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1,115 Public Reviews Given
1,116 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Versatile: I'm good at reviewing different types of writing in different ways. Honest: While I do my best to be honest and encouraging in reviews, I don't omit things. If I tell you I like something about a piece, you can trust that I'm not just saying it. All-Inclusive/Well-Rounded: I look for the good and bad in writing. I'll give you an overall opinion as well as the highlights and what needs worked on.
I'm good at...
Giving feedback within set parameters. If you're looking to receive opinions on something specific, let me know and that's what I'll focus on when giving a review.
Favorite Genres
Horror - all time favorite. Science Fiction and Fantasy are tied in a close second.
Least Favorite Genres
Romance. (Exceptions: Dark erotica intrigues me if it's, you know, dark.) I will happily read and review romance pieces, but I might be a little tougher on it than on other genres.
Favorite Item Types
Static Book/Collections.
Least Favorite Item Types
N/A
I will not review...
N/A I'll review anything. If for some reason you don't think I'll want to, feel free to email me with your concerns before submitting a request.
Public Reviews
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201
201
Review of Tom's Birthday  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was another great dystopia piece, and it was a concept that offers a lot of interesting things to think about. Like the other dystopia story I read by you, this is easy to fall into, it's engaging, it makes enough sense as to offer a creeping feeling of possibility, and it makes you think. It's different enough from the other piece however to show that you have a good range as a writer, even when working within the same specific sub-genre.

I also like how you were able to capture a feeling of history for the environment being described without dumping a lot of history lessons into the story or bogging down the plot with exposition. You spread hints evenly throughout the story, which works great in this short format.

*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I think this piece is great as is, though I must admit I would be interested to see a longer dystopian story from you, based off of how good the short ones are.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


It has been a pleasure to read this, and I'm looking forward to reading more of your short stories - particularly the dark science fiction ones, which I hope there are more of.

Sincerely,

Cat


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202
202
Review of Malaco Malone  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I liked how much of the exposition you were able to show through dialogue in this piece. That's something that usually feels forced, but all of the conversations in this piece seem very natural and so you pulled it off quite nicely. It spells out what's happening, it introduces good twists, and it kept the story moving along at a great pace from beginning to end.

And again, I liked your subject matter. It was dark, it was surprising, and you were able to entertain while covering darker concepts that a lot of writers would be hesitant to approach. It's a piece that makes the audience think, and sends chills.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only thing that I would suggest is that you try to work just a bit more urgency into the words of the doctor who calls in. Although he's able to provide vital plot information very quickly, he seems a bit too formal and collected considering the urgency of the situation.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Overall I thought it was a great piece that was very captivating. I'm glad to have read it, and I look forward to reviewing you again.

Sincerely,

Cat


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203
203
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy Account Anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was quite the dilemma that Jim McCall is facing there in this story, and you were able to work quite a lot into such a short piece of fiction. There was drama, there was character development, moral implications, social commentary, villains, good-guys, imperfect protagonists, and even a pretty unexpected plot twist. Just in terms of quantity, I'm quite impressed.

I also have to admit that I'm pretty impressed with the decision that McCall makes at the end, an unthinkable act indeed. I think it's interesting to reflect that (assuming he survives this) he will spend the rest of his life haunted by his decision to do what objectively was the right thing.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only suggestion I have would be to consider lengthening this piece. Although you were able to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time, I feel like more characterization and a slower build up would have, in this instance, allowed you to enhance the story and the dilemma that your main character faces at the end.

Then again, I always do seem to prefer longer fiction.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I was very impressed by this story, and I'm looking forward to reading more of your work.

Sincerely,

Cat


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204
204
Review of Samoset's Journey  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



This was interesting. It was definitely different from the others I've read thus far, both in tone and content. It's a little sad from a historical standpoint, but the great characterization of Samoset does give a more optimistic insight into the nature of humanity.

There was one line in particular that I really liked;

Obnoxious foreigners or not, the English were people.


It's a simple enough line, but it carries with it a concept that seems hard for so many to grasp when waging war with another party. We're all just people. This is the kind of line that really makes a piece feel powerful.

I also really enjoyed that he starts referring to the girl as "Sunset." A small detail, but one that I really enjoyed.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't really have any suggestions for you on this one, I think you did a great job and were able to accomplish quite a lot in under 1000 words.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Again, it has been a pleasure reading your work and I am looking forward to the next story in the folder.

Sincerely,

Cat


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205
205
Review of Anime Hamster  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I have to admit, the premise didn't have me sold on this one at first - not being a huge fan of school stories or dating bets.

