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I'm good at evaluating the writer's creative statement or message. If there is no statement, the piece seems disconnected and it's difficult to see the purpose. Many readers would question whether there is a purpose at all. I'm good spotting language usage and grammar, punctuation and spelling problems. If corrections are needed, I'll point them out to you under suggestions.
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Public Reviews
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751
751
Review of Happy  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Okami! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about a poet who is counting his blessings.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: The poet is happy with his possession. It has its flaws, but it belongs to him. At least he is fortunate to have a possession. He is counting his blessings.

The poet has a stick. He doesn't complain. It's heavy,and has thorns, but he doesn't complain. Most memorable to me: His body is bruised, and his hands are sore, but he's happy because the stick is his.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed. You have used the word stick numerous times. You might want to try varying the use of this word.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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752
752
Review of The Nectar Thief  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Wolfbane! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about elusive hummingbirds.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: It's the thought that counts. The photo might be a little substandard, but the poet had the joy of snapping the camera and enjoying not one but six hummingbirds.

The endearing hummingbird has comments to make in this poem. He tells the poet not to get too close or he'll fly away. He's just been robbing the poet's vine tree. The nectar is free. The poet responds, telling the hummingbird he has been trying to get a photo for two years but each time he flies away. Most memorable to me: Six hummingbirds made his day. He took a minimally acceptable grey photo of six hummingbirds.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Nice consistent rhyme pattern. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and they are not mentioned they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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753
753
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Neva! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about gratitude and the benefits of adversity.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: I think of gratitude as looking on the bright side of things. There is goodness in all things. We need to find it and capitalize on it while praying to God and asking for forgiveness.

The soul improves with each problem it encounters and each test passed. Gratitude in adversity is the key to spirituality. Most memorable to me: In your prayers give thanks for each test you are given. The grateful soul becomes a butterfly or a star.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled in your poem. Some nice metaphors, eg butterfly and the star. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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754
754
Review of A Love Poem  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Tim! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only. .

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about genuine love and not so-called contemporary tomfoolery.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: In my opinion you have the perfect marriage, an eternal partnership that is part of God's peaceful and even magical realm. The word magical suggests a fantasyland of perfect marriages. How fortunate you are.

This blessed couple does not believe in tomfoolery. They are a timeless partnership of promise. Most memorable to me: Peace springs forth in a journey that does not end. They will prosper for all eternity in God's sacred and magical realm.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem with vivid description. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.
Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of And There You Are  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Keaton! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about the poet's sense of a unique beauty of a woman.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: This poem reminds me of a well-preserved classic woman, beautiful in all respects even with her flaws. She is more beautiful with flaws than without flaws and she fully accepts her aging as well as her flaws. Your poem adds up to this conclusion where I'm concerned.

Your beauty is crafted by a genetic artist of the highest caliber who has his finger on the pulse of everything beautiful. You're perfect except that perfect pales by comparison. No one knows you Ike you know yourself. You are wonderfully flawed. You can embrace true happiness without regard for anyone else on this earth. Most memorable to me: The spark of your love is our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the master of your life. He is the splendor of all that is right with who you are on both the inside and the outside.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout the poem. Nice imagery, eg you're as amazing as any siun in any sky. Good logical development. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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756
756
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Harry! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem describes daring to find love.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: How many times are young eligibles told that their true loves might be around the corner. They're sure it will never happen, then sure enough a young person finds himself in love, married, a father with responsibility. Life moves swiftly from this point on.

The poet had a yearning for a woman, but they were too young. With her rudeness he learned to guard his emotions. Later if he thought a woman was a potential mate, they parted. He grew cynical from life lived alone. His heart became cold as stone. He expected to die with love unknown. Most memorable to me: Then he found happiness with a woman whose eyes locked in a stare with him. To find love one has to trust and dare.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
There is a consistent rhyme pattern in your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and are not mentioned, they ar unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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757
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Leighphet! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your articles. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This article is about the evolution of modern day restaurants.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: I am acquainted with the restaurant business and appreciate the modern development of the industry in a suburban area. Yes, we are fortunate in today's society.

