This is an interesting little 100 word story. I am not quite sure that I got the point, but it is probably just me. I think the last sentence should read "he was intent on making it so." That would make more sense for me, and it wouldn't change the word count.
This is a fun little 100 word story. I can just see you being stuck on the marshmallow couch, and unable to move. You have given me a good laugh, as I often find myself in a similar situation. How *does* it happen?
Enjoyed reading this. I think it is more a little excerpt than an actual 55-word story, but still a good attempt. I think it has potential. It does have a beginning and end.
Don't give up. These are hard to write. Keep up the good work.
This is a cute little 55-word story. You have done a good job with the format, and hour story has an obvious beginning, middle and end. Didn't see any obvious grammatical or spelling errors.
This is a pretty good little 55-word story. I think you should have broken it up into paragraphs. Perhaps start a new one with "both have closed", and another one using the last sentence. The way it is, the story just seems to run on with no breaks.
This is a good first entry for a 55-word contest. Some of your sentences need a bit of work. Especially this one: A large rugged boot firmly pressed down the right side of my face, awkwardly on the curb.
Is it the boot that is pressed on the curb or your face?
Don't give up. These little stories are very hard to write.
This is a nice little 55-word story. I can just imagine you answering the phone in anticipation with soap in your eyes, and it is only a Bill Collector. Aaarrgghh! Don't you just hate it when that happens.?
You have done a pretty good job with the format and your story does have an obvious beginning, middle and end, as is required in a 55-word story.
Hi, Connie, Eeek! good luck with the moles. Will be keeping you in my prayers.
And thanks for the thumbs up on my story, "Old One Ear."
I have considered volunteering at our local library too, but I am thinking now more along the lines of helping fellow veterans. Don't know exactly what I could do though.
This is an interesting little 55-word story. It kind of leaves the reader with a lot of questions.He? He who? The person that drove off? And why did he leave?
I think that it is great that you are exploring different genres in which to write. You just need a little more practice. Don't give up. These are not easy to write.
This is an interesting little 55-word story. It does not have a clear beginning, middle and ending. It seems more like an excerpt from a story, rather than a whole story.
Also I think the line should read "dark space that seemed to go on for an eternity." I know you only get 55 words, but I think you could have found other places to leave out two words. This sentence does not read well.
You have written an excellent little 55-word story. I could really see your characters, and you did a good job of developing them in such a short space.
You have followed the format well, and have a good beginning, middle and end.
Hi, Hildegarde33, this is an intersting little 55-word story. The setting was a bit unusual, but I liked that. Did people dress for Halloween back then? I am also not quite sure why James "stormed" out the door. I realize you only have 55-words with which to work, but the story didn't quite gel for me.
This is a great little 55-word story. You have said so much in just a few words. You did a wonderful job with the format also. I hope this is only a story and not something that is a part of your life.
This is a nice little 55-word story. You have done a good job with the format. I don't know that it has a clear beginning, middle and end, but still a fun read. Of course, I have no idea how to play this game either, so maybe I just didn't quite understand it.
I enjoyed reading your haiku style poem about the summer sun. You have done a good job with the format, but I don't feel like it quite has the essence of a haiku.
It just seems more like a short poem to me in haiku form.
Have you written many haikus? Maybe you just need a little more practice.
I really enjoyed your little haiku about love and lovers. You have done an excellent job with the format, and have also captured the essence of a haiku.
Soothe is misspelled in the second line. Probably just a typo.
This is a nice little poem in the haiku form. You have used the right number of syllables in each line, fulfilling the haiku format, but it doesn't quite seem like a haiku to me. It just seems like the beginning of, or a short poem.
Hi, Barefoot Bob, I loved your erotic haiku about making love on the beach. I too believe in no rules, and totally related to this poem. I hope you are writing from personal experience. Thanks for sharing.
By the way, Pleasure is misspelled in the heading. Probably just a typo. I always overlook the obvious too.
I loved your poem! I loved the way you compared writing.com to a gem cutter's store, and the way your poem is filled with jewels bright and rare.
I can find nothing wrong with this lovely free-form poem. No grammatical errors, no spelling errors, but then, I wouldn't have expected any from you as a senior moderator.
Best Wishes, Cynaemon
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