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4,102 Public Reviews Given
4,316 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1301
1301
Review by StephBee
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading* THE ARTICLE

The author takes a look at some of the things average Americans can find frustrating in life.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

The author is candid, real, and his honesty comes across. There's a mix of frustration and yet pride for what he believes in.

Now, some might consider this piece "gritty," but if you are interested in reading piece that stimulates thought over some of the more confusing of American society, this is for you.

*Star* SOUND

There were no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Star* MECHANICS

I did not notice any gramar/puctutation mistakes.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

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1302
1302
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FORUM

This is a poetry contest and this week's prompt is Shakespearn sonnets. The rules to the contest are easily defined.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

How the contest involves members of the WDC Community. Not only that it's a good way to fine tune an author's poetry skills.

*Star* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctutation mistakes.

*Star* PARTING THOUGHTS

Good use of WDC ML. This is a very eye catching forum. I like how the author provides a link to the list of previous winners.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1046674 Unavailable **


1303
1303
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FORUM

This is a contest structured around helping new authors to WDC to understand the community. The rules to the contest are easily defined.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

How the contest involves "newbies" to the WDC Community. It really is a good, interactive way to learn about WDC and get involved.

*Star* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctutation mistakes.

*Star* PARTING THOUGHTS

Good use of graphics and WDC ML. This is a very eye catching forum.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

~~Image ID# 1058049's Content Rating Exceeds Item Content Rating~~


1304
1304
Review of Meat Loaf  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Reading* THE STORY

This is a story about the author's cat "Meatloaf," and how Meatloaf touched her life.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

I love cats. I really enjoyed this story. It was heartwarming.

*Star* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the first person by the author.

*Star* SOUND

There are no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Star* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

It's really a sweet story.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

~~Image ID# 1058049's Content Rating Exceeds Item Content Rating~~
1305
1305
Review by StephBee
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FORUM

It's a writing contest for WDC. The rules are clearing stated, but check the posts for updates to the prompts.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

How the contest involves members of the WDC Community. It encourages members to compete and interact.

*Star* PARTING THOUGHTS/SUGGESTIONS

If anything, you might want to update the introduction for 2006. At first, I thought this contest wasn't going on anymore until I checked the forum messages.

*Smile* Very good use of Graphics & WDC ML.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

The main characters from "History", Olga and Paul.
1306
1306
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Reading* THE ARTICLE

This is an article about the author, writing.com, and how to navigate around this site. It is a very imfortative.

*Flower1* Highly recommended for newer readers to WDC.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

How organized and articulate it was. I found it a good, enjoyable read. Good use of WDC ML, too.

What drew me to this port? The word "Rasputin." I'm a bit of Russian History buff myself.

*Star* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctutation mistakes.

*Thumbsup* Keep writing!

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

The main characters from "History", Olga and Paul.
1307
1307
Review of Longing Memories  
Review by StephBee
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Reading* THE STORY

This is a biographical account of the author's grandfather after he was released from a Russian prison camp. While in the camp, he finds a baby he gives to his farmer. Years, later, he meets that baby, grown into a man in Romania.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED

It was karma that the baby returned as a man years later to find Teodore in Romania. It was a very heartwarming story that I enjoyed. I thought the author did a good job retelling it and capturing the feel of the times.

*Star* SOUND

There were no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Star* MECHANICS

I found a few minor punctutation mistakes I'm sure the author will catch on an edit.

*Thumbsup* Keep writing! This was heartwarming!

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Mihai & Theresa in a crystal ball.
1308
1308
Review of Novellas  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Folder* THE FOLDER

The folder contains novella which the author is working on. I thought it was appropriate to the contests listed within.

*Star* MECHANICS:

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* SUGGESTIONS/PARTING THOUGHTS

I might consider using a graphic or WDC ML to make the folder a bit more eye catching.

Reviewed by StephB In the Sandbox.

Another Review Sig
1309
1309
Review of Novels  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Folder* THE FOLDER

The folder contains the novels the author is working on. I thought it was appropriate to the contests listed within.

*Star* MECHANICS:

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* SUGGESTIONS/PARTING THOUGHTS

I might consider using a graphic or WDC ML to make the folder a bit more eye catching.

Reviewed by StephB In the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1005951 Unavailable **
1310
1310
Review of Work In Progress  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Folder* THE FOLDER

The folder contains the author's works in progress ranging from novels, uncertain, and novellas. I thought it was appropriate to the contests listed within.

*Star* MECHANICS:

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* SUGGESTIONS/PARTING THOUGHTS

I might consider using a graphic or WDC ML to make the folder a bit more eye catching.

Reviewed by StephB In the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1005951 Unavailable **
1311
1311
Review of Uncertain  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Folder* THE FOLDER

The folder contains the start or chapters of stories the author is still fleshing out. The description of the folder is "uncertain" and I thought it was appropriate to the contests listed within.

