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13,132 Public Reviews Given
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Public Reviews
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501
501
Review of Winter Witches  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am happy to review you as part of our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"  12th Anniversary Free For All Raid!

Hi, April, and happy belated 10th ‘birthday’ on here!
For using only 200 words, you’ve written a good, albeit a bit sad, piece.
I like the idea of this young lad coming up with that grand plan to save the kingdom from the witches, only to be the first to die in battle, and that part about the witches coming out of their ‘spring-to-autumn slumber’ was a nice touch. That alone might even be a good inspiration for a longer story (or maybe a book, even!)
The spelling and grammar was flawless (thank you!), and the whole piece read smoothly.
Nice job, my friend!
Kee ponw ritin gon, April, and may you have many more wonderful ‘birthdays’ on WdC!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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502
502
for entry "Takedown " 
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi there, Carly!
This is a neat little legal FF piece, and you did a nice job of writing it. It has a beginning, a middle and an end, which isn't easy to do with these 300 word contests.
Writing it in the first person was a good choice. It looks like ol' Frank is going be 'in stir' for the rest of his life!
Great spelling and grammar, but I did spot one niggle:
"He did(.)" came the dry reply.' (should be a comma)
One thing you may or may not know about this contest is that Arakun the Twisted Raccoon is a big fan of surprise/twisted endings. I just mention this as food for thought in case you enter this contest again.
Kee ponw ritin gn, Carly! Thanks for sharing this, and have a wonderful evening!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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503
503
for entry "People" 
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hi, Joy!
I like your take (twist) on this prompt, and you did a great job of describing humanity in general.
People are a funny bunch, and it's very true that we can change at the drop of a hat. I don't mean to be sexist, but women go through cycles, and they've been known to be extremely emotional during a pregnancy.
But more than I anything, I think the moon probably plays the biggest part in it, and I love your outlook about it when it's 'missing-in-action'. That part about when it's missing and you 'can see the stars, knowing full well that the sweetness will be back in no time' is golden!
Thanks for sharing this, Joy!
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and have a wonderful day!
PS-And there's nothing really wrong with being a witch being hung up on the moon! *Bigsmile* *Witch*

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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504
504
Review by Angus
In affiliation with Cross Timbers Groups  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Aloha, Jody!
I never knew you to write flash fiction, but after reading this I hope you’re writing more!
This is great! I love twisted/surprise endings (as does Arakun the Twisted Raccoon, so I wouldn’t be surprised if this won the contest!), but most of the time they end with the last line. You took it even further by ending this with very last WORD!
Can’t say I’ve ever seen that before!
What’s more is that you even hinted at it all through the story! ‘Squawks’, ‘coffee beans’, ‘pecking away at the keyboard’. Normally I catch on to those, but you slipped them right past me! *Facepalm*
The spelling and grammar was flawless (as always!) and you did a great job with the prompt words, too!
Kee ponw ritin gon, thanks for sharing this, and have a fantastical day/evening/tomorrow!

A NOVEL WORKSHOP REVIEW

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505
505
Review of Puppet  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Hello again, Kiara.
Even though I’d like to say that this sounds like a real life experience of your own (a bad relationship, I would presume?), I won’t say that this sounds like a real life experience of your own because that would be wrong.
Right?
OK. Seriously, this is a pretty darn good analogy of somebody’s life being compared to that of a puppet, and you did great job of writing it. Using the first person POV makes it that much more personal, too.
It’s obvious that this puppet is letting somebody else control its strings (life), and yet the puppet can’t break free from its puppeteer. The Reader can feel the puppet’s pain, yet he can’t do anything except offer friendly advice, which the puppet probably already knows and will probably only take at face value.
Yet the Reader still feels obliged to offer it, so here it is: The Reader would say the puppet needs to take control of its own life, and the sooner, the better! Cut those threads and stop letting somebody else manipulate you, the Reader would advise the puppet.
Now the Reader knows this is probably easier said than done, but it needs to be done, lest the puppet never has a life of its own.
It’s here where the Reader says, “Nuff said.”
Some comments and suggestions (the spelling and grammar was flawless! Thank you!):
‘made them rough (and) coarse’
‘The darkness was blinding me, enveloping me, consuming me, comforting me, reminding me that I'm too broken to be fixed, convincing me to give up and stop trying already.’ (oddly enough, this is a very well written line, sad as it may be—especially that part about being too broken to be fixed)
‘The warm blood felt should have felt pleasant on my skin’
You’re a good person, Kiara. I can tell that, otherwise I wouldn’t be bloodying my fingertips writing this review to you!
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and again, welcome to WdC!
PS-I offered you some gift points for a review of my short story, "The Bridge" . A lot of people on this site think I’m a little warped, but they know me too well. I’d like to hear a stranger’s opinion, so let know what you think if you get a chance!
PSS-And don’t forget about the Please Review Page or The Shameless Plug Page under Community on the left hand side!
PSSS-You now have a new fan!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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506
506
Review of In my head!  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Hello there, Kiara. *Smirk*
Believe it or not, writing our thoughts, impromptu or not, can be one of the most cathartic things in the world. I've done it several times, and like you, I never expected anybody to read them. Well, I was wrong, and one of the first times I ever did it my father took me to a psychiatrist! I'm not kidding! I wrote a short piece when I was 14 about a fellow student who had killed himself because he wrecked his father's car. My father found the note and thought I was talking about myself (I had worded it a little strangely).
Oddly I just turned 54, but I WON'T tell you everything will be alright. But I will say this: you're still young, and you have your whole life to live.
You've only been on this site for a little more than two weeks, but I see you've already given 19 reviews. How many have you received? I hate to say it, but probably not too many, right? I don't have the answers to that other than to make yourself known! Post things on the Newsfeed. Get recognized!
Hell, email me and give me an earful!
OK. I'm gonna leave now since I hear your mommy yelling at you, but I'll leave you with a little information first.
Kee ponw ritin gon, Kiara, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here!
PS-And since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies"  and introduce yourself to the rest of the community if you haven’t already.

