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1,115 Public Reviews Given
1,116 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Versatile: I'm good at reviewing different types of writing in different ways. Honest: While I do my best to be honest and encouraging in reviews, I don't omit things. If I tell you I like something about a piece, you can trust that I'm not just saying it. All-Inclusive/Well-Rounded: I look for the good and bad in writing. I'll give you an overall opinion as well as the highlights and what needs worked on.
I'm good at...
Giving feedback within set parameters. If you're looking to receive opinions on something specific, let me know and that's what I'll focus on when giving a review.
Favorite Genres
Horror - all time favorite. Science Fiction and Fantasy are tied in a close second.
Least Favorite Genres
Romance. (Exceptions: Dark erotica intrigues me if it's, you know, dark.) I will happily read and review romance pieces, but I might be a little tougher on it than on other genres.
Favorite Item Types
Static Book/Collections.
Least Favorite Item Types
N/A
I will not review...
N/A I'll review anything. If for some reason you don't think I'll want to, feel free to email me with your concerns before submitting a request.
Public Reviews
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176
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Review of Déjà Vu  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello ⭐Princette♥PengthuluWrites Author Icon,

I saw that your item "Déjà Vu" Open in new Window. was featured in the most recent edition of the Horror/Scary newsletter, and I've been trying to keep up on reading those, so I thought I would drop in with a review.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Description:

One thing that I could really appreciate about this piece was the descriptive nature in which you approached the gore. I won't include any excerpts (gotta keep it tame for those reading in the Public review thread) but I will say that you didn't shy away from the morbid visuals, and I loved that. It really paid off for this piece.

*Bats* Tension building:

I really like that as things are starting to appear abnormal in the story, the way you handled your character's decision to just keep pretending like it was all fine. There was one line I felt particularly captured this tone:

Unsettled, he decided to keep walking. Going to school—that was him. Such a good little student, just going to school.




*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


*Bats* End


The end of the story was ambigious, and I really like that. I think it's a good way to end a horror story, and I think that for the most part you did a good job.

The reader is left not knowing what's real and what's a dream, and it's a good reflection of what the character is experiencing. It left me speculating and pondering, which I liked, but there was one gap that I think might have been a little too wide.

It mentions in the story that the suicide attempt is in a game of Russian Roulette - which was interesting, but it's in such stark contrast to the rest of the protagonist's life as we see it, and the surreal nature of that one particular detail was a little distracting for me. It posed a lot more questions than it answers, and I felt like by the end of it too much of my thought power was going toward trying to figure out how a high school student (who doesn't express a lot of other suicidal tenancies) ends up playing Russian Roulette, who he's playing with, etc. I think either having some more hints to that exposition or changing the motivation/circumstances surrounding his shooting would have made the piece more effective.


*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King


Aside from that one question really distracting me from the rest of the narrative, I thought it was a great piece. It was vivid, it was just a little surreal, and it was pretty creepy. A lot of the terror comes from uncertainty, and I think you did a great job with the tone and pacing of the piece.

I can see why this piece was featured, and I'm glad to have read it. I hope I get to read more of your work soon.

All the best


-Cat

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
177
177
Review of Mirror, Mirror  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello David Lamb Author Icon,

I am here to review your item "Mirror, Mirror" Open in new Window. which I found because it was featured in the horror/scary newsletter.






*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Tone:

What stuck out for me about the piece was how you really got across the point that the character was experiencing depression. The self-loathing was very evident, as was his general disposition and distaste for his daily routine. For a short piece you're really able to capture the hopelessness and the feeling of monotony that the narrator is experiencing.

On that note, however, I do think you hit the "every day" motif a little too hard in the opening paragraph. It was good for the story, but since it's a recurring theme later on as well, I don't think it need to be spelled out quite as much right off the bat. Of course, I do have a preference for subtly in writing that not everyone shares.


*Bats* End:

I really like the use of the mirror throughout the story, since it's something that's tormenting him, but since it's also something that he uses as his way out, when destroying it at the end. It was poetic, in a dark way.

*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


*Bats* Characterization


I think one thing that would have made the ending a little more emotional would have been if we had seen a little more of the narrator's personality. I understand that it was probably subdued intentionally because of the emotional state he's in, but I feel like slipping in a few more hints as to what life was like before everything turned sour would have been a really good step into drawing the reader in and make the piece a little more memorable.


*Bats* Formatting


This is just a small formatting thing, but I think taking the time to add either line breaks between all the paragraphs or indents at the start of them. It would just make the visibility a little easier, and then the reader can focus on the story content even more.

*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King



So that about wraps it up. This was a unique story in both content and presentation, the tone was very strong, and I can see why it was featured in the newsletter. Congratulations on the feature, and I hope I get to read more of your work soon.