Restaurants have changed from family to industrial to economic impact over the years. Earlier in an agrarian culture, farms did all food preparation. Then there was the birth of towns and formal education. Bartering was no longer acceptable. Skills were specialized. At one time one dish only was offered to customers. Most memorable to me: Restaurants with fast foods offered healthy alternatives.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Well-written and organized. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are unnoticed. A few suggestions:
Paragraph 4: comes NOT come
Paragraph 4: was also NOT has also been
Paragraph 7: trips NOT trip
Paragraph 8: they NOT it

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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758
758
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Natalia! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your short stories, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This short story is about a mouse and an owl who saw things differently.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: You have done a nice job teaching what courage is in your fable. Be brave at all costs, just like the mouse says.

A great horned owl slept by day and searched for food by night. The owl watched field mice he might eat every night. One day he saw a different mouse. It had an orange tail. The mouse wasn't bothered by the owl and went about his business. The owl loudly screeched, hoping to scare the mouse. The mouse kept working. Finally, the owl asked the mouse why he wasn't afraid of him. Most memorable to me: The mouse calmly said, "Is living life with fear living? I choose to live life without fear even if my life is shorter."

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:.
Effective fable with a moral. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and they are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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759
759
Review of My baby  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Wolfwonder! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem describes the poet's dreaming of having a baby in the future.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: Parent child bonding is stronger than most anything on earth.

The poet's baby will always be lifted above the world for all to see. A love as strong as the poet's will forever last a lifetime. You, Angel, are stronger than you know . You are part of the poet and the poet is part of you. Most memorable to me: The poet will always be there for you.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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760
760
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Jack! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your articles. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This article is about Hawkfield Gallery.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The scope of this article is in the area of art works, not music.

Art and music are experiencing a boon with the advent of digital technology. Music is prone to piracy because if the nature of digital technology. Art works are harder to duplicate . To get an original piece of art one needs to get a reputable art collector. Most memorable to me: can visit the Hawkfield Gallery online. They specialize in American Impressionism fine and folk art, decorative songbirds, wildlife bronzes, and shorebird decoys. They have a catalog available. The collector will assist you throughout the process of buying and selling artwork. Gallery is located between Cape Cod and Boston.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Nicely written. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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761
761
Review of I Flicker  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi Voxx! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your pieces, which I noticed in the review pages. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about a moment of sober nests in a storm of chaos.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: Honesty with yourself is very important no matter what you think.

The writer has had no booze tonight. He is a storm that never settles. His being is a focal point for chaos. He is a dying man who doesn't fear death. Most memorable to me: The moment when the night sky is illuminated is his moment when he can think and see clearly. In that moment he knows exactly what he is: He is a storm. He's alone.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Well-written. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are not noticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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762
762
Review of Second Chances  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi April! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*My comments are opinions only.
*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem describes life in the "hereafter" and a second chance.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: Love of a child is powerful, as evidenced by this poem of corpses.

The cojjrpse heard the sound of gold coins clanking on the ground with which she was buried. Her skin was fresh with a new glow and a renewed vigor. She was a former queen, a stranger in a strange land. She noticed a small tomb next to her and a small baby boy smiling. She no longer cared how she ended up there. Most memorable to me: They had been granted a second chance.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Unrhymed, unmetered free verse. Description is vivid, eg II sit shrouded in cloth, crunchy from the stale air of my tomb. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar, or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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763
763
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Espero! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review your tribute. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This tribute was written for the writer's grandparents.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: I am very interested to know more about William Webster's life as a Quaker and a scholar. You might think about including information about him in your tribute.

Katie's parents took in a boarder named Louis. He and Katie fell in love . They had 14 children, 37 grandchilcren and a rocking chair. They knew the importance of giving the children the security of being rocked to sleep, especially when the children were ill. Louis went home in 1977. They had 57 great grandchildren. The writer encouraged family members to write and not leave family history a mystery. Most memorable to me: They were encouraged to be proud of their bloodline.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
The rhyme pattern is fairly consistent in your piece. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and they are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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764
764
Review of The Destroyers  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Tofara! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your piece, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This piece is an introduction to the Rozvi Empire of Zimbabwe.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: The Rozvi Empire is strong, intelligent, powerful and cunning. They do not have a need to be militaristic anymore. They have used their intelligence to develop propagandizing.

