Oct 14, 2006
Good Morning! So we've all survived another Friday the Thirteenth ...
Onto the review for Amelie's DARK PURPLE SPARKS.
Dear Amelie: Like the way your style of poetry opens with action on stanzas in present tense (my favorite tense) then blends in a four liner to a description. Which gives flow to the cadence.
Cordially, TEFF
Poetry accepted at:
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Oct 13, 2006
The above item from the tell-tale pen of Unsliced (who doesn't eat aliced bread} outlines four typess of roles in society as pertains to the States primarily.
When one graduates college these days, however much wishful rumor sparks acceptance of the better jobs this is not always the case. Since employment is not the same as it was twenty years prior to this essay on society's inhabitants.
While the author may offer subjects such as Tim McVeigh and Batman movie's The Penguin, of which Divoto did the fine acting job BTW .. the reader is left none-the-less with the beginning concepts of --- essay work as opinion along the "proverbial road" and tackling definitions concerning the author's "hurdles of life."
Which all makes for a very entertaining read, despite viewpoint of course outlines in Sociology which readers may bring to the table.
Dear Unsliced: At our table, reading was encouraged but Dad didn't like my Sociology book so he used to push the Phila. Inquirer in my direction which was a much better read, of course, especially the funnies.
Personally from TEFF
Whoops gotta run, my wheat toast just popped up.
Hope to see more from the talented pen of author/ Unsliced.
THE FLAMES OF LIFE from the poetic pen of D J Sherwood offers a second look at fire as comparisons to life's trials and beneficial lightness aapproach daily lives.
Good ploy, enjoyable poem.
Well, as they say, dear author ....
Write on!
Cordially from: Teff has 8 review badges .... Hosting ....
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Oct 12, 2006
It is a very good thing contest/ judge/ Tornadoday is doing the poetry this year in
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as well as Laurencia for things are absolutely heating up around here.
LON, dearie ... Thanks for your entry, a fine poem about a very nasty spree killer who pounded a beat in Tower Hamlets, oh way back in 1888. But always available each and every single Halloween. Yikes, now, I'm really scared.
How about you, dear readers? Poets? Are you too willing to ride the daily JTR Express?
Best to all contestants, and reviewers wherever they may be.
Thanks, Lon, this is startling stuff!
THE DUKE from Lon a member of the Writer's League.
Somehow, dear author, you've everything going here which a story needs. BETWEEN TWO TIDES is a catchy title. There is much directness. Yet, would like to see .... Greetings my name is _________, thus the first person narrotoir is identified.
My name is _____ and it the year of Our Lord __________.
Of Massachusettes, isn't Kennebeck in Maine?
To give the characters depth whether birthing babies is their thing or not, perhaps the entire family might have a surname after more than 16 plus kb's which leaves the reader completley seraching for:
A. A time era of the past since most readers like a century date and we bring that to the table.
Or B. A little more on geographic setting of the New England States which now seems awash like a nothing place.
Can not grasp fanfiction genre here. If this is modeled on another former tale, perhaps a quote in that direction.
Cordially, TEFF
Offering prizes and tie-ins to warrant more prizes and recognition.
All authors welcome @
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Wow, dearest Amelie, this one is great. Feelings of nature and love abound in SKY MELODY which offers the prefect title for a poem complimenting nature and the romatic side of all humanity as the poem addresses an unseen audience.
Thank you, Amelie, for this one opens the mind to the world outside our windows. At least seen by this revver between the lines.
CAGED IN MY THOUGHTS, A poem from Amelle spells despair in a sense, while the lines tell of the quest to open the heart to love or not to love. Or care or not to care.
Good rhymes throughout with a wispy touch of the indecisive from emotional genre.
Cordially, TEFF
Open for Poetry this year:
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"He reached for a coke."
Best to name characters, always helpful for reader ID and enjoyment.
Two adults, a gorgeous country setting, complete with garden know how's goes awry when ???
TOO MANY RULES from the portfolio of Sue VN is offered on Auto Rewards, page 12.
Somehow the unexpected abruptly ends this flash fiction, sorry to say. Then again sometimes word limitations bring out striking endings without preamble to juicy content.
