I enjoyed reading your lantern poem. It was very good. I have seen these referred to as diamante poems also.
Nice theme. I liked the way you went from air to dirt. Good choice of words, and good imagery. Also good rhythm and flow, as much as possible within the form.
I enjoyed reading your rather sad poem "Butterfly Road".
The poem's title goes very well with the poem. The poem has a good form, with nicely rhymed couplets. The poem has a good rhythm and flow. The imagery is excellent. One can really see the dying butterflies.
I really enjoyed reading your essay on romantic novels. And I so agree with you. That is why I search out the really old ones. There are times when I do want more sex in my books. But as you say, that is not romance. And there are more times when I really just want that wonderful romantic feeling.
Your essay has a good sentiment. It is well-wriiten, makes a good point, and sticks to the point. There are no obvious grammatical or mechanical errors.
Great job. By the way, can I borrow your hubby? Actually, I don't need the hubby, just send the chocolate and flowers. LOL.
I enjoyed reading your poem. I especially liked the way you included the quote in your poem, like a refrain to your verses.
This is a good free form poem. The Title obviously fits the poem well. The theme is one easily understood by the reader. The poem has a nice rhythm and flow, and good imagery.
I see no grammatical or spelling errors. YOu have done a good job here, and it is obvious that you have spent some time on this.
I loved your poem about all the colors of your love. I loved the way you expressed the sentiments in the poem, each color showing an aspect of your love.
This is a wonderful free form poem and I find no errors of any kind here.
Great job!
Best Wishes, Cynaemon
PS. Congratulations on being featured in this month's romance newsletter
I enjoyed reading your little sevenling written in memory of your friend. I am sorry to hear of your loss. I think your poem really touches the reader.
You have done a good job with the form. The theme is good, as are the rhythm and flow of the poem, as far as possible in this form. The poem has good imagery.
I really enjoyed reading your little sevenling about a dog's day. I think I will have to write a rebuttal one for my cats. LOL.
Well, you have done an excellent job with the sevenling as well as the anaphora aspects of the poem. You have an intersting theme, and as far as possible in this form the poem has a good rhythm and flow.
I enjoyed reading your lantern poems about sleep. Lantern poems can be kind of fund to write. I like the second poem better, but you have done a good job with both, following the form given.
Even though they are very short your poems both have a nice rhythm and flow. Good imagery for such short poems.
I really enjoyed reading your poem "How Did I Get Here?" I think you have asked the same questions that many of us ask ourselves each day. Is there an answer to any of these questions? Who really knows. There is a lot of philosphy in your poem. The title goes along well with the poem.
Your poem has a good structure and form and flows along nicely. Good rhythm.
Did I choose the path I took was it planned? - In this line, I think it would make more sense with a comma after "took". It didn't quite make sense the way it was written.
I think I would have liked to see a final verse which maybe answered the questions by saying we are all on a journey. But then, that may take away from the them of the poem, which is to question, not to answer.
Congratulations on your wedding. This is a nice little poem you have written. I would consider it more a senryu than a haiku, as it is really personal, and haiku usually deal with nature. You have followed the 5-7-5 syllable count of both the haiku and senryu, and done a good job.
You have strong images in this work. I especially liked the a last line "sworn on hallowed ground".
Welcome to WDC. I enjoyed reading your short poem and tribute very much. Even though your poem is very short, one can really feel the emotion and sorrow in the poem.
This is a good free form poem. It has a good rhythm and flow. There are no grammatical or spelling errors. Thank you for your attention to such detail.
Welcome to WDC. I enjoyed reading your poem very much. It has a good sentiment, and you have expressed it well. I look forward to seeing many more of your works here.
This free form poem has a good rhythm and flow. There are no mechanical or spelling errors.
Welcome to WDC. I enjoyed reading your poem very much. You have done good job with your free form poem. It has a good sentiment, and you have expressed it well.
Purposefully spreading its limbs around, wild weeds. - should be their limbs
Other than that, I see no mechanical or spelling errors. Good rhythm and flow to your poem.
Welcome to WDC. I really enjoyed reading your short story. You have done a good job. The reader can really feel the fear the character is experiencing. Your story has a good plot, and you have done a good job with your character.
Where had he gone? - think it should be "where has he gone". You changed tenses here.
Walking the short distance to my studio flat, thinking of what I may watch on tv, or maybe rent a film, I vaguely hear footsteps behind me. Why didn't I turn around? To .
This paragraph needs a little work, as you have changed tenses. This might work better:
Walking the short distance to my studio flat, thinking of what i might watch on tvm or considering renting a film.....
Welcome to WDC. You have don a good job with your first piece, and I am sure you will have many more to follow.
Just a few little mechanical things, nothing serious.
Spring has flown away, - don't think you need a comma after this line
The sixth early bright. - this line is a bit confusing. Not sure what it refers to
And “ships at their last sparring - should be an apostrophe after sparring
Or lying to rest.” - should be an apostrophe before lying
Their hopes and still dreams,
Of brave nautical sailors - think it would sound better to say "the hopes", and also do not need a comma after this line
Pain and infliction - think it would sound better to say "pain and destruction". I realize you are trying to rhyme here, and to find the right number of syllables.
Just a few minor things. They do not detract from your over all good job.
I really enjoyed reading your short story. Isn't if funny how life happens sometimes? Actually I was hoping John would find out school had been cancelled for the day because the halls of the school were flooded or something. LOL. You certainly did bring a asmile to my face though.
You have done a good job with your story. It has a nice, well-rounded and easy to follow plot. You have developed your character well, and I like the way he interacts with the minor characters in your story.
I enjoyed reading your poem "Cascade" very much. You did a good job using Stormy's words. The reader can really feel the emotions and the weather in this poem. I especially liked the last verse, and wish I was laying under cherry trees relaxing also.
There were no obvious spelling or grammatical errors.
I enjoyed reading your poem about how someone feels when being hanged. You have done a good job, but there were a few problems.
I am not sure that i liked your leaving out the apostrophe in "I'm" and "don't", and also off the end of words like "hangin". While I can see that you are leaving out punctuation in your pom, some punctuation is necessary to maintain good grammar.
from something that dont seem to b - in this line you have left the "e" off of the word "be". I don't know if that was intentional, or just a typo.
that are slamed on the ground - in this sentence "slammed" is misspelled.
Hi, Amanda, Thanks for responding to my review. I have re-rated your poem as promised.
I enjoyed reading your poem about how someone feels when being hanged. You have done a good job, but there were a few problems.
I am not sure that i liked your leaving out the apostrophe in "I'm" and "don't", and also off the end of words like "hangin". While I can see that you are leaving out punctuation in your pom, some punctuation is necessary to maintain good grammar.
from something that dont seem to b - in this line you have left the "e" off of the word "be". I don't know if that was intentional, or just a typo.
that are slamed on the ground - in this sentence "slammed" is misspelled.
Make a few corrections, and I will be happy to reread and upgrade your rating.
Best Wishes, Cynaemon
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