helped me. This was interesting and the misleads to other than what was actually going on are a nice touch. Has a mystery feel, but it more humor. You used the prompt great, I enjoyed and appreciate the small size. I don't see any errors, Thanks!
Not often have a read a poem about the financial side of death. Well expressed I read this a few times. I suspect this is somewhere with taxes, credit people leave when they die for whoever gets that debt, and I also suppose many don't think about this, their funeral costs and that's about it, unless you've dealt with this personally and this poem seems to have.
Conversations as hard as they need to be need to happen with the living before their death gives sleepless night both from grief and the long term debt. No errors, well written, Thank you.
Good old romance that so many feel, the slow burn of years together, the end of the novelty stage and good honest love. I suppose a couple would be so connected they felt as one. Simple, not embellished, made me smile. Thank you and enjoy your day wherever you may be.
I enjoyed this moody poem, and got on board on what is being expressed. That great voice in our heads that trips up the happy voice. A dark cloud looming brining you down like an unexpected rain shower. Keeping to some form was a added touch.
Well done, to the waitress hobbling, not knowing why or even why it mattered to know, to "slurp" his soup. I enjoyed this a lot, as I often avoid short stories cause I lose interest and this didn't disappoint. The image of a small toes in soup was delightful!
I read a story once where yogurt became self aware and took over the world. This held the same type of humor. Well done Thanks!!
A spooky word search, quite hard too. All in the theme of the best time of the year. I enjoyed it, and honestly happy to see more word searches. Thanks and enjoy your day!
Little confused by the title, since the prose expressing imagery of winter, frost, cold temperature, trees free from foliage,ice. Thank goodness spring comes. Cold stark feelings and small and to the point. Thanks!
Your poem was highlighted in Random Review and I couldn't help myself. Contest entry and so sad without saying a lot. Very very sad, I guess I relate more than I like to, but saying hopeless is such a change from most I come along.
Fav!
Happiness is a mirage,
an illusion with no meaning.
No suggestions, it is well edited, but in that simply expression it reaches far. Thanks!!! Spooky, Cute & staiNed
Well thought out prose covering a lot. I agree with the sentiment just being in my flannel, with my cat and a book or anime, as long as we are happy none on the noise matters. We are all the same just trying to get through the one life we have, and if that means some old school, that's no problem. I enjoying this, see no errors. Thanks!
Well thought out short story, not overbearing or judgemental. Being clear was interesting and explaining your draw to Athena is nice. I see no errors, and honestly have no suggestions.
Good luck in finding what you seek, and have a good day.
slow paced and wow! quite the imagery. Third line, " in truth she drew "in" a pain filled final breath" parent might be "parents" since mother and father were mentioned. "but" could be omitted. well written. Thank you for sharing and I hope I was helpful as that was my only intent.
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arboreal creates a world of mystery and beginnings and endings. You capture that essence in small glimpse of gracious imagery. I enjoy the woods, during the day songful, and scents, at night dark, creepy and misleading.
I will be back again, your just too good.
This took me longer than I'd care to admit, but as word search are one of my favorite things this is spot on entertaining. 
My review has been submitted for consideration in "
I'm so tired. Keep the thoughtful poetry coming. 