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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507
507
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*

Konnichiwa, Jimminy, and happy belated 11th 'birthday' on here!
This is really neat nostalgic/sentimental and endearing piece, and I love the way you told it. And I noticed you wrote it during the holidays, so I'm sure that just makes it even more special for you!
Christmas time is a time of loving, sharing, giving, and hopefully being around loved ones. I can just picture you standing in the back while Mom and Jimmy were having their Christmas discussion, realizing it wasn't going to such a good Christmas after all. And then to have your Dad take you off the 'naughty list' just for a hug?
If I weren't so thick-skinned, that would almost bring a tear to my eye!
This is kind of off topic, but when I was 16 I rolled my father's brand new 1981 Pontiac Trans Am (It was black with the eagle on the hood-looked just like the Bandit from the movie Smoky and the Bandit). Fortunately I didn't get hurt, but he didn't speak to me for a week, and most days when I got out of school I'd just walk down to the river and watch the birds. One day I was down there and I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was my dad. He put his arm around me and said, "I shouldn't have been so harsh with you. That damn car can be replaced, but I can't replace you."
That made me feel a LOT better!
Anyway, great job with this, Jimminy!
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and may you have many more wonderful 'birthdays' on WdC!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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508
508
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Greetings, Mickey Dougs!
For your 1st piece on here, this isn’t bad. It’s a little simple though, but I’m glad you something posted. Everybody has to start somewhere.
You’re missing some punctuation with periods and commas, but the spelling was excellent.
I see how this can be considered a fable. Just because Wolf hasn’t ever seen a porcupine before doesn’t mean it was lying, and Wolf had to learn this lesson the hard way!
Ouch!
Kee ponw ritin gon, Mickey, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you’re going to love it here!
PS-I don’t know how old you are (not that it matters), but you might want to get your bioblock (biography) set up so we can know a little something about you (hobbies, favorite books/authors, location, etc.), but that's up to you, of course.
PSS-And since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies"  and introduce yourself to the rest of the community if you haven’t already.

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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509
509
Review of Life with Physics  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with Cross Timbers Groups  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Howdy, SeanFear!
This is cool! I like how you opened up about your career choice and what you had to go through in college, although at first I wasn't sure what you meant about the teasing. How could anybody get physics and psychiatry mixed up? That is what happened, right? Since you referred to people asking you about your next sanitarium and what is your next session.
I never put anybody down about what they selected for careers in life, and in fact I always thought you had to be pretty damn smart to be a physicist. Hell, look at Stephen Hawking (God bless his soul!)! And then you have The Big Bang Theory, even though I'm not sure if that show was on when you wrote this 10 years ago.
Regardless, you have nothing to be ashamed of, as I'm sure you know by now.
As for Whose Line Is It Anyway, I LOVE that show! I used to watch it when that other English dude hosted it like 20 years ago, but they still had Ryan Stiles, Colin Mocherie, and a couple of other regulars!
That's right, the points DON'T matter!
Well done, my friend!
Kee ponw ritin gon, thanks for sharing this, always remember that energy equals the speed of light time mass squared! *Laugh* That's probably as much about physics as I know...