However, what really sold me on this was the references. The comic-con one seemed a bit obvious, but I loved the character commentary for the Hunger Games (especially the choices of characters you used to make comparisons to) and it's hard for me not to identify with anyone who feels passionately about Scott Pilgrim.

There was a lot of geeky fun in this, and that's something I really appreciated.

*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The overall concept of this story wasn't my favorite, but that comes down mostly to my own preferences.

The only concrete suggestion that I have for you is that you try to cut back on how often you say "Daniels" when he's first introduced, I felt like his name was in there an abundance of times.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This was a solid piece, and there were plenty of things to enjoy even if it wasn't my favorite. It was still a lot of fun, and it sounds like you have some great geekdom tastes.

All the best,

Cat


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206
206
Review of Harry the Hamster  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



This was such a cute story!

Although I must admit that I didn't like it as much as the darker pieces I've read by you, it was entertaining and I had a lot of fun with. The animal lover in me just can't resist tales of heroic animals, I suppose, especially not ones that are as cute as the hamster up in the cover image.

It's also nice that it wasn't entirely devoid of darker material, the commentary about animal experimentation and the government created plague was more than enough to give this story a bit of an edge.




*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I don't really have any suggestions for this one. The pacing was faster than some of your other work, and perhaps a little faster than I typically prefer, but for a piece with a lighter tone like this I don't think that's too much of an issue.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


To wrap this up this was another enjoyable piece that I'm glad to have read, and Harry is a hamster that I'm very glad to have met. I'm looking forward to reviewing your next story very much.

Sincerely,

Cat


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207
207
Review of A Good Heart  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy Account Anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I liked the slow build up and the subtle foreshadowing. Although there were a few lines that tipped me off to Matthew's true intentions, they were balanced out by more innocent suggestions that kept me guessing right up until the sedative.

There was also a great amount of characterization for Matthew, considering how short the story is. The several references to Egyptian culture show his devotion to his area of study but don't feel forced, and don't overshadow his primal desires that serve as his motivation. He comes across as a well-rounded character which makes the read even more fascinating.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only complaint that I had about this story would be that the ending felt a bit rushed. Perhaps it's just me being cynical, but the way that things worked out tested my suspension of disbelief as everything turns south for a monster very quickly and with some convenient timing. I understand that this was probably just to avoid drawing the ending out, however.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


Aside from some misgivings about the end, I did enjoy the story. It was dark, the characters were believable, and I'm glad to have found it.

Sincerely,

Cat


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208
208
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Christopher Roy Denton Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. Happy account anniversary!


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


There wasn't really anything about this story that I didn't like.

A chilling concept, a dystopia loosely inspired by scientific inevitability, and an end that puts the rest of what we've read into a somewhat disturbing perspective as the wholesome family picture is irreparably shaken. This was a fantastic story that I'm glad to have read.

The way that you've set up such a great focus on the characters works well, not just to make the ending more surprising but to earn the reader's investment in the situation without dumping too much information about the outside world on them. What we learn of your setting is seen naturally and the audience must put the pieces together for themselves - a very effective method of writing such short, dystopian fiction.




*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*




I would highly suggest that you don't change a single thing.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This was a fantastic story, and I'm glad to have read it. I'm looking forward to reviewing much more of your work on this special WdC day.

Sincerely,

Cat Voleur


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209
209
Review of The Jump  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello willwilcox ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window.. (Hope you don't mind me dropping in again, I got more assigned more adventure reviews today *Laugh* )


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



You start right at a very exciting point by letting your audience immediately aware of the danger involved in this situation. You didn't waste any time getting the exciting stuff.

More than anything, I liked the end. I guess I just read too much fiction online, but there was this part of me that, despite all logic, expected he'd still make it somehow and everything would work out. The fact that it didn't was, in a sad way, more enjoyable as it added a layer of eye-opening realism (not to mention it really validated the sense of tension that the reader felt building throughout the story.)

The piece tied together and makes for an excellent piece of short fiction that I'm glad to have read.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*




I don't have any suggestions for you, I really don't think this piece needs any. *Smile*

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that you enjoyed my review, just as I enjoyed your story. As always, it has been a pleasure reading your work and I look forward to the next time this event sends me in the direction of your portfolio.

Sincerely,

Cat

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210
210
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello şђάđe Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was an interesting begin to a fantasy epic, and killing off two of the four adventurers right in the prologue is a bold move, I bet there are many exciting things ahead. You were also very vivid in your scenery descriptions, which I think is great for something of this genre.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



My main suggestion would be that you focus on character development more. The prologue is very, very short and while you gave a good sense of what the characters look like, I feel like I didn't really know who any of them are, and it made me feel detached from what was happening.

