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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/kingscastle1
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593 Public Reviews Given
970 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with I Write  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
This is a good story. I am curious to know what the prompt was for this. It is written pretty well. I like the first person perspective used and the narrator has a personality that is easy for the reader to connect with. The reader is able to understand the main character's situation and sympathize. The pacing was good making it smooth to read through. Readers are able to get a sense of each of the characters in it. The story doesn't go into heavy detail about how the two people would have interfered or the background of the lead so readers tend to side with the narrator. It works well with the twist ending as the reader comes to realization that maybe it is better to let things play out at the same time the narrator does. It was a nice surprise.

There are a couple of tweaks I recommend:

That how someone else wanted to be with her friends was her problem, not theirs.

They'd been hatching an elaborate plan right until when the party broke up occurred.

I thought their plan would bring about more trouble that than it would solve

Given that the story is told in first person perspective using H & I as an abbreviation is confusing because 'I' is a pronoun that could also refer to the narrator. It took a couple of rereads to clarify it referred to Imogene. I wouldn't recommend using I as an abbreviation for this story.

Overall this is a fun story and I enjoyed reading it. Thank you very much for writing it.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
It's peanut butter jelly time
peanut butter jelly time
peanut butter jelly time
where he at?
where he at?

Fun gif / scene. *Banana*
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3
Review of EToP&P Entry  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Seems like catchy entrance shot for a character. *Heel*
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4
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Classic Star Trek Moment. *Space*
5
5
Review of Orange Butterfly  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice butterfly signature. The animation of the Monarch Butterfly really stands out against the black. *Butterfly2O*
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Review of Tomb Raider 1  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice Lara Croft image. *TorchR*
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Review of Inspiration Shell  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice seashell. *ScallopT* Great image!!
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Review of Unknown Signature  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice Snow covered Mountain image. *MountainsB*
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9
Review of Mother of Dragons  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Khaleesi. *Queen**DragonHead* Awesome Game of Thrones Image!!!
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Review of Signature  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Awesome Warrior signature *SwordR*
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11
Review of Sexy Witch  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Such a cute witch. *WitchHat* Great signature
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Cute Steampunk image. It reminds me a little bit of the Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland. *Trainbr*
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Review of The Sands of Time  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Cool Sands of Time Hourglass image. *Hourglass*
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with I Write  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was fun read. I like romantic stories and this definitely was sweet. It seemed to follow the prompts of the Lodestar contest very well. I like the cruise setting. Both of the characters written in this were very likeable and distinctive making them them enjoyable to follow. As a reader I found myself connecting with and rooting for Tiffany hoping that the romance would work out well for her. It was a very sweet ending and I was happy that everything worked out well for the pair. Thank you very much for writing and sharing this story.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Cool mask *Mask4*
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Really beautiful butterfly. *Butterfly2B*
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Cuteness overload. *Teddy**Cat*
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Review of Eagle  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Cool Eagle picture. *Bird*
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Such a cute dragon. *DragonHeadB*
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Review of Pirate Couple  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Cool pirate couple image. *PirateFlag*
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Review of Halloween Image  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Haunting. Nice Gothic image!! *Cabin*
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Review of C Note 9  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Instead of slightly cute. You went for the whole Kitten Caboodle with this one. *Cat*
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Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Beautiful sunflower. *FlowerY*
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Review of Pumpkins  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Colorful set of Pumpkins. *Pumpkin2*
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Review of Valentine Puppy  Open in new Window.
Review by KingsSideCastle Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Such an adorable puppy. *Dog1* *HeartRate1*
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