*Star* MECHANICS:

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* SUGGESTIONS/PARTING THOUGHTS

I might consider using a graphic or WDC ML to make the folder a bit more eye catching.

Reviewed by StephB In the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1005951 Unavailable **
1312
1312
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FOLDER

The folder contains three stories inspired by the Christmas spirit. They are heartfelt and very inspiring. The contents listed within are very appropriate to the title.

*Note1* This folder was given an awardicon for Inspirial and Creative Christmas Writing.

*Star* MECHANICS

There were no grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Star* SUGGESTIONS/PARTING THOUGHTS

Good use of WDC ML. It's very eye catching!

*Thumbsup* Keep writing!
1313
1313
Review by StephBee
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading* THE POEM

The poem talks about a moment between two would-be lovers.

*Idea* WHAT I LIKED:

The author captures the scene of the moment well. Not only that, he captures the feelings and emotions one has a love touches his heart.

*Flower2* STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem, with the 1st and 3rd lines rythming and the 2nd & 4th lines rythming. The meter is nice.

*Flower2* MECHANICS:

I did not notice any grammar/puctutation mistakes.

*Flower2* SUGGESTIONS & PARTING THOUGHTS:

One thing that struck me was I thought the author was geninuely falling in love but one line reads "I told you sweet lies." That didn't ring quite true to me. Perhaps the lies being told where to impress? It seemed to take a little away from the "geninueness" of the emotion.

*Thumbsup* Keep writing!

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Dimitri and Sharon



1314
1314
Review of Potion of Beauty  
Review by StephBee
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
*Reading* THE PLOT

A rought and tumble cowgirl stumbles upon a shop that promises ultimate beauty but when she takes it, she's in for more than she bargined for.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

The ending. The woman had to return to the shop. Outer beauty comes at a price.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the third person omniscient mainly from LouAnn's perspective.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

LouAnn, the handsome man in the shop.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

The actual dialogue was good, but I might suggest a proof read for dialogue tags. They are used inappropriatly throughout.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are couple of choppy sentences, but that goes back to the dialogue tags. For example, the author wrote:

"Ah, I must get my boss for you then. Stand here, and don't touch anything!"

He said with a suspicious glare as the man limped away from her and left her in the strange shop alone.

The correct way is:

"Ah, I must get my boss for you then. Stand here and doen't touch anything!" he said, with a suspicious glare. Then he limped away from her and left her alone.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I noted mostly puctutation mistakes. Also, I might suggest using Italics when using thought.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

As noted above.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1038695 Unavailable **
1315
1315
Review by StephBee
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

Natasha is adopted by an aunt and uncle when her parents die, but just as she is starting to feel like one of the family, she gets cancer.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

This story is such a tear jerker! It's really done well, but my heart was breaking for this poor little girl. I'm glad her parents saw fit to give her the simple wish she wanted before she died.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the first person by the father. "Dr. Shenony."

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

Natashia, Dr. Shenony, Naina

All are very sympathetic and sweet. I think the Mom and Dad do everything they can for the little girl and thier love really shines here.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

Very good and moves the story forward well.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

None

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Dimitri and Sharon
1316
1316
Review of Unspoken  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Reading* THE POEM

The poem, to me, speaks of the author's unspoken words, I would think "I love you."

*Idea* WHAT I LIKE

I like the words used that bring the "unspoken" concept to life. They were perfect to invoke the image of words unspoken.

*Note1* STRUCTURE

This is a free form poem with no rythme scheme. I would make an arugement for stanzas simply because as is, with no stanzas, it takes away from the meter of the poem as read outloud.

*Flower2* SUGGESTIONS & MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar mistakes, again, I might make an arugement for puctuation & capitalizaton.

Suggestions are as noted before - spilt the poem into stanzas and use capitalization to begin those stanzas. I'd love to rate the poem higher if the author fleshes it out a little more.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Dimitri and Sharon
1317
1317
Review of Armed Robbery  
Review by StephBee
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
*Reading* THE PLOT

The author is witness to a robbery in a jewelry store.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

It was told in such a way that it really got me caught up in the moment. I thought I was one of the people in the jewelry store when it was being held up. The storytelling was vivid and gripping.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is told in the first person by the author.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

The author, gangsters

You feel every emotion the author feels. From just wanting to be safe and complying with everything the gangsters say to little moments of defiance.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

It was very appropriate and used well.

*Flower3* SOUND

There were no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I noticed minor typos, grammar/puctutation mistakes that I'm sure the author will catch on a re-read.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

My suggestions have to do with presentation, really. I would suggest taking the bold off and just using regular font. Use italics only when you really want to get into the author's head. Also, watch your spacing and space between dialogue tags and paragraphs.

This was a very good, vivid retelling of the crime, but it would be more effective if the bold was taken off.


Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1035670 Unavailable **
1318
1318
Review by StephBee
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FOLDER

The folder is called, "A Dozen Maximum, Gently Used." Contained within is letter/memo regarding Uncle Harris, an editorial, and a message forum for Hurricane Katrina.