A NOVEL WORKSHOP REVIEW

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510
510
for entry "Game of Clouds" 
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Ahoy, Teresa!
I've always enjoyed looking at clouds and trying to see things in them, but this is the first time I've ever heard of somebody making a game out of it. And a travel game at that! Nice!
I love people who use their imaginations. Maybe that's because I was raised around a bunch of people who had no imaginations whatsoever! When I was a kid I'd sometimes point at something that looked like maybe dog in the sky and say, "Hey, check that out!" and they'd say "What? I don't see nothing, except a stupid cloud." *Angry*
Anyway, thanks for sharing this, Teresa, and thanks for the tip about 'the cloud game'! *Bigsmile*
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and have a wonderful day!
PS-I've even see trees that look like animals! Seriously!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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511
511
Review of Mouse Code  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Guten tag, Nordic Noir!
This is pretty good for a flash fiction piece.
One thing I enjoy about reading these FF contest entries is seeing how far people will think outside of the box with Arakun the Twisted Raccoon’s prompts, and you certainly thought outside of the box with this one.
Rat #6725 is apparently smarter than your average rat, but I think Sebastian was onto something with his suggestion that it might have an AC/DC song stuck in his head. After all, Angus rules! *Bigsmile*
Seriously though, you did a good job with this prompt. I guess even rats can get bored doing the same damn thing over and over again!
Sorry to be so picky, but I did spot one tiny niggle (grammar is a big pet peeve of mine—I even caught a quotation niggle in a R.L. Stine book the other day!):
(“)Like what kind of cheese he wants for dinner?”
By the way, when I first joined WdC, I actually managed to get one of my stories for this contest published. It’s "Invalid Item"  if you want to check it out.
Keeponwritingon, Nordic! ‘Twas a pleasure to read, and have a really gnarly day!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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512
512
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Ahoy, BusyButterfly!
I like how you’re doing this. You’ve obviously done a lot of research, and it shows. You’re delving deeper into Mary Shelley’s life with some of these details, revealing things I never knew about her. That recent movie we talked about in my last review told us a lot of things in general, but it didn’t really scratch the surface of her life as deeply as you are with these chapters. For instance, I didn’t know she felt guilty for the death of her mother, nor did I know about that she visited her grave and read and wrote there, or that she learned to read by touching the letters on her mother’s grave. I think that last part might be embellishing it a bit, but I don’t doubt that it could have contributed to her literacy.
You’re creating a biography of Mary Shelley here, and it’s certainly interesting. There’s quite a few grammar mistakes in it, but I won’t touch on those.
I’m a major Stephen King fan, and I know quite a bit about his life, so to read about Mary Shelley’s life is more fascinating than I thought it would be. I think that movie got me interested.
Anyway, I’ll keep reading these chapters as long as you keep putting them out here!
Until next time...
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and have a wonderful day!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

PS-I'm sure I told you this before, but iff you want more exposure for your items you can put them on the Please Review Page or The Shameless Plug Page under Community on the left hand side.

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513
513
Review of The Young Jester  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Ahoy, Jim!
This is a really nice piece! You did an excellent job of showing this young man's adversity to his illness by using 'laughter as the best medicine', and you've written it so well it could probably even bring tears to some folks!
The whole piece is written as the story of his life and how he brings smiles and hope to others, even after he's beaten his own terminal illness. Like they say, 'the show must go on', I guess.
I was a little surprised that this isn't the first I've read of this young man. I clicked on "The Jester"  and was surprised that I read and reviewed it 5 years ago!
Very well done, my friend! I'll try to take a look at the rest of these in The Jester Poems if I get a chance!
Kee ponw ritin gon, thanks for sharing this great and uplifting piece, and have a fantastic day!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

Take a long look! It's not too often you'll see me with a halo! *Laugh*

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514
514
for entry "Working the house" 
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Howdy, Wies!
I like this. I know you said it was a ‘clumsy attempt at writing’, but even though it’s just a little rough around the edges, I still think it’s good for a short FF piece. Mainly, the simplicity of it.
Whodathunk that just a little refurbishing on their house would be the cause of their deaths? But at least that zombie or whatever it was that buried down under their floorboards got himself a new house! Just a shame he had to finish doing Jack and Jill’s work! *Laugh*
Great spelling and telling, but I did spot one tiny niggle:
“A nice place, a lot of work though(,) and green paint for the living room.”
Kee ponw ritin gon, Wies, and have a marvelous day!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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515
515
Review by Angus
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Bon jour, Sorji!
I like the idea of this, but I got a little confused when the boy got older and his parents wanted him baptized. I was under the assumption that he was already dead and buried, so how could he be baptized? I guess it can be done posthumously, but doesn't the actual body have to be there?
I'm not familiar with the Fill in the Blanks, so maybe I missed something here...
Still, I can understand why the boy wouldn't WANT to be baptized since he was brought up by the Demon Spawn (which is obviously why he prayed-to the Devil?-when he stepped into the holy water).
Write on and rock on, Sorji! Other than that one small part I didn't get, I still thought this was cool!