-Cat

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
178
178
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello willwilcox ,

I decided to read your item "State Of Fatal Rapture" Open in new Window. after seeing it featured in the Horror/Scary newsletter, and I'm so, so glad that I did.

The adult nature of this story pulled me in right away, and the morbid narrative caught me by surprise. This is probably the most disturbing story I've ever found on Writing.Com and I absolutely loved it.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Premise:


I don't know if you're familiar with Max Aaron (he also goes by Unsettling Stories, or iia on r/nosleep) but the premise behind the story reminded me of the sort of stories he writes. I've gotten really used to seeing horror content that borders on erotica on any social media sites where I follow him, Reddit, tumblr, instagram - but I've never seen anything quite like it here.

It took me by surprise, but in the best possible way.

Perhaps it's just because intense horror and erotic content are both considered to be 18+ - but there's something incredibly satisfying about seeing a piece that combines both of those elements, especially in such a seamless way.


*Bats* Style:

The story is beautifully written. The elegant composition of such a morbid tale is the perfect combination for a piece of this nature, since the subject is something that's also wonderful and terrible all at once.

*Bats* Engaging:

Although Jack's deranged character is what really sold the piece for me, it's worth noting that I was hooked almost at once. This wasn't a slow burn of a story, it pulled me in straight away and by the end of the first paragraph I knew that I was going to really like this story.

You didn't disappoint.

*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


My only suggestion is that you write more stories like this. It's been not only one of the best stories I've ever read on your portfolio, but hands down one of the best stories I've ever read on this site.



*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King


I absolutely loved this story. Thank you so much for including it in the newsletter and for sharing it with us here.

As always, it has been a pleasure reading your work and I hope I get the chance to read more of it in the near future.

Sincerely,


-Cat

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
179
179
Review of The Coffee Shop  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

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*Heart* DISCLAIMER *Heart*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Heart*          MEET-CUTE :: INTRODUCTION           *Heart*


"Whisper a dangerous secret to someone you care about. Now they have the power to destroy you, but they won't. This is what love is." - Welcome to Night Vale


Hello Dragonbane Author Icon,

Thank you so much for your formal review request of your item "The Coffee Shop" Open in new Window.. It was not the sort of thing that I usually read, but it is certainly appropriate considering the holidays, and it's good to do something a little out of my comfort zone.

So, let's get right to it.





*Heart*           FIRST DATE :: WHAT I LIKED           *Heart*
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. " - Neil Gaiman


*SuitHeart* Description:

This is more about your writing style than the story itself, but I like that you used a healthy level of description when setting the scene and introducing characters.

I had a particularly easy time picturing Tom from the way you described him so carefully (and in a way that really reflected how much Lucy is thinking about him.)

She guessed his age at around the late fifties, early sixties He was average height with short silver hair, dressed casually he was always very neat and tidy, as usual, he carried a shopping bag of groceries with him so she deduced he more than likely lived alone.




*SuitHeart* Conflict


I liked that the main conflict/struggle of the piece was a little more mature than the usual tropes that are seen in so many romance short stories. Not only is it refreshing to me as a reader, but I think it's appropriate for the characters as well, considering that they're a bit older and would be more inclined to avoid the standard relationship pitfalls that are usually written about.

I don't want to get too into specifics for those in the Public Review Forum who haven't handled it, but it was surprising and overall handled quite well.



*Heart*          BROKEN HEARTS :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Heart*
"Any fool can be happy. It takes a man with real heart to make beauty out of the stuff that makes us weep." ​-Clive Barker


*SuitHeart* Editing


One thing that I usually suggest, and feel applies here, would be to do another round of editing. There were a bunch of small, technical errors that I think one more draft would help to smooth out.

There was one sentence in particular that wandered in the opening paragraph:

It made it stand out from other cafes and restaurants within the mall with a waiter service you placed your order and found a seat, and shortly a friendly waitress would bring it to you very popular with shoppers in the mall.

In general though, there were just instances throughout with things like missing punctuation, extra words being capitalized, etc. They weren't overly distracting, but it's something to keep an eye out for as you work with the piece.

*SuitHeart* Anne and Lucy's Development


My biggest problem with the story itself is that I feel like some of the characters, particularly Anne and Lucy, could have used a little more development. That's something that can be tricky when writing romance, is that you want the romantic interest to be a focal point, but you also want to see the characters having distinct personalities outside of their relationships, which is something I feel Lucy was lacking in a little.

I think this could be easily fixed by just having one or two short scenes added where Tom isn't mentioned - and a great opportunity to do that would actually be right at the beginning of the piece. Anne is already there to talk to Lucy, and establishing their friendship outside of discussing a man would really add some personality to both of them in my opinion.