Cordially, TEFF
Offering some horror this Halloween @
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Fyndorian, wondering if you're losing it here? Just curious, but this seems the dark side of the closed for busines carnival late on the dark, dreary, stormy night. The place we run away from when the moon wanes.
Actually, I was stricken yesterday by a colorful horse in a yard yesterday, so much so that I stop the Lamborghini and stare awhile in admiration. The retired figure adds charm to the neighborhood in a sunny Southern way.
However, CAROUSEL TO HELL leaves no leeway except the action (and who really requires action in a poem) fades away into the night.
Well written, easily read, cadence addictive, vocab with "cailliope" quite the IN Thing from this poet.
Thanks, Fyn, nice read.
Cordially, TEFF
Say, Fyndorian, we're accepting Poetry as this contest goes in the side door this year benefiting upgrades via ----> "Invalid Item"
Here's the gig ----->
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Oct 6, 2006 On Auto Rewards, page 10, WC author, Bentonar offers ESCAPE FROM HELL.
With the intro "based on a true story" we merit the author's ken to weild a terrible ordeal into a plausible story complete with a kidnappee, her parents and realistic dialogue.
Shameful indeed that such crimes exist in our current society. In the past pertaining to the era for the contest below, perhaps you will find another outlet, dear author.
Cordially, TEFF
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In THE ART OF THE END, PROLOGUE we read:
" ... it saw the woman in the distance crying."
Spirit, child, newborn?
With much that borders on the art of guessing, enter a few beings, a man who is "cruel" and "harsh." And the soft vocal female. Both enveloped in a few paragraphs seemingly designed to set the pace while cloaking the actual story-line.
Creative Supernatural tricks above, from the talented pen of WC author, Momo Rhoades.
The Suggestion:
Many times pieces start out this way for this and other genres. However, be that the way on this site, best to forget readers' imagination, a tad, as well as the writer's own and at least add a few concrete sentences of basic explanations.
Good luck in all future writing endeavors, and have the superlative Autumn week.
Cordially, TEFF
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Sometimes we may as authors & readers ask ourselves about content found in brief flash fiction. Should we question same when the genre is appropriately marked?
Are we here to judge a story or comment on member's story deliverence ala grammar, style, form, syntax, punctuation, verbage etc?
Well, yes to all othe above from Teff's vantage at this desk. In the mind's eye of the theme currently explored by WC author, Shredded Rose is yet another take on a wily, unacceptable theme, undertaken by few in flash fiction.
Of the out-of-print hardcover: CALL THE DARKNESS LIGHT by Nancy Zaroulis ...
a young lass is orphaned, casting fate to the wind to work in Lowel, Mass's new industrial age. She also wears long dark "skirts," like "Lana."
In ALONE WITH LANA, Rose presents the fate of a young lady beguiled by men, a bishop, a father, a boy or boys with a car like "Elvis."
Hard to say if this one has the makings of going further ashore, but it does leave a reader holding the bag.
llllllllllll Sidebar: Shorter verbs and predicates avoid the "verb sandwich," a Teffom term for too many words in a sentence for action often glued like down with perfect tenses padding the paragraphs. Some sandwiches here are ham on rye with extra mayo, lettuce, onion ete etc. lllllllllllllll
Cordially, Teff reopening ---->
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How's it going? With your poem FOREVER LOVED: OF AN AUTISTIC CHILD the author seems to outline similarities for these children and a mother of same. Fluent poetic launguage peppers the poem.
The latter rings with a realistic flavor.
The author invites conversational sharing on this subject. Many times this is seen as being partially a diagnosis for border-line reserved children who inhabit the school system. The issue currently swims into the waters of an open book.
And, yes, it must be very hard to witness.
Also, Rebecca, hon, in the first lines you mention three words. These are?
Cordially,
TEFF
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"BLUE M&M from the port of Ellis is not alone, being one of those contest entries which crests the top of the charts. No, oh no."*
Blue M&M is a well crafted must read of high caliber.
When a man, a father takes on the erstwhile responsibilty, quirks arise yes. After his wife dies. But revenge, although unintentinal is exactly the way this one should end.
Fantastic!
Five star rate --- ten star material.
Thanks, Ellis.
Can't wait to see more of these horrors in fiction, yet believable mode.
Paddy, TEFF here, reeling in the skyline beside this river your characters are "drawn" to, where they sit, meet, greet, record the intro, the chance meeting of kin. Tried and true.