I found all the contains to be appropriate to the folder. They are challenging, supportive, and inspirational. It almost seems like an eclectic bunch of material, but it theme behind everyone of them makes the folder work and work well.

*Note* SUGGESTIONS:

If anything, I might suggest using a graphic or more WDC ML to make it a little bit more eye catching.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.
The main characters from "History", Olga and Paul.
1319
1319
Review of stories of old  
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Reading* THE FOLDER

The folder is called "Life's Little Lessons" and the stories contained within are light, easy to read and very appropriate. Each story has a lesson, but they are told in such a way that it is not preachy or overbearing. These are good short stories which are inspirational and inspiring.

*Thumbsup* *Thumbsup*

*Note1* STRUCTURE

The author uses WDC ML well to catch the reader's attention. If anything, I might suggest using a graphic as well.


This is a great folder and I'd highly recommend it.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1044818 Unavailable **
1320
1320
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

Hope, who doesn't make much money finally gives a "homeless" guy $5.00 for lunch. What he does with the money will surprise the reader.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

The "homeless" guy isn't who he seems. The ending is the best part of the story.

The name picked for the main character of the story, "Hope" is very appropriate. *Thumbsup*

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the third person omniscient mainly from Hope's perspective.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

Hope, "homeless man"

Both are fleshed out well. As a reader, you understand why Hope makes the decisions she does. The homeless man's motavations are also explained well.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

Very good. It moves the story forward well.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

None. It's a very inspirational story.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

The main characters from "History", Olga and Paul.
1321
1321
Review by StephBee
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

A young teenager is told she has AIDS. The mother takes it hard because the girl is all she has left.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

I liked how the author presented the emotions of the mother and I thought she captured them well. I also liked the fact she tackled a conventional social issue like AIDS - treating it with dignity and respect. The story educates without being preachy.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the third person omnicient.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

Bianca (the teenager) Kate (mother)

Both are fleshed out well. Kate grief is palatable.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

Excellent. It is appropriate and moves the story forward well.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I noticed minor grammar/puctuation mistakes. I'm sure the author will catch them on a re-read.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

If anything I found the centering a bit unsettling on the eyes, but that's just me personally.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Dimitri and Sharon
1322
1322
Review of Silly Song  
Review by StephBee
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

Just a silly little lyric to make you smile.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

I loved how the first two lines evoked that Toys-R-Us jingle. Made me think of my childhood.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are no uneven/choppy sentences

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctuation mistakes.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1035670 Unavailable **
1323
1323
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

Lian has a dream about peanut butter, but when he wakes up he isn't feeling well and cries "I don't like peanut butter." He has another dream about peanut butter which teaches him not to be too hasty.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

It's a very cute little story for kids. It's light, and very engaging to read.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the third person omniscient from Lian's perspective.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

Lian, Mommy, and the King.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

Very good! It moves the story forward well and captures Lian's childlike innocence.

*Flower3* SOUND

There are no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

There are minor grammar/puctuation mistakes I'm sure the author can catch on a re-read.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

Just do a proof read for grammar/puctuation. *Smile*

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

Mihai & Theresa in a crystal ball.
1324
1324
Review of Alexander  
Review by StephBee
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Reading* THE PLOT

The narrator meets up with a former lover who wants to become their lover again.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

The ending! The ending had a surprise I didn't expect.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is told in the first person by the narrator.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

The Narrator. The narrator's former lover, Alexander.

Both are fleshed out well. You understand their motatives and why they did what they did.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

It was good and accented the story well.

*Flower3* SOUND

There were no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I did notice a few grammar/puctutation mistakes that were minor and the author should catch on a re-read. "i" was not capitalized a couple of times and there were a couple mispelled words like "intrigud", "thos" and "explaination".

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

Watch your grammar/puctutation. Double check - a good proof will really make this work stand out and shine.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1046674 Unavailable **
1325
1325
Review by StephBee
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Reading* THE PLOT

This is autobiographical piece where the author recounts a few annecodotes were strangers have been nice to her.

*Idea* MY THOUGHTS - WHAT I LIKED

It was very inspirational. It was written in a nice, light, easy style with draws the reader in. My favorite story was the phone bill from hell.

*Note1* POINT OF VIEW

This is written in the first person by the author.

*Flower3* CHARACTERS

The author

She goes about showing how strangers can be nice and helpful in certain situtations. It really effects one in a postive way.

*Flower3* DIALOGUE

Minor dialogue. This is mostly a narrative piece.

*Flower3* SOUND

There were no uneven or choppy sentences.

*Flower3* MECHANICS

I did not notice any grammar/puctutation mistakes.

*Flower3* SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT

The story repeats itself. I might suggest taking out the second story.

Reviewed by StephB in the Sandbox.

** Image ID #1035670 Unavailable **
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