*SuitHeart* Pacing


The other thing that I think could use a little work is pacing. It's not so much that too much happens in the story, but the story covers a wide period of time, which I think might be working against you to make the piece read as more rushed than would be ideal.

The up side to this is that it feels less like the relationship is rushed because there is time for Tom and Lucy to get to know one another, and as an audience we get to see that relationship develop. The downside is that the pacing itself feels very rushed. Covering a relationship in it's entirety like this is something that I feel would be difficult to do in a single short story, and with all the time skips of weeks at a time, it just felt like a lot of stuff was being glossed over.

That's something that would be a trickier aspect to work on than the other things I mentioned, because I feel like it would require changing the formula, and the final product might be too different than the story you set out to tell. If it's an idea you want to play with, however, I think a couple options would be either to whittle this down to just the highlights with the inclusion of specific dates to mark the evolution of the relationship (which would result in a tighter, shorter narrative) or to consider expanding on some subplots and elaborate on the times that are skipped to draw this out into a longer format, perhaps even a novella.

I don't read a lot of romance, but for what it's worth I do think you've got the groundwork a longer project, if that is something that interests you.




*Heart*           EVER AFTER :: CONCLUSION           *Heart*
"Love is poison. A sweet poison, yes, but it will kill you all the same." -George R. R. Martin



I think the story had a lot of good elements. Although I'm not big on romance, you did something unique with this piece. While there were some areas I think could use some work, it's also worth noting that I don't have a lot of things I can compare it to, and it probably is one of the better romance pieces I've read for a long time.

Best of luck with the project, and let me know if you have any questions.

-Cat




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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
180
180
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)

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*Bat1* DISCLAIMER *Bat1*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Cat2* INTRODUCTION


Hello Flying Fox Author Icon,

Thanks so much for your formal review request of your item "Foxvalley Prologue & Chapter 1 re-edited" Open in new Window.. I always like seeing these requests come in and being exposed to work that I might not have found otherwise. That being said, let's get right into the review.

*Cat2* WHAT I LIKED:


*Cat* Detail

One of the first things that stood out to me about the piece was the high level of detail. You consistently had vivid descriptions throughout the writing which made the setting easy to picture and the characters feel much more realistic. It's something that I think is really important in all writing- but especially for genres like mysteries where the reader needs to be engaged in the environment you've created.


*Cat* Tone/Pacing

I did feel like there were times where the high level of detail did slow down the story, and while that is something I normally wouldn't like, it did really make me feel like I was reading a mystery. A downside that I personally find in the genre is that they do tend to burn a lot more slowly than other genres (like horror) that I'm used to reading. That's a personal preference though, and from a more objective standpoint I feel like you really captured the feel that you were going for in this piece.


*Cat2* MY SUGGESTIONS:


*Cat* Formatting

I noticed that the text was centered in the document - and while I don't think there's anything wrong with that, I did wonder if you had a reason for doing that? It was just a question that popped into my mind a couple times while I was reading, so I thought it would be worth mentioning.

*Cat* Moving Forward

The one overall drawback that I saw is something that could be a problem, but might not be.

I feel like I didn't really identify with any of the characters. Character development is an important part of any story, so that sounds bad, but it's hard to tell.

In the mystery stories I've read (and particularly the ones that I've enjoyed) I feel like the character development has been slow and steady, meaning that while I didn't necessarily identify with them at the beginning, I was very invested by the end. It's hard to see if that's going to be the case here having only read the prologue and the first chapter, but I thought it would be something I should mention so that you now characters are a good thing to focus on moving forward (if that wasn't already your plan - again, it's hard to tell having only read the beginning of a longer piece.)


*Cat2* CONCLUSION:


Mysteries are not my favorite genre, personally, but I think it's a genre that you've really captured the essence of. There's a lot of intrigue in your prologue and the vivid descriptions hold up to most of the mysteries I've read.

I hope that this review has been helpful, and that you keep up the great work!


-Cat


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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
181
181
Review of Damaged sight  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello Jimminycritic Author Icon ,

It's good to be reviewing you! *Smile*

I saw that your item "Damaged sight" Open in new Window. was featured in the most recent Horror/Scary newsletter and so I decided to drop by and give it a read. I hope that you don't mind me dropping by to leave you with my thoughts on the piece, since I'm all about Horror/Scary things.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Premise:

What I liked best about this piece was the premise. A nonbeliever working with magic to honor his fathers dying wishes is a great concept, and the fact that Bill is following through on that desire for his deceased father says a lot about his character - which is great because it gives the reader an attachment to him even though this is a very short story.