The nostalgia elders spoke of a time when life was life and death was another life. Children gathered around to hear stories of those who passed earlier. Rozvi ceased ruling with unquestioned spears.

The song was a wall of mourning, a somber melody about people who felled the Giants of China and India, but were shattered on the plateau of Guru. USW. Elders fell more about the Empire, telling of the Moyo journey NEW and South spreading their philosophies. They ruled because they were cunning. Rozvi said, "We're mighty in war. Will we not lose all we have gained? We are also intelligent. Our plan is to propagandize into the minds of other clans that we are gods. Everyone else will be lower than the weakest Moyo in South Africa in everyone else's minds. Rozvi invented propagandizing. There was no longer a need to be militarily strong. The Rozvi will still rule and are still gods. Rozvi ceded their right to rule from the spear to the cloth.

There was turmoil in Zulu, an offshoot of Nguni. Their only god was Nhulunkulu. Most memorable to me: The irony...Nguni used the same tactics used at the Portuguese wall. They said they should never have thought of defeating the Rozvi

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Overall, your piece is well-written. I have a few suggestions for language usage. I was not distracted by errors in grammar. This comment is a disclosure, stating your errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they are unnoticed.
Suggestions:
1. Avoid the use of ellipsis dots, for example...unless you have left out information.
2. Paragraph 1: fell NOT felt
3. Paragraph 2: also intelligent - omit comma
4. Paragraph 2: "This is what we'll do". Add period after the word do.
5. Paragraph 2: prophecy Rozvi. Add a comma after the word prophecy.
6. Paragraph 2: (See what I mean) Add a question mark after the word mean.
7. Paragraph 2: Add a period after the word saw.
8. Paragraph 3: defeating Rozvi NOT to defeat

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Marylin Monroe  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Tofara! am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about co-dependence.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: I envision a picture of Marylin with a few too many sitting in the lazy heat with wind in her hair and on her dress. You have done a good job of painting a picture by describing Marylin. %

Most memorable to me is: Clinks of empty bottles on the concrete with lazy heat blowing in her hair and on her dress.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Unrhymed, unmetered free verse. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi T. Winfrey! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about a man who gave more than he had to give.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
From the reader: If a man gives more than he has to give, he has nothing left to give, especially when he gives his angel all his trust, love and dreams and she puts a gun to his heart and pulls the trigger.

The poet crawled as a prisoner of his sin in the past. He was ambushed by an angel and he smiled. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and his closest friend. She showed him how to stand and removed blindness. She followed hiim in full faith. He fell to his knees, embraced her, gave her all his love, trust, dreams and happiness. Most memorable to me: tThen she put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled in your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Edge! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about a man who wants to win in his quest for love.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet seeks by day and cries by night. If he finds hatred, you hate him because of his creed. If he seeks peace, you tree him. Most memorable to me: Don't pass judgment and say he won't succeed with his need for love.

Sometimes it seems nothing goes the way you want it to go, no matter what you invest in life. Could be just around the corner. Best wishes.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi Glyn! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only. {-b}

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem was inspired by 1John 4:19.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
People ask how the poet can serve an invisible God. Because He loves the poet too. They question how the poet knows God loves him. By faith and because He sent His only son to pay for his sins. Some worldly people say God is a crutch, but they cannot see His hand in action. Most memorable to me: God is working in the world today, answering every cry. He first loved us even with our sins.

