Wow, this has left me with out words! I think that you did an awesome job on the imagery in this! I could see all the others trying to stone this women for adultry and at the end the "god" of the religion as them if anyone there was sin free! You could picture this with the puublic slowly leaving because they could not stand there and say that they were sin free! Awesome Poem!!! I will be back to your port to read more!!! Keep On writing!!! I am glad to see you became a member of WDC!! Awesome newbie to read!!!
After reading the description, of this play script and reading this item I do not know what to say about the whole thing. I know that the Bagger made a great point "that you can hear everything" in the monitors is true. I am just not sure what else to talk about besides the ending of the piece.
The last part of this from the time the father could not get into the baby's nusery to the end of the script was confusing. I think that the script was a little confusing when the father was going back in forth to the baby's nursery trying to figure who was in there.
I think that having the mom rest the whole time in between this was not real perspective of a mother going through post partum depression. I figuring that you are trying to describe that through this. The reason why I am asking this, I have suffered from the post-partum psychosis. I hope that if this is what you are writing from that you please explore the tooic more and trying to add more to this from research!
Keep On Writing!!! I see potential in this and hope that I can read this when you have added more to it!
I just have to tell you after reading this, I need to get me some chocolate! I could taste every piece of chocolate you described! Honestly you made even like the chocolates that I would never eat!!! I think that the little silver box was described perfectly as I was reading this! You always have awesome imagery in your work!!! I want that box of candly!!! Keep On Writing!!!
Judity, I think that this was a great way to Thank everyone who has left good or bad feedback for reviewing your work. Ihave to admit when I Do review others work I do it on the content and the creativeness of the piece. I will admit that when I do my writing, that I still have mistakes even after using the spell check! I do have a book to use but I do not take the time get it out look at. I think that I will be doing that more with my writing! I want to thank you for writing about that this in your Thank you note. Newbies should not be discourage from negative feedback, cause all feedback helps everyone no matter what! Keep On Helping!
Judity you did a wonderful job on this monologue! I am glad to see more abnout your family. I have read this a few other times to look at other pieces you have wrote. I am glad that I took the time to get to know you! I enjoyed reading about you family! I also love the fact that you have cats and possums. I love reading about the Forensic team, and then reading your CSI books on here too! I will be back to read more of your shorts stories. Keep On Writing!!
I have to say that the imagery in this is awesome!!! I love the descriptions of the characters were perfect. When I read this piece the words flowed with the natural pause. Nothing that sounded ackward.
I did have one problem, i did not know who or what Fey is. I do not normally read fantasy of any kind! I will definitely have to look at the link that you have on there to learn of this character! I am glad that you have that there. I will be back at your port to visit again!!! Keep On Writing!!!
I have to say this is a really cute way to talk about the tooth fairy! I really love this! I could picture the imagery perfectly as I was reading it!! I could really picture the tooth angel as Tim climbed out of the crib. Your descriptions really made a great picture as you are reading the piece! I will be stopping by your port to read more!! Keep On Writing!!!
Kiya, You have came up with a great way to have others improve on their reviewing plus give feedback to newbies, oldies, and everyone else too! This is also great way to meet others who want to be angels to help others out! Since i am recording my reviews in here, I have noticed that I try to do atleast 6 a day. If i can get more, I am doing great. But I love reviewing to help others out!! As I love to get my feedback, so that I can improve on everything I need to do!! Keep On Coming up with ideas to help!! WDC must have thought you were helpful here too with your pretty blue case!!! I am glad to he part of the Angel Army!!!!
Sherri this is a wonderful poem for you mom at Christmas. I know how hard the holidays to be with out your love ones. I have been there, it is not cool. I love the imaagery in this poem. I cam see that you are thinking about your mother! I hope to read more in your port! Keep On Writing!
Kiya, You have came up with another way to have all the Angels come and have a great way to hang out and have fun!! You definitely deserve that wonderful awardicon for this. I have enjoyed being an angel and hanging out here too! I can wait to get to everyone of the Angels!!! Keep on Helping out WDC members!!!
This is a really cute story that is hilarious. I Really like the imagery that this paints as you are reading this with all the animals and the snow fight. I do see that you need to try to center the poem. As you are reading it, the lines do not go straight down. May have been from taking it from a word documnet and pasting it on to wdc format. I think that you have done a great job and hope that you keep on writing! Keep On Writing!!!
This is a great story. I love the descriptions through out the story. The imagery in this is awesome. I really love how Mary-lynn was able to to trust her Nanna with all her heart. Abby was able to feel at home at Marta house. I love how Mary-Lynn was told the proper story of Jesus and Santa Clause. I think that really brought Nanna and Mary-lynn closer as the story was told. I love how Mary-Lynn was so into the Christmas lights. I think that her climbing to the roof to see Santa added just the right touch of suspense. Then to come home to Nanna house with all the lights and Santa on their roof too made a great ending! So she now knows that Santa has came to their house too!!
I think that this story has potential. I think that this story has started off really slow. The imagery in here is good, but could be better with the more descriptions and maybe more detail at the beginning of the story. I think that some of the long paragraphs could be put into more than one paragraph. I think that this has potential to become a great story! Keep On Writing!