Great idea and great character technique.



*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


*Bats* Lengthen the Story


Although I think you did really great telling your story in such a short amount of time, I do think that the story might have worked better as a longer piece. The premise already lends itself to great sympathy for your main character, Bill, and I would have liked to see that built on a little more as his outlook starts to change. It also would have been really interesting to see more of his character through his relationship to his father - since that is what set the whole thing in motion.

There were also a lot of non-character points that it would have been nice to know more about, such as the spell, how he figures it all out, how it works - and generally just more in the moment details that tied the reader to the action of the story.

I think it would have been hard to work all of that in while keeping the story so short, but I also think there's a lot of interesting potential if you ever want to revisit this concept.


*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King


To wrap this all up, I like the story but I would have liked to see more of. The premise was great and Bill seemed very interesting, I just wish that I could have gotten a better insight into his character throughout the situation.

That being said, I'm very glad to have read the piece and I can see why it was included in the newsletter. Congratulations on the feature, and I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.

Sincerely,

-Cat

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
182
182
Review of What You Wish For  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello LdyPhoenix Author Icon ,

I found your item "What You Wish For" Open in new Window. thanks to it's feature in the most recent Horror/Scary newsletter. I hope that you don't mind me dropping by to leave you with my thoughts on the piece, being a lover of the genre.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Set Up:

I think you did a good job setting up the scene. It's very vivid despite not being very long, and I was able with how well established you were able to create the characters and and environment in such a short amount of time. It's good writing and it really adds to the overall effect of the piece.

*Bats* Subtly:

I like that you didn't spell out the ending. It requires a bit of thought and leaves some room for the reader to make their own interpretations not only of what exactly is happening at the conclusion, but what will follow. To elaborate just a tad more on my other point, I don't think that this type of ending would have worked so well if you hadn't set the piece up as well as you did.

All together, the elements worked greatly.


*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


*Bats* Pacing


The only thing that I think could be improved on is the pacing toward the end. The end itself I think is great, it moves along quickly which I think helps the impact, but I personally would have liked to see a little bit more tension in between the time that Marcus learns he has a competitor and the time that he wins. That would have made it feel like there was more of a conflict and the ending would have seemed all the more shocking.

Of course, that's just a suggestion. There is something to be said for the concise nature of story that you currently have implemented here. There are a lot of good aspects either way.


*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King



I hope that you enjoyed the review and that it was at least somewhat helpful. I liked reading the piece and I can definitely see why it was featured - congratulations on that by the way. It was an interesting story with some great set up, and I'm glad that I was given the opportunity to read it.

I wish you all the best with this and any other writing endeavors that you find yourself on.

Sincerely,

-Cat

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
183
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Review of The Last Eagles  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


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*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello Pennywise Author Icon,

I found your item "The Last Eagles" Open in new Window. thanks to its feature in the most recent edition of the Horror/Scary newsletter. I am a huge lover of the genre so I hope that you don't mind me dropping by to leave you with my thoughts on this piece.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Description:

What sticks out to me most about the piece was your descriptive style of writing and the very vivid imagery.

Some of my favorite lines include:

Each was a macabre mess of blood, sinew, flesh, and bone.


This is a more simple excerpt, but it captures that morbid confusion quite nicely.

And:

Dark blood poured copiously from the holes peppering his face, dripping from the slivers of skin hanging loosely around them.


A lot of people will tell you that horror shouldn't rely on gore, but I think you did a good job establishing the atmosphere and tension before moving onto this great line. With the other strong elements of your story in play I think lines like this really just added to the situation and were very effective.

*Bats* Final Line:

I like the repetition of the word "they" used in the story's conclusion. The short sentences brought focus to the action of the creatures and was a haunting note to end the piece on.


*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


*Bats* Link


I don't really have any suggestions for you. For a short piece of horror flash fiction this has just about everything that I'd like to see.

The only thing that I think would be worth drawing your attention to would be the fact the contest link in your annotation is invalid. I like that you included it, it provides some good context, but it might be worth taking a look at if the item is no longer valid.

Other than that I thought the story and presentation were both spot on. Great job!


*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King


I hope that you enjoyed my review as much as I enjoyed the story. It was a good piece of writing and I can see why it got its spot in the newsletter. I wish you the best of luck with all of your other writing endeavors and I'd be happy to read more of your work in the future.

Sincerely,

-Cat

*Web1*
*Web2*



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*Web3*
*Web4*


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184
184
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)

______________________________________________________________________



*Bat1* DISCLAIMER *Bat1*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


______________________________________________________________________






*Cat2* INTRODUCTION


Hello Whiskerface Author Icon,

I actually found your item "Advent Adversity Adventure Day 5" Open in new Window. through the most recent Horror/Scary newsletter, which I thought was a bit strange, but I'm glad to have read your piece all the same. I hope that you don't mind me dropping by to leave you with my thoughts on your writing.