The poet, who operates on love and emotion, could get educated about the Bible so he can defend God. I feel it's important to have faith and to know God loves you, but it s also vital to know God is omniscient, omnipresent, invisible, etc. so you can defend God with Christian tenets.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
There is a fairly consistent rhyme pattern in your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Suggestions:
Stanza 1: how I can NOT how can I a
Stanza 1: odd because NOT odd, because
St. 1 & 3: cannot NOT can not
Stanza 2: He does for NOT He does, For
Stanza 3:how I know He does NOT how do I know He does
Stanza 3: for my sins NOT to His my death
Stanza 4: way answering NOT way, Answering
Stanza 5:omit comma
Stanza 5: situation, but NOT situation, But

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of The Beach  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Patricia! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems for your account anniversary. , Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about a day at the beach.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The water gets thin as children jump and shout. Water sparkles and palm trees sway. Sand spreads like a beautiful quilt. Most memorable to me: Gorgeous shells and sprinkles of shiny silt are present, as the poet listens to the sea's lullaby.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
There is a consistent rhyme pattern. Simile is effective,e eg like a beautiful quilt. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.
Suggestions:
lullabies is spelled lullaby.
seas should be sea's.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Silly Cupid  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Dreamer! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about the symbolism of flowers in a love relationship.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet's spouse says Cupid is full of mush. Once only did he say I love you and that was enough. He believes holidays were meant to take money from men. She received a flower in the past, but he had won an argument. Most memorable to me: It was not the flowers she wanted, but the guy who came home every night.

I agree. The flowers are an attractive symbol, but there is nothing like holding the man who provides for and protects you and has promised to protect you for a lifetime.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
There is a fairly consistent rhyme pattern in your poem. I was not distracted by errors in visage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating if they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of My Dream Lover  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Novel Ideas! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems for your account anniversary. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about the poet's dream lover.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet says her dream man holds her in his arms. She thinks she died and went to heaven when he looks at her. She thinks she is the best thing in his world. Most memorable to me: She feels he'll never leave and break her heart. She awakens and will not mourn. Her dream lover is always waiting, but he is only a dream.

Nothing like your ideal man spinning you out of this world, your awakening and finding he is only a dream. I remember as a young woman being very disappointed that I had indulged in dreamland and there was no such thing as my infatuation.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNfCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem. Some nice imagery, eg like the summer breeze. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors. are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Empty wound  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi Envi! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems for your account anniversary. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only. .

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about an empty wound.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet speaks of pain that never leaves and no one sees it. There is pain from the feelings left. The wound doesn't bleed. The eyes are filled with rage when they look at the face. Most memorable to me: Feelings swell from a broken cage. The feelings can no longer be traced. The line that was there is forever broken.

I find that your poem is difficult to understand beyond the broken cage. You need further clarification as to what the line is that was broken and could no longer be traced.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem. You might try reading it aloud to help bring about a smooth flow of words. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation..This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of I thought of you  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Cerpas! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about the poet's concern for an aging, I'll friend who needs to know Jesus Christ.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet speaks of his chest clenched tight with fear. He fears for his friend's aging and ill health and tells his friend to open heart and mind to Jesus Christ and He will guide his partner. Most memorable to me: The poet is fearful for his friend's next life with Jesus Christ.

Yes! Jesus Christ will guide us. He does soon much for us with the smallest request for help. Just pray! Praise His name.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Consistent rhyme pattern. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Elements  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Mystori! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems for your account anniversary. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* My comments are opinions only.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem is about the four elements.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Most memorable to me : The poet speaks of fire keeping him warm; air whispering soft as breeze on skin is spirit; water trickles down his spine with a lover's touch as in love; earth a show of beauty as in mountains.

The four elements are vital to living beings and objects. This poem is a pleasant way of giving emotional appeal to our very important elements. Reading this poem aloud and asking children to illustrate the four elements could be a fun way to end a unit on the elements for third graders.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout your poem. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist and are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Without you  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi Sunnyblue! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to honor you with a review of one of your poems for your account anniversary. . My comments are opinions only. , Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:
This poem speaks to how much a person can love.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The poet says she loves her partner like thunder loves lightning, raindrops love storm clouds, and waves love the ocean. Most memorable to me: The poet says there wouldn't be a me without a you.

There is a connection between thunder...lightning, raindrops..storm clouds, waves...ocean and above all, me and you.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Nice imagery and simile, eg thunder loves lightning. I was not distracted by errors in usage, grammar or punctuation. This comment is a disclosure, stating errors are not obvious. If they exist, and they are not mentioned, they go unnoticed.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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