Janine's (janinecb99) Reviews

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#3964998

Review of Bare Hand

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.5)

Hello Winnie

My Thoughts: This is an interesting look at how major events change the population and how easy it is for people to forget history before their time. The image of how people aren't allowed to show their hands because of contageons is quite scary.

My Favorite Part: I like how the artist described the painting to the girl. It helped me understand why she was so curious about it.

My Suggestions: I have no suggestions.

I enjoyed reading this. Thank you for sharing it.

Write On!!

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#3964988

Review of The show that goes on with or without us

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

Hello Kare

My Thoughts: This is a beautiful tribute to the web of life in the wild. This is nature at work.

My Favorite Part: I love the title. Yes, this does go on with or without us.

My Suggestions: I have no suggestions for this piece, except to wonder what tight rope of nature the creature is on, since spider webs are supposed to be sticky.

I enjoyed this piece. Thank you for sharing it.

Write On!!

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#3964944

Review of 3R's

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Hello dogpack

My Thoughts: This is a great reminder of why reviews are important.

My Favorite Part: We teach, we seek, we share, we critique is my favorite line. It feels like it sums up the value of reviewing. I especially like the concept that reviewing helps both parties.

My Suggestions: Maybe it's just me, but I thought every line of a poem is supposed to be capitalized. I think it makes a poem stand out more in importance.

I very much enjoyed reading this poem. I never thought about writing a poem about the art of reviewing. You gave me ideas for my writing. Thank you for sharing.

Write On!!

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#3964422

Review of Life of the Beatnik

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.5)

Hello Jenny

My Thoughts: This piece painted an intetesting picture when you said they gathered in bagle shops, rather than coffee houses as I had imagined. Now I picture these people hanging out in bakeries.

My Favorite Part: Dungarees... I love that word. I didn't know this item about Beatniks. Thank you for educating me on this point.

My Suggestions: They must have done a little more with their lives. Weren't they into things other than bagel shops? What else did they do? I'm just curious because I thought of these people as more deep than that. I expected them to have more in their lives.

Thanks for sharing this. I enjoyed it very much.

Write On!!

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#3964290

Review of Soul's Disease

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (3.0)

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Hello Inspired Soul

My Thoughts: This is a short, but deep poem. It accomplishes a lot in a few words.

My Favorite Part: The opening line sets up the poem for success.

My Suggestions: I think it would be good to add to the poem to explain why the ticking is louder. Is it because of new stress or just more time?

I enjoyed reading the poem. Thank you for sharing.

Write On!!

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#3964104

Review of My Favorite Season

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.0)

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Hello Marylou. Welcome to "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"

My Thoughts: This is a great picture and thought for the season. The words are well chosen.

My Favorite Part: I love the color red for the words of the poem. It helps to capture the color of the leaves turning.

My Suggestions: Keep going with your writing and poetry. I have never written one of these types of poems, so I envy your ability.

Write On!!

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by Maryann

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233

#3963962

Review of PELE

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

Hello Andrew

My Thoughts: This poem captures a feeling of the masses. Pele is so famous around the world.

My Favorite Part: They were feared in all corners of the globe is a very powerful line in the poem. I also liked the note that every line had ten syllables. That takes a lot of effort to meet that requirement.

My Suggestions: In the last stanza, till needs an apostrophe to show it it shortened from untill ('till). Other than that, I didn't see any other things to be fixed. I don't know about the defeat seventy years ago and I felt left out because of it, but the rest of the poem was so vivid, I put this thought away.

Nice work.

Write On!!

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by Maryann

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#3963916

Review of THE VAMPIRE

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (2.5)

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

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#1300305 by Maryann

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...but are they true. - There should be a question mark at the end of this.
Are (they) fictitious? Sp?
...learnt should be learned
It looks like several question marks are missing.

I liked reading this theory, but it was difficult to understand at times. Read it out loud and maybe it will be more clear where the difficult spots are. Thanks for sharing.

Please put a blank line between paragraphs to make it easier on the eyes to read.

235

#3963912

Review of Prologue

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

I like this a lot. There is a ton of opportunity for these two to have a long relationship with many adventures and obstacles to overcome. I wonder if she is with another man at the moment, since it seems some time has passed since they were together. It seems like an enduring relationship. I found this by using the random re iew feature.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963854

Review of A Victorian Journey

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !

This is lovely. Please put a blank line between paragraphs to make it easier on the eyes to read. I think the last sentence should have a period, instead of a question mark. I'm guessing there are other letters going the other way because of what was said, but it would help if you made mention of receiving the letters and make note of them more in these letters. I think it would make it easier to follow. This is a great piece of work and I would love to read follow ups to it. Thanks for sharing.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963770

Review of A Typical Evening at Home

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

Wow... This is quite a piece of writing. You need to fix the line breaks that came from your word processor or text editor. But other than that, this was quite intense. I would love it if you added a note about what job she has where she can handle it successfully with her condition as bad as it is. I'm glad I was able to help you get it posted. Click on the tiny menu to the right of your title in your portfolio to choose edit item to get back to the screen where you can fix the line break issue.Good luck. Keep posting.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963741

Review of The Acorn Woodpecker

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.5)

Very nice. The pounding gets to everyone. I think your missing a word in the second line of the third stanza. I think people might fit in there to make it sound better. I really like the sense of urgency because he has three sets of twins. That is a wonderful picture.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963739

Review of Encyclopedia of monsters volume1: undead

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: 13+

| (3.0)

...where at least a moderate amount - It looks like it's missing some words, perhaps where there is at least a moderate amount.
...strength of there bones - It should be their bones because they belong to them

This is an interesting piece. I like the part about the skeletons not wanting to be disturbed from their slumber, so people should be careful of waking them. I think there are more entries needed for the other undead creatures.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963737

Review of About me

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.0)

Welcome! This is wonderful that you have taken a new direction with your life. I have been on this site for a couple of weeks now and it does make a difference to put your writing out there and have it reviewed. Why not put some of the pieces from your class in your portfolio for the group to review? If you're doing well in class, then you might want to hear what others have to say.I think it's an online class, instead of a online course.

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963638

Review of Calling

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (4.0)

I like this. It's a nice idea to realize you are someone's lost love, because that means you are loved. It sounds like you don't like that you aren't in love at the moment and that you're old. Even though I like where this ends, what if it continued with a way to unite with this petson who is in love with you? Wouldn't that be cool?

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#1300305 by Maryann

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#3963601

Review of My Unrequited Feelings For You

Review by Janine

In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group

Rated: E

| (3.0)

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After some years, the two of us - I think it needs a comma.
...'cause even though we're close - I think it's the wrong spelling for because and I think it needs though in the sentence.
...I cannot stand this anymore - I don't think last is the correct word.
...know each other deeper - I think having deeper coming earlier is difficult.
...let these emotions out - I don't think this is the correct word to use.

This is an interesting story. I feel like there is a lot of slang used that makes it difficult for others who don't know this slang to understand. I really do think letting this guy know your feelings is a good idea. You're the ones spending time together. Thanks for sharing.

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