*Cat2* WHAT I LIKED:


*Cat* Empowering

I like how you were able to write something that captured the tone of conquering ones problems so well. There's a little bit of pondering and uncertainty at the beginning, but by the end you found yourself asking all the right questions and seizing the power that you needed to take the future into your own hands.

*Cat* Honest

It seems like this came from a very honest place.

I personally don't have this level of faith, so at a face value I had some difficulty relating to the conclusion of the piece. That being said, I was truly impressed by how sincere and strong you are in your spiritual beliefs, and the fact that you're able to pull strength from that made for a great end to the piece. It also added a personal touch to this that made it something memorable and well worth looking over.

*Cat2* MY SUGGESTIONS:


I don't really have any suggestions for you on this.

There were one or two small details that gave me pause, things that I might have changed, but then I realized that this was a response to something.

If this was an article or an essay, I'd feel like there'd be a little bit of nitpicking to do, but the way that it's currently written makes it feel all the more like a genuine response.

If I did have one suggestion for you, it would be that you add a small annotation in there explaining the assignment, perhaps with a link to whatever event this is for, just to provide the readers with a little bit more context into what the piece is all about.



*Cat2* CONCLUSION:


I hope that this review has been somewhat helpful to you, even if I didn't make a lot of suggestions on improving it. What I really liked about it was the raw, honest energy that it had and that's something in writing that can't really be taught.

I'm glad to have read your piece and I hope that it was as good to write as it was to read.

Sincerely,

-Cat


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______________________________________________________________________


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185
185
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)

______________________________________________________________________



*Bat1* DISCLAIMER *Bat1*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


______________________________________________________________________






*Cat2* INTRODUCTION


Hello Stuck in the mire ~BlueAsIce Author Icon ,

I found your item "Invalid Item" Open in new Window. in the request thread and thought that I would drop by to leave you with some of my thoughts. So let's get right into it, shall we?

*Cat2* WHAT I LIKED:


*Cat* Then There Were None

Something that I have always really liked is the "Then there were none" styles of poems. The sing-songy pattern coupled with the usually morbid content of the poems pairs incredibly well together and has always been one of my favorite styles of poetry.

While a lot of what I like about the poem boils down to the type of poem your writing, I think it's worth mentioning that you did it very well. You worked within the premise to make a unique poem that captures the tone and rhythm that you were looking for very effectively.

Really, really fantastic job.

*Cat2* MY SUGGESTIONS:


*Cat* Read Aloud

The one thing that I would suggest is that you read the poem aloud to yourself to see if there are any instances where the rhythm seems off, or if there are too many syllables in a line. There were one or two instances where it did feel like I had to rush a little to keep up the steady rhythm.

For example:

Eight little Princesses praying up to heaven,
A Guardian went and took one and then there were seven.



I feel like the second line here was a little lengthier than would be ideal for the flow of the poem.

An alternative might look like this:

Eight little Princesses praying up to heaven,
A Guardian took one and then there were seven.

The one bad thing about using this style/format of poem is that it really does only take one extra syllable to make the whole thing sound off - but reading your poem aloud is something that can really, really help you find any areas that might need work. That's something that's a little tricky with this medium, but overall I think you did a really good job.

*Cat* Eliminations

The one other thing that nagged at me a little bit is that some of the princesses that seemed to get eliminated quite a bit easier than the others.

For example a sprained ankle or being ashamed doesn't seem nearly as bad as being burned or digging ones own grave. Those were the only two that I felt really lacked the impact of the others, but I thought it would be worth mentioning.


*Cat2* CONCLUSION:


Overall I thought the poem was very enjoyable and I think you're off to a really great start with it. I think with just a tad more polishing it will be a very haunting piece and I'd love to see what you do with the rest of the project. I hope that the review was helpful and if you need or want to talk about the piece more, feel free to PM me.


-Cat


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186
186
Review of Painted Rock  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Web1*
*Web2*



______________________________________________________________________





*Spider* DISCLAIMER *Spider*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.


______________________________________________________________________


*Web3*
*Web4*





*Bat2*          ALL ALONE :: INTRODUCTION           *Bat1*

"From even the greatest horrors, irony is seldom absent." - H.P. Lovecraft


Hello Fivesixer Author Icon,

I hope you don't mind me dropping by to review your item "Painted Rock" Open in new Window.. I'm always looking for new horror stories to review - especially this time of year, and I saw that this one was featured in one of the more recent newsletters so I thought I'd give it a read.





