I like it. Maybe you should put a blank line between stanxas after the lines in italics. I think that might add to the impact of those lines in the poem. I like the promise to be friends forever. The thought of staying friends through thick and thin and life happenings makes this poem strong. Thanks for sharing.
...three or four cars, instead of for
Okay... this is an interesting story. By saying that was the last thing he remembered, does that mean he is stil alive as a vampire? I'm guessing that's what happened. It's a good story. Thanks for sharing it. Think about adding how she bit him.
This is very interesting. I don't know if 13+ is the correct rating or not. I'm still new here. I'm glad you finally said who Marjorie was. I was quite confused about her being stuffed. I liked all the different ways you had to describe things. I got a little lost in the conversation, but I liked the story. Thanks for sharing.
It's clear there are many reasons to go to visit Paris. Would you learn the language for the visit? There's no mention of what you would do to prepare for this trip or how you would make it a reality. I wonder what you would think of the people there, other than the numerous artists of all kinds. Thanks for sharing.
Wow. That is quite a picture. Listing the items he pulls out and giving background to them helps to tell the story of her life. She sounds recently divorced or separated. I like the grumbling. Maybehe expected a response from her as he so rudely went through her belongings. Thanks
This is very nice. Did the book open itself across the room? I guess that's the picture of the first stanza. I just got confused because I thought she was opening a book herself, then she was eying the book across the room, so maybe there were two books. Oh well. I did like the story this poem tells. I like the idea that an old book still has exciting tales to tell.
This sounds like a poem about abuse. It's an interesting remark on it with the comment You're not alone. It's true. It feels like you are saying she is more beautiful because she is flawed (abused) because she is a survivor perhaps. It's unclear. Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed reading it.
This is interesting. Thank you for the glimps into the future. New York is no longer near the ocean? It's in the middle of the dessert? This story blows my mind away. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading this.
...it was God who had made, not make.
It would be great if there were blank lines between the paragraphs to make it easier to read.
The story is good. I like the clothepins for the kids and the secret fort they built with them. I think the alien story is more believable, but the God story is less scary. Thanks for sharing.
She taps her foot, not his.
...presses on her, the burn - I think there should be a comma to separate the thoughts. But I feel like he had something to do with the burn from the curling iron.
This is interesting because the three stories are so different. I wonder if the first two grow up to be the third.
This is thought provoking. I like the line about the two believing in themselves and being together. That's a nice sentiment. You really brought out the vocabulary for this poem. It's good word selection. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading it and I enjoyed how it ended.
Now that's love. Great poem. I found this poem by using the random review option. I like the line about the eyes charming your eyes. It gives such a wonderful sense of the overpowering sense of being in love. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading this.
This is a very nice poem. I found it by using the random review option. I like how you honor the baseball sport. At least that's my best guess as to the sport discussed here. I like that the children are born with power. An I like that things happen their way. The poem gives a nice feeling to children's sport activities. Thank you for sharing.
I found this by choosing random review. This is a cheery piece of poetry. It sounds like she motivates the other bowlers to join in the fun. She likes the feel of it I guess. You have some words in here I have to look up because I don't know them. I wonder if you intended to use out of the ordinary words. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading it.
This is very interesting. You have quite a variety of stuff to talk about here. My family owns a farm, too. So I find the farm references nice to read. The hair problem sounds huge. I hope you find a solution for that one. It sounds important. Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed reading this.
This is interesting. I found it hard to follow, though. I like the idea that life's issues could be solved with a good enough poet or author doing the fixing. I think it should be swallows newr the end, instead of swallow. Thank you for sharing your way to fix the eorld. I enjoyed reading it.
This is interesting. It does feel like it is part of a much bigger story. It's a good picture of a man feeling like he doesn't have any places to turn to in his situation. Thank you for sharing this. I enjoyed it. I did struggle with the paragraph that has dialogue for both people in it. I think it should be in two paragraphs to make it easier to understand.
The I's should be capitalized.
Is that bad thing should be us that a bad thing.
I would like it if this was broken up Into smaller chunks of text with a blank line between chunks of text. It's a nice piece of work showing how people are able to control and release anger at will. I like that. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading it.
Take a look what should be take a look at what.
Full sense of wonder (there are two ands here with one having a space in it)
Watched the while thing should be watched the whole thing.
There show should be Their show.
I enjoyed this story that says it will be continued. I like your general style and how there is something special about the girl who seems to summon the winds. Thank you for sharing.
A coarse voice of a policeman with interrupts... Either the with needs to be removed or something needs to be added after the with.
This is a nice piece. I play the flute so that makes it extra fun. I like the spiritual connection the man and the woman shared. The magical music was good, too. Perhaps it's devine intervention rather than magic per your story. I liked the left over coffee gift, but I wished the mother would have given paper money in lieu of change she didn't have. It feels like the story takes place in New York. That's a good setting. It's hard to get the busy people to give. California folks give to street performers better. I hope I'm giving you what you want. Overall I liked the piece, but I wish the vendor would give the flute player extra food, too. Thanks for asking me to review this.
I like it. It seems melodramatic for the robot to stab the dirt. I gut it's an intimidation tactic, so I guess it makes sense for that. It's also very interesting that the robot did something so out of the ordinary for his kind. It feels like he's a robot who is evolving into a machine with human characteristics and feelings. So that's an interesting angle to look forward to in the rest of the story.
This is cool. I like the feeling of urgency to be with this person. It sounds like the laughter brings him closer to her, like he's drawn to her by some other worldly force. This poem packs a lot of punch and would be great to give to a special someone. You should write more romantic/love poetry. Thanks for sharing.
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