A RAOK REVIEW!

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516
516
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*

Greetings, DyrHearte Writes, and happy 18th *Shock2* 'birthday' on here!
This feels a little dark, and I don't mean that to be a pun, even though it came out that way.
I like how you used day and night as brother and sister, and metaphorically, you hit the nail on the head! They are indeed brother and sister, but they're also just as different as night and day! *Bigsmile*
That line about the Father's glorious daughter Day shyly peeking in on brother Night really stood out, as did brother Night's darkness being interrupted by the rising moon!
Bravo, my friend! The mythological analogies were excellent!
Kee ponw ritin gon, DyrHearte, and may you have many more wonderful 'birthdays' on WdC!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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517
517
Review of City of Death  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Howdy, Ron!
I thought this was pretty good, although having lived in both the city AND the country, I won't say too much about your preference of one over the other.
OK. I know you're not saying that exactly, but more about what a lonely world it would be if we didn't have anybody to share it with. Right? Sounds good to me!
I currently live in a city of 100K people, and I really could do without all the sirens blaring in the middle of the night and hustle and bustle of city life. Ironically I was born and lived in the city for the 1st 11 years of my life, but then my father moved me to the country. I'd 10 times rather live in the serenity and peacefulness of the country!
Sorry, I digress.
You did an excellent job with rhyming words in this, and the meter seemed to be good also. That's about all I know about poetry, but with my limited knowledge of it, I still really enjoyed it!
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend! It was a pleasure to read, and may you have a wonderful day/evening/tomorrow!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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518
518
Review of The Pascal Egg  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Rojodi!
This is interesting. It almost feels like an old film noir story — it has the flavor of it with the private eye sitting there in the room with his client.
The fact that this casino owner was trying get revenge on somebody else by hiring the P.I. to find out who stole the egg was a god plot idea. And for using so few words, you told a complete story here! Well done!
I guess that 'tough' wasn't one to be trusted!
Very well done, my friend! Like I said, to write a whole 'episode' like this with so few words is something to be commended! *Salute*
Kee ponw ritin gon, Rojodi! Thanks for sharing this, and have a wonderful day/weekend!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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519
519
Review of Discriminations  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*

Greetings, Knight Life, and happy 18th *Shock2* 'birthday' on here!
Although I'm no poetry expert, I thought this was pretty good. AND pretty relevant, considering the political tweets of our so-called president these days.
I've never been racist, but unfortunately I've had to grow up around a lot of them. That 4th stanza about asking somebody if they're inferior of different because you make them so really stands out, and it makes a lot of sense!
Nobody should have to put up with racism, especially in this day and age! I thought we were finally getting over it, and now it seems to be in the spotlight all over again, thanks to a certain someone!
For as short as this is, you really said a lot with it!
Kee ponw ritin gon, Knight Life! Thanks for sharing this, and may you have many more wonderful 'birthdays' on WdC!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

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520
520
Review of Oil and Canvas  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Guten tag, Leadwood!
I thought this was really neat! I love the idea of you being what I assume to an escaped convict running from the hounds as they chase you through those woods, only to stumble and wake up in a museum with that painting of your captors looking around for you with their horses and confused faces!
Sounds like something right out of The Twilight Zone!
One niggle (I think):
'heals' should be 'heels' (unless this is UK spelling)
I know you wrote this for a contest, but why are you writing them days after the contest is over? In fact, I think I've seen a few of your FF stories that you've written for The Daily FF contest that you wrote after the prompt words were over.
You obviously have the talent, so what's up?
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and thanks for sharing this! It was a pleasure to read, and have a wonderful day/weekend!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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521
521
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Hello there, Busybutterfly!
I'm a writer/reader/lover and a judge of horror on here, so to see this history of one of horror's most famous writers was a treat for me.
I like how you're doing in this chapters, and although I know most of Shelley's history, I still plan on reading what you have in your portfolio so far.
There was show on TV recently (a movie?) called Mary Shelley, that really depicted her life before, during, and after she wrote Frankenstein. It was very well done, and as far as I know, it was all based on facts.
I'm impressed, Busybutterfly!
One thing you might want to check is the space between sentences in this. There should one space between them.
Kee ponw ritin gon, my friend, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here!
PS-You might want to get your bioblock (biography) set up so we can know a little something more about you (hobbies, favorite books/authors, location, etc.), but that's up to you, of course.
PSS-And since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies"  and introduce yourself to the rest of the community if you haven’t already.