*Bat2*           IN THE DARK :: WHAT I LIKED           *Bat1*
"Terror is the desire to save yourself, but horror is rooted in sympathy." -Joe Hill


*Bats* Tone:

What I liked best about this story was definitely how unique it was. The plot plays off of a lot of horror tropes, but the tone has a bit of levity to it that makes the story feel fresh and prevents the audience from trying to take it too seriously, even as the tension starts building toward the end.

On a related note, I think that the names really helped sell the quirky, unique nature of the story. "Pickle" "Pear" and "Bug" are all very one of a kind character names, but the one that really stuck with me was actually "cuddleshmuck" as the name of the park. I liked it because it sounds a little ridiculous, but was weirdly effective as it almost instantly brought to mind names of similar make-out locations in older horror flicks that play out very similarly to this story.

The whole thing was just very strange, and that makes it all the more memorable, something that I think is vital to horror fiction.

*Bats* Dialogue:

This also is an extension of the first thing, but I really appreciated that you had a distinct manner of speech for your characters that blended in so well to both the premise and the setting. A lot of scary dialogue strikes me as very unauthentic, but the only time I felt even a little that was when Pear said "OMG" three times back to back - and that's only because I've always felt like it's easier to chant "Oh my god" multiple times than "OMG" *Laugh*




*Bat2*          SOUND OF SCREAMING :: MY SUGGESTIONS:           *Bat1*
"Horror is the removal of masks." - Robert Bloch


This isn't really a suggestion so much as it is a question:

*Bats* Significance


What is the significance of the letter P? I know that question is asked in the story, and it isn't answered in context because they realize that the letter wasn't painted on by Bug. I felt like there was a significance to the letter that spooked the characters though, I just didn't catch what it was.





*Bat2*           WAKING FROM A NIGHTMARE :: CONCLUSION           *Bat1*
"We make up horrors to help us deal with the real ones." - Stephen King



Aside from the one question I had, I really liked the story. It was an interesting little tale that incorporated elements I was used to into something new entirely. I really enjoyed it, and can see why it made the newsletter.

Best of luck in Quills this year!

-Cat

*Web1*
*Web2*



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*Web3*
*Web4*


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187
187
Review of Procrastination.  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy Account Anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This is yet another piece that I could relate to a little too well, but it was a lot of fun to read.

Procrastination is such a common problem, and you wrote about it in a way that we could see so many insights into your life. Not only was it interesting, but it was a great way to connect to your reader. We got to hear about the specific things that distract you, and you had little hints about a manuscript in there. It was a good illustration of how grand ideas for projects can gradually become easier to overlook in the sea of mundane life things.

I also like that you included another narration video for this one, that's such a fun thing and that next step really shows how invested you are in your work.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't have any suggestions for you on this one, I think it's great as is.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I have so much fun reading the stuff on your port. I'm so glad that this event brought me to your work, because I have sincerely had a great time doing reviews for you today. Thanks for making this year's first anniversary bash one to remember!

All the best,

Cat

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188
188
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy Account Anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was a fun poem.

As someone who typically associated Valentine's Day with tragedy, I was expecting this piece to be a lot more depressing than it was. Even though I figured out early on in the poem what exactly you were referring to by your "true love" I still was expecting the tone of poem to be dark or depressing.

That wasn't the case, and despite the crying emoticon at the end of the poem, I found that I was highly amused by the time I had read the final line.

This had a lot of unexpected humor, and it might be one of my all time favorite Valentine's Day poems about a love that I can 100% relate to.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't think this piece warrants any suggestions from me. You did a great job *Heart*


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



To wrap up this review, I'm a cynic, but this warmed my heart in a very chocolaty way. Thank you for sharing this wonderful Valentine's day piece, I'm glad to see that it took a well deserved first place ribbon (and one in a very appropriate color, I might add.)

It's been a pleasure as always.

-Cat

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189
189
Review of Life's Lighthouse  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy Account Anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This to me was a good balance of well-rounded life thoughts and religion-specific thoughts. There were a lot of feelings about life expressed that don't require strong religious ties to relate to, especially in the first verse. You also do a good job of expressing the religious reviews as a Christian narrator for this piece, and you get across the concept of religious salvation without being too alienating for non-Christians such as myself.

It's also important that this does feel like this is from the heart, a major aspect considering what contest this was for. I can see why this won first place.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only area that I thought could have used a little work was the meter. On paper it was fine, but reading it out loud I was underwhelmed by the way that the piece sounded. Perhaps that's just how I read it and this would be a good poem for you to add a narration for.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Although the meter did sound off to me, the sentiments behind the poem were expressed very well and clearly. Congratulations on another contest win, it was well earned.