I do like the imagery in your poem. I have to say though as you read the poem, that this is hard to read due to the flow of the natural pauses as you read this.
I am not sure if you are doing a rhyming pattern or not. Some of the lines were rhyming and some were not so I could not tell if there was a rhyming pattern. I do like the last stanza how you can picture this stanza. I hope to read this again and review it for you. Keep On Writing!
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I would like to thank you for entering Round 5. I wish you luck this round and hope to see you in future rounds.
I do like the imagery in your poem. I have to say though as you read the poem, that this is hard to read due to the flow of the natural pauses as you read this.
I am not sure if you are doing a rhyming pattern or not. Some of the lines were rhyming and some were not so I could not tell if there was a rhyming pattern. I do like the last stanza how you can picture this stanza. I hope to read this again and review it for you. Keep On Writing!
Again I wish you luck you this round and hope to see you in future rounds to come.
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. I am glad that you have entered Round 5 of the contest. Hope to see you in future rounds. Due to real life issues the judging was delayed.
I think that this story has potential. I think that this story has started off really slow. The imagery in here is good, but could be better with the more descriptions and maybe more detail at the beginning of the story. I think that some of the long paragraphs could be put into more than one paragraph. I think that this has potential to become a great story! Keep On Writing!
I wish you luck this round and hope to see you in future rounds of this contest.
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. I am glad to see that you entered Round 5 of the contest. Due to real life issues, the judging has been delayed.
This is a great story. I love the descriptions through out the story. The imagery in this is awesome. I really love how Mary-lynn was able to to trust her Nanna with all her heart. Abby was able to feel at home at Marta house. I love how Mary-Lynn was told the proper story of Jesus and Santa Clause. I think that really brought Nanna and Mary-lynn closer as the story was told. I love how Mary-Lynn was so into the Christmas lights. I think that her climbing to the roof to see Santa added just the right touch of suspense. Then to come home to Nanna house with all the lights and Santa on their roof too made a great ending! So she now knows that Santa has came to their house too!!
I hope to see you in future rounds of the contest. I wish you luck in this round. Keep On Writing!!
Kiya as always you are doing great ideas to help others out no matter what!!! I am so glad to see this group out there to help with upgrades!! I would like to be member if possible...I hope that you are guys help out all the members you can with the upgrades!! I can't wait to see you helping more and more every day!!! Keep On Helping!!
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I want to thank you for entering this round of the conterst and hope that you enter future rounds. I want to let you know that i Do not read much fantasy. SO this is new experience for me, and I have to say that you did a good job. I would work on what point of view you are using. I think that you need to make some of the chracters tell the story more...I think that you have a great start for this story. I think that you should go into more in depth on the "daughter of the Ice godess" and who the ice goddess is...I was trying to remember if this was for the NaNoMo, if so you have done a great job for that...I want to apologize for having this late...Keep On Writing!! Please let me know when you have revised this again so that I can rereview it for you!!
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. I thank you for entering this round for the contest. I would like to see you in further rounds to come.
Personally I could not read the rest of the this story. I am disturb with it...I Do think you did a good job with the imagery, and the descriptions of the words to get the picture of what you are writing about. I also think that it does need a better title and descripttion of the story. I do appreciate you entering the contest. Keep On Writing...
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. I would like to thank you for entering in this round of the contest. I also hope that you enter in future rounds.
First of all I think that this poem as great imagery. I could picture what the descriptions were painting as I read through this poem. This poem has alot of emotions in this too. I really enjoy reading this. Keep On Writing! I hope to see you in the future rounds...
Hello there I am one of the judges for the Free Content Contest. Thank for you entering the contest and hope to see you in future rounds. I love this poem. This poem has lovely imagery in this. I love the description of the words that painted when you read the poem. You can feel the emotion as you are reading this to you your mom...Keep On Writing!! I hope to see you in future founds of this contest and the best of Luck!
Hello there, I am one of the judges for Free Content Contest. Thank you for your entry in this contest and hope that you continue to enter each round after this round!
I love the imagery in this poem. I think that the descriptions of the words painted a perfect picture that you are going for with this poem. I can picture the drunk mother who does not calm the baby down. I can picture the stooped man thinking about his wife that he lost too. As usual you have done a wonderful job on your poem.
I hope to see you in the future rounds of this contest...Keep Writing...
I think that this is an awesome idea! I know that you are always think of awesome ideas to raise gp's and for the members to get enjoy and work on WDC. I can't wait until I have some extra time to get some more gp's to donate to RAOK. I am so glad that you and SM have this site so everyone can enjoy the community within here!
Hello, I am one of the judges for the Free Content Contest. I think that you done a good job in the story over all. I do see some areas that you could improve with a little more detail. For instance, the accident would be an area that you could let the reader know how it occurred, when it happened, what was the emotion that the character felt after the accident. I also think going into more detail about the mother and father a little bit will give the reader an idea on the whole background of the character.
I did see some imagery in this story, but the description lacked in details on the above items. I think that you have a great start with this story and it does have potential. I hope that if you do write more to this story, that I am able to read and review it again. I wish you the best in this contest, and invite you to come back again for future rounds. Round two has been opened, so I wish u good luck! Keep On Writing!!!
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