I think focusing more on their personalities would help readers become more invested, and evoke more of an emotional response when your characters die. It would also make that all the more shocking, and there would be more anticipation for the next chapter.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this review has been helpful to you, and I wish you all the best in writing your story. Fantasy is one of the most ambitious genres to write in and it's hard to find a good balance, but with action like this I believe you can find it.

All the best,

Cat


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211
211
Review of My childhood  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Toney Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



You seem to have had a very interesting, very colorful life. I was impressed with the level of detail you were able to include, and the vividness in which are able to remember all the aspects of your childhood.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I would suggest including why you're writing this in the introduction, rather than just in the conclusion so that people become invested early on in the piece.

Additionally, I would suggest you go through and do some basic editing. The story of your life is interesting, and the best way to share it with the most people is to polish the presentation as much as possible. I noticed some typos and things that I'm sure would be easy fixes. For example, your conclusion:


I hope you have enjoyed my life story od my childhod. I hope I didn't affened anyone. If I did I am truely sorry, it was not my intension. I was tought to always tell the truth so I am!!!


Editing the section, it would look a bit more like this:

I hope you have enjoyed the story of my childhood. I hope I didn't offend anyone. If I did I am truly sorry, it was not my intention. I was taught to always tell the truth, so I am.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that the review has been helpful, and I wish you all the best of luck with your writing.

Sincerely,

Cat

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212
212
Review of Inevitable truth  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Tanisha mahajan Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I like the title, it really draws people in.

I also like that you were able to convey such deep thoughts and emotions so concisely. A lot of poems that are written with this tone seem to ramble on for awhile, but you were very to the point and it's something that I think works really well for this piece.

There was one line in the middle that really stood out to me:

Time to prove existence
You can step back of fear of failure


Something about it just really struck a chord with me.

*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



My only suggestion would be that you try to edit the piece a little bit, and clean it up so that it looks a bit more polished. For example changing "ur" to "your" and "heart emotions" to "heart's emotions."

There was also a line that I'm not sure I understood:


Need is only to bhe + ve and carm


Other than that, I thought it was great.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this has been helpful, and I'm glad that I stumbled across your poem for my event. I wish you all the best with this and any future writing.

Sincerely,

Cat


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213
213
Review of Random thoughts  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Lulu Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I liked that you took the time just to share some random thoughts - and that they were all dated. It's like seeing little excerpts from someone's journal - bits of fascinating, out-of-context insight into the mind of the writer.

The thoughts were all also phrased very poetically, which I can appreciate as a writer. In fact, this item doesn't look too different from my own brainstorming journal, an it was interesting to see someone elses notes like this.

Thank you for sharing.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The one thing that I would suggest is a little bit more annotation (perhaps even in a different color) that explains why you chose these thoughts specifically, or what you wrote them down for initially - just a tiny bit of context.

Another thing that would be really cool further down the road would be to do a book item, with an introduction about what inspires you to write down these musings, and then each entry could be a new, random thought.

Just something to consider.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that you liked the review, as I liked your piece. Keep thinking strange things and keep writing!

Sincerely,

Cat

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214
214
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Tori Autumn Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


More than anything I liked the message of this piece. The golden rule is something that I think more people should follow, and it was nice to see that there are good people who are so passionate about it.

You did a good job including outside sources as well as sharing your own personal experiences with the golden rule, and you made a passionate case for why people should be more courteous and respectful to one another.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only suggestion I have would be that you re-structure the piece a little bit, and play around with how you organize your ideas. The material is all great, but the piece sort of bounces back and forth between styles and ideas. Giving the piece a more traditional essay structure might help highlight the ideas you're expressing and make your intention even more clear and effective.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this review has been helpful to you, just as the article was helpful to me. Seeing wonderful sentiments conveyed in writing helps restore some of my faith in humanity, and I thank you for sharing this wonderful piece.

Sincerely,

Cat


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215
215
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Joshua Klaz Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



It's very cool that you were willing to share your school project here with us on Writing.Com. The language used for the dialogue was incredibly unique and the tone that the story was written in is a fun take on older works of fantasy.

The combination of plot, dialogue, and tone make for a truly one-of-a-kind story here, and I can see why your class enjoyed it so much.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*




I do have a couple suggestions. In the annotation it might be a good idea to mention what exactly the assignment was for the school project, because I must admit I'm having a tough time picturing that, and it might help to provide some additional context for the piece.

Additionally, you might want to take a look at the formatting, indenting new paragraphs or adding lines of space between them would be a great way to make the piece more presentable to readers online.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope this review has been helpful. Your piece was very entertaining and I'm glad that I stumbled across it in my event. Hopefully you're still writing plenty, and I wish you the best of luck with it.