Especially glean the daylights of a great twist here near the end highlighted by the lad in the pram's baptized name. We've the lot of them.
Anyways, gliding down the slopes of the story then comes the "bride" and the well the other word, too, which starts with the second letter of the alpahbet that one. When just as a blooming Babs comes along, I thought Bridget. Silly me.
So from the other side of the pond, shiver me timbers something else graces the noggin of this revver, Paddy.
It is this, now, at long last an announcement on PRP while reading THE RIVER by askpaddy.
Sir, smooth, elegant, now Paddy I've attained respect for flash fiction by reading this.
TEFFOM MOFFETT's -------- (drum roll, please) Pick of the week?
THE RIVER by askPaddy.
Thanks, man.
Sincerely,
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
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Perhaps WC author, Thought Particle gives us the blow-by-blow which is for many a WC member at odds with WC addiction, a look see into our daily lives.
And dear Thought, find this reviewer guilty of the need to "linger."
Cordially,
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Say is that my toast burning ... phooey!
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Where there's a few editorials to sample, just to get your motor running, dear, dear Thought Particle. All readers welcome!
It is very pleasant to read your details regarding the setting which starts this writing. This seems the time in life to contemplate things for the first person narrator and the piece falls into place edging those emotions to the surface.
Good job!
Cordially,
TEFF
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As the poets indicates in this adroit relaxer from the norm ...
perhaps we're all in need of
" ... something nice to say."
As we approach another Anniversary for the 911 disaster which brought to the ground the Twin Towers, words of NY-ers such as WE shall never forget are not at even the slightest whim capitulatd to, or about in this poem.
"Siting by the pond" while sitting by the pond can be the title without the 9-11 sceanraio if not used in the piece at all.
One readers opinion, John.
TV offers natural disaster scenes from from Katrina 2005 this week.
We may as poets & authors prepare for more on the Sept 11, 2001 horror as best we can.
Well, words to ponder near river, ocean or pond.
And John, perhaps there are more poems in the muse which are forthcoming. This one misses the mark with title tie-in. Maybe just a little more, a few appropirate lines to stay on topic, methinks.
Best in all writing & poetical muse building endeavors, John.
Cordially TEFF wondering why.
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"Impossible, you (as reader) might scoff to write a poem about "the last tear." Not so, Book Section subscribers. For: enter Pandori with CRYING MY VOICE where a simple action ... "crying" is certainly given a new look with this in-depth, tightly crafted poem." Alabama Courier Times // T.Teffom // Book Section // 8/28
Steph B along with other members is really getting it on! One can see with this item, THE BEST OF THE REST that emphasis for this contest is not on short stories, novels or poems.
Instead, look here to post possible winners for other formats.
Uh, oh, in the intro, why not add blog, which still comes up on spell check BTW.
But that's okay, it's up to those who create dictionaries to recognize blog.
So here we go a-seeking, here we come a-finding and hopefully nominating to at least a half dozen impressive judges the best which is out there amongst us and surely already added to our WC favorites.
So members, authors, writers, artists, bloggers, photographers & welcome guests --- Why not check this one out.
"Writing.com, Author, Sandover Clegane is off and running on Auto Rewards, page 10 with a fast paced intro and prologue for the novel: THE TWINS OF LEGEND. Readers will find in this fantasy/ action/ aventure the setting of Vinculum where a young lord, Jarl faces his men, soldiers who advise he flee future danger in the age old tie in to King James II on his way to France. Well, maybe not but reader sympathy may fall infact with the qualms and trials of Jarl." Alabama Courier News Times/ Fictitious newsrag // T.Teffom // Book Section // 8/26
With MY DREAMS BROUGHT YOU BACK, the allusive unstated absence between the two characters sorts the readers willingness to accept reality from the words.
Where is the lost one in the dream?
When this reviewer wages a guess and answers that question, it seems worse than the usual break-up pattern often encountered in the genre pertaining to romantic poems.
So, advise y'all to click this one, authors, poets, reviwers, monitors, contest hosts and sore into dreamland as many of us often do.
Best in all future writing endeavors, Rachwrite82, and enjoy this site and the coming Autumn Season. Meanwhile, I'll do the same.
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