Sincerely,

Cat


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190
190
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was the only poem of yours I've reviewed that I didn't have to read first, because you provided a great video where you read it to me!

I'm kidding, of course. I actually didn't even see the video until I had read the poem. I did think that the video was a fantastic touch, however, and it's really neat that you put that in there. In fact, I think I actually got more out of the poem having it read to me, so thanks for including that!

This was a well-crafted, emotional poem and it has a really good sound to it. It's very consistent, and I think the metaphor was perfect.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I do have a suggestion, not for the piece but for you, generally. If you enjoyed doing the video, that might be a great way to get more traction for your writing. If you started up a narration channel, I'm sure there are a lot of people who could find your work that way. It's something to consider at least, if you haven't already thought about it.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I thought this was a great poem and a great poem narration. I hope the review has been helpful!

Sincerely,

Cat


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191
191
Review of Apocalypse  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


The strongest element of the poem for me was the stance that you took on various end of the world theories. The fact that you don't get wrapped up in outlandish ideas about how the world will end draws even more attention to the more immanent threat to the planet.

The way that you went about introducing the idea behind this poem was a little roundabout, but overall very effective.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only thing I would suggest is that you consider revisiting this idea as a longer poem.

The reason why I think this might be better as something longer is because I think the impact of the theories not scaring you as much as reality would have a stronger impact if the end of the world theories were a little more coherent. The way that they're written right now seems a little random and gives the impression of being forced.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This was a good piece. It made me think, it brought attention to reality, and hopefully more people will read it and be inspired to be less selfish. We need a lot of change if we're going to avoid the end of the world.

Sincerely,

Cat


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192
192
Review of Miguel's Duty  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I loved the detail and the intense characterization focus on this. The story was a little piece of Miguel's life, and I felt like I really got to know him in that short span of time, and that I got a good feel for who he was as a person.

There was also something in there that struck me as very powerful:

He didn't have much faith in his fragile, crippled body, but he remembered Jesus once said that you only needed faith the size of a mustard seed to move mountains. Surely, he could scrape together that much confidence. Surely, he could survive a little longer. Surely, he could rise again just one more time.


I thought this was a beautiful section. I often find myself with less faith than the average person, often with no faith at all, but I really loved the determination emanating from this excerpt, and I think it did a great job showing Miguel's confidence.





*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't have any suggestions for you for this one, either.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Although I'm not typically one for the special agent story, this was beautifully written and you did such a good show introducing Miguel to your audience. Really, really fantastic job.

Sincerely,

Cat


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193
193
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



This was very chaotic.

For a story that's only 2,000 words this piece really takes the audience on a wild ride, I have to admit. It was unexpected and it really kept me on my toes. I liked the political commentary, although it was a bit strange, and I liked that it wasn't overly obvious.

Chris Burke also seems like he is quite the character, and I have a feeling that I'd like to learn more about him, his religion, and the material he works on.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



Like with the zombie story, I felt like this one was paced a little too quickly. While that helps to accurately capture the feeling of the chaos surrounding the situation, I do prefer the stories that focus a little more on the characters and how they react emotionally to these sort of speculative scenarios.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this review has been somewhat helpful to you. This wasn't my favorite of your stories, but like everything on your portfolio it was engaging and the premise gave me a lot to think about.

Sincerely,

Cat


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194
194
Review of I Like Marigolds  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I liked the piece overall. I like the bold actions that Glenda takes to try and help alleviate the worse of the women's suffering in her family. She is a very interesting character, and in her own way, very brave. Although I would have liked to see her take a bit more action, especially when it came to the children, I think trying to forgive her for that is part of what makes this piece so interesting - and it's not exactly like she can be blamed, considering how she grew up.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only thing is that I would have liked to understand Glenda's motivations a little bit more. For as interesting as her actions were, I feel like everything she did (and how she went about doing it) opened up about a million questions, none of which were answered.

A little bit of mystery can be a great thing in fiction, but some more insight might have been really helpful in this instance.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that the review was helpful. This was an interesting concept, and a great, multi-dimensional character who I didn't really understand *Laugh* In all seriousness though, she did get me thinking, and that's a great thing for a character to do.

Sincerely,

Cat

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195
195
Review of Croix de Guerre  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I really liked this one. I feel like it didn't tell a complete story, but it made for a fascinating bit of insight into the lives of a few characters. The setting was vivid, the dialogue was believable, and the priest had a very warming change of heart.


Of course, my favorite character was Henri. He had a small part, but it was very important and I like that he was included.