Sincerely,

Cat


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216
216
Review of Spanking  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello bob county Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


This was one of the most unusual things that I've ever stumbled across on this site.

The tale is very personal, a little bit uncomfortable, with just the faintest edge of disturbing, but it was well written and very gripping.

It's the sort of thing that I'm sure a lot of people can relate to in one way or another, but it's seldom that one seems someone writing about the roots of fetishes, particularly so far back into childhood. Still, it was an interesting concept and you went about it very vividly to leave a distinct impression in the minds of readers, myself included.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



This isn't a suggestion so much as a note, but the formatting for this piece was very unusual. In fact, I thought it was a poem before I actually started reading it because of the way that it's laid out. I'm not sure if that's intentional or not, but it is a little strange.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that you enjoyed the review, and I thank you for sharing your work with the site. This is definitely the strangest piece that I've read tonight and it's one I don't think I'll be forgetting any time soon.

Sincerely,

Cat


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217
217
Review of Tea and Blossoms  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Kotaro Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



What a pleasure to be reviewing you again.

I really liked how quickly you got to the action in this piece, you're able to go very quickly into the thick of things from the beginning of your story and there really isn't a dull moment to follow. This is packed with exciting moments all the way through, and that's something that not a lot of stories can claim.

I also liked the existential nature of the ending, it was a little abstract and very poetic. It wrapped everything up while still leaving the reader with questions, and I really like how it made me think.

Great job!


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only thing I think this story was missing was character development. I like that we get to see the character dynamics more than we're told about them, but I am someone who prefers just a tad more exposition than what this had, especially early on in the story.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



Aside from wanting to see more insight into your characters, I thought the story was great and I enjoyed it. I hope that I get to read some more of your work soon, and that you don't mind getting all these reviews from me.

Sincerely,

Cat

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218
218
Review of The Beast  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



This was impressive.

I did a similar challenge once and it was an absolute nightmare trying to weed out all of the multiple syllable words - and by the time I was done my story barely even made any sense, and every single sentence felt forced.

I am incredibly impressed by how natural this story reads and I know first hand just how difficult that must have been to accomplish - not to mention how engaging the premise is.

You have done an excellent job in completing this challenge, and this is a piece that definitely deserves to be praised.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I really don't have any suggestions. I am a bit in awe of this piece, actually, and I wouldn't change a thing. The rhythm is a bit strange, but I think that's what happens when you only use one syllable words, and like I said before it flows so much more naturally that I would have expected.

Very, very well done.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


This piece has been a pleasure to read and review. I am impressed by your ability to complete difficult challenges, and I look forward to the next time I get to review you.

Sincerely,

Cat


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219
219
Review of Please, Not Alone  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Shadowspawn Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I thought this was an interesting story. It had a unique tone that made it feel like it was an amalgamation of many different genres, which was quite memorable.

The work ethic of the main character (along with his history and moral compass) make him easy to empathize with, especially in his current plight. His desire not to die alone touches on a universal fear I think, and it was yet another thing that made it easy for the audience to connect and become further invested in his experiences.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



My only suggestion would be a little bit of editing. I noticed that words get sort of clumped up together where they get used many times in a short space. In the earlier paragraphs the word "side" is used many times together and further down the word "coffee" seems to be very bunched up.

That's nitpicking, I know, but it was just a small thing that could be fixed quickly.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this review has been helpful. I enjoyed the story and I thank you for sharing. I wish you all the best with this and any future writing endeavors.

Sincerely,

Cat


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220
220
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Riina Author Icon,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I like the premise, and I like that you carry on the story to include an internet cafe, which seems like a logical next direction for the story to take.

What I found most impressive about the piece was how you were able to match the tone of the writing in the section you were given, it reads very fluently almost as if the entire thing was written by the same person from the first section to the next, and the fact that you were able to mirror that style so well is awesome.

Great work!



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I do have a couple quick suggestions. The first is a little bit of editing, re-formatting. There were just a couple of typos and the new paragraphs would look a little cleaner if they were indented or had lines of space between them.

My other suggestion is in regards to the end, which I didn't like. The "to be continued" just didn't work well for me, especially considering that this is an assignment - wrapping the story up might have been better (at least in my opinion.)

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that this review was somewhat helpful. Although I would have liked to see an end, I was very impressed with the style of writing, and this was a pleasure to read.

Sincerely,

Cat

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221
221
Review of Ghost Train  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello Wenston Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I liked the pacing of this story a lot. The slow build up really lets the reader feel every bit of tension throughout the story as the sound of the train draws ever closer.