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

PSSS-If you want more exposure for your items you can put them on the Please Review Page or The Shameless Plug Page under Community on the left hand side.

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522
522
Review of My Front Porch  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with Cross Timbers Groups  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*

Howdy, Str8shooter (Stephen?), and happy belated 15th ‘birthday’ on here!
This is a really neat nostalgic piece, and I love the way you wrote it! Our lives certainly go through ‘seasons’, and you did an excellent job of comparing your own life to that of Autumn as you reminisce about your wife and the times you spent with your children and grandchildren.
I also like how you broke this up into ‘chapters’ (for lack of a better word), but it was that last one that really made this shine. Sad as it may be, we’ll all have to come to expect that ‘man in black’ one day, and the fact you were/are sitting there waiting for him shows how calm and complacent when that time finally came.
Great spelling and grammar, but I did spot one tiny niggle:
‘An occasional visit from my sons(,) and my grandchildren brighten my spirits...’ (don’t need that comma)
Otherwise, great job! I honestly think this could be published somewhere; my first bet would be Reader’s Digest!
Kee ponw ritin gon, Str8shooter! It was pleasure to read this, and may you have many more wonderful ‘birthdays’ on WdC!

A NOVEL WORKSHOP REVIEW

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523
523
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*

Osiyo, Nordic Noir!
Having worked in the woods a good deal of my life, I took a special pleasure in reading this piece! Anything dealing with chopping trees down always intrigues me!
I like the fairy tale/fantasy style you wrote this in, and that part about the birds whose chirping sounded oddly like “Turn back” really stood out to me! Not to mention the magic of the tree making that deal with him!
I was a bit curious about the ending though. Since he declined the witch's offer, he received riches that lasted him for the rest of his life from those fairies. But if he would have chopped that tree down for that witch, he would only have got one hearty bowl of stew and some crusty bread!
I guess that's a question I might have pondered myself, though. *Laugh*
Kee ponw ritin gon, Nordic! Congratulations on the victory, and have a marvelous day!
PS-You have a new fan!

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#1300305 by Maryann- summer travel

Rawrrrr...


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524
524
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Bon jour, Bill!
I'm not really scared of snakes, and I've been lucky to have never come face to face with a rattler. But after reading this, I think you've given me a whole new perspective on these reptiles! *Shock2*
This is indeed quite frightening. You did a great job of showing Jake's fear, and you kept the action moving practically from the first word to the last!
And that ending was the icing on the cake, although I had a feeling this crazy reptile would 'wind' up choking him to death. But then again, who knows? Maybe it did while it was giving that last kiss 'goodbye'!
Love those descriptions with the similes and metaphors:
'like a bursted blood blister that burned with all the ferocity of battery acid'
'the sleek head with eyes as black and lifeless as push-pins'
Bravo, my friend! I was going to enter this contest, but after reading this, I'm having second thoughts!
Kee ponw ritin gon, Bill! Thanks for sharing this, good luck in the contest, and have a magnificent day!

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The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

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525
525
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Howdy, Percy!
Found this on Read & Review, and glad I did!
I really like this. This government (and all others) have been keeping us in the dark regarding UFOs and a lot of other things (the JFK assassination) for eons, and it's about time they started releasing some of this information!
I remember back in the 70's there a show on TV called Project Bluebook, which ironically was the name of the real project and was about government UFO investigations. I think it went off the air around the turn of the decade, and I haven't really heard anything about it since. But the show left a lot of questions open to the public.
It's great to see that the US Air Force and the Navy (I think) are opening up now and starting to investigate these most recent UFO encounters. I'm sick and tired of them trying to dispel the notion that they're not real, when they have no concrete evidence that it is.
Great job, my friend! I'm definitely going to check out that solar system with the 5 planets in the Goldilocks zone! I seem to recall having a dream or something where I was told that that's where my home planet is! *AlienG*
Kee ponw ritin gon, Percy! 'Twas a pleasure to read this, and have a fantastic day/evening!

GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama

My latest 'Angus' signature


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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