I also loved the annotations with the source links! I haven't followed them yet, but I intend to and I sincerely thank you for including them. These are exactly the kind of historical basis links that I like to see included in works like this.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*




I suggest that you don't change anything, unless of course you decide at some point later to continue the project, or do a spin off piece about Henri.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This was another gem in your portfolio, and I'm very glad to have found it. It's different from your other work, but you write such a wide variety of things that I suppose that could be said about many of your pieces.

Thank you for sharing this.

Sincerely,

Cat


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196
196
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I liked that you didn't waste a lot of time in letting Bobby figure out that Ken was a vampire. It was fairly obvious, and with a piece this short having too much set up could have been a fatal flaw.

Additionally I like the idea of a super sweet, awkward, vampire character. Bobby is the exact opposite of the problem with vampire fiction, and I think part of me actually wants to read more about him. I was surprised when his heart was broken at the end, not that a spur of the moment vampire romance didn't work out, but that I felt so bad for him. That's some very good writing there.

You also didn't take the concept too seriously, which is nice. I liked the levity you brought to the piece.

I think the line “Do me now, big boy. I wanna live forever!" should replace "Hang tight, spider monkey" in the vampire genre dialogue hall of fame (and I didn't have to sit through an hour of terrible acting to get to it, which makes it all the more enjoyable)



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I do not have any suggestions for you on this one.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



There's not a lot more for me to say about this one, other than it was fun and I hope I get to see more things like this before I run out of items in your portfolio for you anniversary bash.

Sincerely,

Cat

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197
197
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This seems like quite the contest entry, and there is just so much going on here considering that it's only 2000 words long. It is without a doubt one of the most interesting Christmas stories I've ever read, and in a weird way one of the best terminator crossovers I've ever read. (That's a sentence I didn't ever think I'd say.)

In all seriousness though, you did a good job with the satirical nature of the story and made some good allusions to the source material. Despite being a strange combination of worlds, you managed to find a unique tone that did justice to Christmas stories and Skynet.

I particularly liked the final line, perhaps a bit obvious but the reference suits the tone well.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only suggestion I have for this one is that you consider annotating it further. A wild piece like this could maybe use a bit more context about the prompt, and it's always nice to see characters credited in crossovers.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This was an interesting holiday tale with some very on-the-nose commentary. Thank you for sharing it.

Sincerely,

Cat


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198
198
Review of The Treasure Map  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


Once again, you have made some wonderful references. Who among us hasn't been a little more inclined to look for hidden treasure or follow strange maps after playing a Tomb Raider game?

I particularly liked the ending of this one. Like most of your stories it took a dark and unexpected turn that was as entertaining as it was disturbing. I liked that the character used pre-conceived notions to his advantage in his situation with Samantha, just as you used them to your advantage to surprise the reader. Very nice.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The one thing that I would have liked to have seen would have been more literary references. We know what crime show Samantha likes and what video game she preferred playing in college, but not a lot about her reading preferences, which is something I always like to know from characters who are English majors.

Other than that, I thought it was very good.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Reference nitpicking aside, I really enjoyed the story. Your writing keeps me on my toes and I'm glad that I get to read so much of it for this event.

Sincerely,

Cat


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199
199
Review of Tanya  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



This was so interesting. I could sort of see the general direction that the story was heading in, but it took some interesting turns that I didn't see coming. Thank goodness that the protagonist was so brave, right? Otherwise it might have had a really unfortunate ending.

I also like the way that you're able to work random bits of trivia so seamlessly into your work. I knew that Arthur Conan Doyle believed in fairies and I knew that League of Legends championship players could make millions of dollars, but I didn't know that I'd ever be reading a story that included both of those facts. It shows that you have a lot of knowledge on strange topics and that you're able to turn that knowledge into interesting and diverse characters.

Now,be honest; Did you ever try to get good enough to play professional League of Legends? *Laugh*


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't really think this piece needs my help, is was very entertaining.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Another wonderful and unexpected story from you. Thanks for sharing!

Sincerely,

Cat


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200
200
Review of The Librarian  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


There were a lot of things to like about this piece; unique dialogue, good character chemistry, interesting dynamics, realistic situations, etc. but what I'd really like to address is my favorite aspect of the piece.

I loved the representation.

There just aren't enough stories about the LGBTQ community. So many of the romance short stories revolving around gay characters are solely about the character being gay and the struggles that they have to go through. This story was just like a normal romance story, except for it happened to be about two women - and I loved that.

I'm usually not into romance genre stories, but I really liked this one and I'm glad to see there are talented writers who are writing about adorable lesbian couples.





*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I would suggest that you write more stuff like this *BigSmile*


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



This was a good romance piece. It wasn't over the top, the chemistry good, I could feel Jess's emotions rise and fall throughout the story, and again, I thought it was great lesbian representation. Great job!

Sincerely,

Cat

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