It had good characters, a strong plot, and it was so filled with unease - I loved it. Being a big fan of the horror genre, the way that you were able to stretch out Jesse's feelings of fright throughout the story is just something that really appealed to me, and I was very impressed by your ability to do so.

I was surprised to find something this spooky with an action/adventure tag, but it was definitely a good surprise.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I really don't have any suggestions for this one. Every word contributed something to the story, it's well-written and it seems to have been nicely polished. Great job!


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that you enjoyed the review, as I enjoyed your story. This concept was well executed and it's a tale that I'm sure will be sticking with me for some time. It has been a pleasure reading your work, and I wish you all the best in all of your writing endeavors.

Sincerely,

Cat


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222
222
Review of TALL TALE  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


You definitely seem to have good grasp of the sailing language - that's for sure. I feel like you did a really great job getting into the mind of your character and you gave a very authentic, sea-story vibe to the audience. I almost felt like I was there listening to someone brag as I was reading this, and it does seem like a very tall tale indeed.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The one thing that I wasn't sure about was the talk of feminine conquests at the beginning of the story. On the one hand, it said a lot about your character and the boasting definitely seems congruent with the "boasting fisherman" persona. On the other hand, it wasn't really relevant to the story, and there was a lot of it in there. It made me like the character less, which I suppose could go either way depending on what exactly you're going for here.

In any case, I thought it would be worth mentioning.

*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



This was an interesting tale, and you did a good job writing it like it was being told to your audience. I had fun reviewing it, and I thank you for sharing your work here with the site.

Sincerely,

Cat

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223
223
Review of Desert Sands  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*


I was impressed by how well you seem to have the tone of a western. Not being a big fan of westerns, that's something that I have never quite been able to accomplish, but I can recognize that skill when I see it.

The character, setting, and action all have that distinct, western feel. The tone helps put the reader into the environment and it felt very consistent all the way through your story.



*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



The only thing I'd really suggest is that you try to edit out a few instances of saying that you're on your way to help a friend. That's something that was laid out pretty well in the exposition, and then it becomes a bit redundant because the phrase is used numerous times throughout the rest of the story. It's even in the description, and it just seemed a bit too repetitive after that, at least that's what I thought.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that this review was at least a little helpful, although I don't possess your prowess with the genre. You've done a good job telling a western tale here and it was a pleasure to review this story.

Sincerely,

Cat


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224
224
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*

Hello beherebrook ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



I liked the subject matter, and that you wrote about something that you really experienced. As much as I like fiction, there is something really cool about reading a story and knowing that the narrator has actually done those things - it just feels so authentic.

It was also interesting to read about the trip, it sounds like it was such an amazing experience. I can definitely see the appeal, and I bet it was worth all the hassle that it took to get there.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



My only suggestion would be that you break the last paragraph up into two paragraphs. Although they'll both be relatively small paragraphs, I think it would bring better emphasis to a great line in your story:

We all laughed, knowing that this experience needed no explanation


I really liked that line and think it would make a good end of the paragraph.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*



I hope that this review has been somewhat helpful. Thank you so much for sharing your work, it was very neat reading about your experience at the feet of giants!

Sincerely,

Cat

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225
225
Review of The Scary Mystery  Open in new Window.
Review by Cat Voleur Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
*Wolf2* DISCLAIMER *Wolf2*

I am not a professional editor or critic. All the opinions in the following review are just that; opinions.




*Wolf*A RAVEN FROM THE NORTH: AN INTRODUCTION:*Wolf*



Hello terry609 Author Icon ,

This review is written on behalf of House Stark for "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window..


*Wolf*THE NORTH REMEMBERS: WHAT I LIKED:*Wolf*



What I liked best about the piece is that it's clear you have a vivid image for what's happening, and an exciting plot for the story.


*Wolf* DARK WINGS, DARK WORDS:SUGGESTIONS: *Wolf*



I do have a couple of suggestions, the main one being that you edit the piece a little more closely. It's not formatted or punctuated, and there are a number of typos.

Here are just a couple quick tips/examples:

In the description you've written "sacry things" instead of "scary things"

You haven't used quotation marks around any of the dialogues.

There are no paragraph/section breaks.

You've written "fablous heros" instead of "fabulous heroes."

These are just a couple examples and things to look for, but I hope that they've helped some. I really think that a good once-over on the piece would help to polish it up, and with practice editing will become easier and not seem like such a chore.


*Wolf*WINTER IS COMING: A CONCLUSION:*Wolf*


I hope that the tips have been helpful. You seem to have such a clear image for your story, and I really hope that I've been able to help you clear that vision up for your potential readers as well.

Sincerely,

Cat


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