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I'm good at evaluating the writer's creative statement or message. If there is no statement, the piece seems disconnected and it's difficult to see the purpose. Many readers would question whether there is a purpose at all. I'm good spotting language usage and grammar, punctuation and spelling problems. If corrections are needed, I'll point them out to you under suggestions.
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1101
1101
Review of Without you  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem describes the importance of love in your life. Lovely!

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
This is a very nice love poem. You have used imagery and simile to express your thoughts of love,Most memorable for me are: Without touch..."like thunder without rain..." Of course, what you have to say about your lover in your life is most memorable: You are like "a beautiful rose blossoming in the sun". I'm sure your love brings out the best in you.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
This free verse poem is unrhyming and has unmetered lines. You have made a study of imagery, similes, in your poem. One suggestion: Without arms around you, you feel like your skin is without bones. Is there another simile or metaphor you could use? Perhaps, "my flesh has no strength". You might want to give that some thought.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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1102
1102
Review of The Anchor  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem speaks of the anchor of your soul.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:
The.course of your ship, your soul, changes, but it is never lost because the anchor tethers your emotions, your will, and your mind. Most memorable to me is as follows:
"Jesus is the anchor of my soul
so when I'm tossed to and fro,
I always will know,
He'll never let me go."

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Your title is appropriate for your poem. Your free verse poem has a rhyming pattern, Aaab, except for Stanza 6. You might try reading your poem aloud, adding and subtracting syllables as needed for a smooth flow of words and a good rhythmical cadence. You might also want to try some different wording, eg"causes exhaustion" rather than "cause me to exhaust". In the last stanza try "II will always know" rather than"I always will know". More suggestions:
quite not Quite
cost, For though not cost, for though
cost that not cost, that
exhaust my not exhaust, my
goal not goal,
when not when'
Another option is no punctuation at all in your poem.


Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1103
1103
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
Rhis poem speaks of depression and sadness.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Sadness, feeling blue, helps us to remember better times. For others it is a misery that no one can take. "The blue is a misery so pure that it's almost nice, for no one can take it away from us, try as they might." "Tranquil sadness soaking through our very souls,".

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, mechanics or punctuation. Rhyming is sprinkled throughout your poem. You might want to try reading your poem aloud, adding and subtracting syllables as needed for a smooth flow of words.


Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1104
1104
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This is a very valuable glossary of poetic terminology.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
This glossary of terminology for poetry is most valuable for any poet. Use it to evaluate your poetry for assonance, alliteration, caesura, consonance, end stop, enjambment, near rhyme, in line rhyme, rhyme, refrains, stanza, structure, syllable, synonym, tercentenary, and tone. There is also a list of more advanced terminology.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation, or grammar.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1105
1105
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem speaks of the fears you had until you found a friend.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Your poem says you had fear before you found a friend dear to you. Your friend brings out your best and puts your objections to rest. Most memorable to me: Your friend "whispered to the fear in me".

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation or grammar. Rhyming. is sprinkled throughout this free verse poem. Your rhythm could be smoother. You might want to read your poem aloud and add and subtract syllables as needed. I enjoyed reading your sweet poem.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1106
1106
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This is a wonderful traditional poem, but the tradition goes further than rhyme and rhythm.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Your poem hooked me from the beginning as I recollected my own family tradition at birthdays and holidays. We call it re-cycling, as we trade gift bags, boxes and cards for birthdays and holidays. Your re-gifting includes bonding among family members, especially after death. I'm going to propose your lovely tradition to my family. Your tradition will ever more and more be appreciated as time goes on. I can see the joy in the faces of the sisters. I hope this wonderful way is continued. Most memorable to me is as follows: "Re-gifting it, pleasure she'd gain". "Mother to aunt, sister to sister". It's the small things that are remembered forever!

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in language usage, punctuation or grammar. There is a rhyming pattern and a smooth flow of words, creating a good cadence.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1107
1107
Review of Twins  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem speaks of the personalities of twin brothers.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You've shared that the twins shared everything, the same design, no birthday their own. They developed individual personalities as adults, but if a twin has pain they return to one again.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in language usage, punctuation or grammar. This free verse poem has a rhyming pattern and unmetered lines. Most memorable for me is the following: "And two are one again".


Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1108
1108
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This is a thoughtful free verse poem for your father.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
In your poem you thank you father for many things he has done for you. He has been there for you, taught you not to fear, showed you the way and what side to take. Most memorable for me is the following:

N"My father, the man who was there,
The man who made me
into the man I would share
With the rest of my family."

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
This free verse poem is unmetered with a rhyming pattern. I was not distracted by errors in language usage, punctuation or grammar.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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1109
1109
Review of Temperance  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This kyrielle sonnet speaks of being temperate in our outlook on life. Do not be depressed or negative about life.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You have referred to might have beens and how you have raised a toast to might have beens in your lifetime. This only witnesses the sinking of dreams. You say that you 'drink too deeply of my lies, tasting the failures'. A popular term among my associates is 'wanna be's. I don't think the terms are that much different. My term just isn't final yet!

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation or grammar. Imagery is very good. Well written poem.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1110
1110
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
The loss of your father has a severe impact on family members. Remembering him and sharing grief with family members is a beginning of healing.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
The layout of your poem was the very first thing that caught my eye. The format of your poem brings about a very gentle comprehension of beautiful memories. You speak of him as resting in the presence of God. You refer to your father as "no lesser the man". Most memorable to me: "...All of us who remain here will be even closer to you and each other. Father Friend the end". You are sure you will see him again. These are lovely thoughts.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation, or grammar. You have done a good job writing your unmetered free verse with rhyme sprinkled in the poem,

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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1111
1111
Review of In Heaven  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
What will man comprehend beyond the world of matter and its spiritual counterpart?

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You wonder what you will understand in heaven when "the clothes of this earthbound existence are folded and laid aside." Since we mortals are not able to perceive heavenly realities, it is faith alone that tells you there is a nightingale singing of paradise. There is the fragrance of the rose of unity. You will see the unveiled face of the Beloved. Truly a beautifully spiritual thought. Thank you. You gave me a wonderful lift today, reminding me that what we need is faith.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation or grammar. Rhyme sprinkled in.your free verse with unmetered lines. Very nice imagery.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1112
1112
Review of Patchwork Quilt  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
Autumn is a time of the wind unmasking bare branches .

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Colored leaves fall in autumn as a patchwork quilt with dreams of the rebirth of spring. Nice job.
*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled through your free verse poem. Rhythm creates a nice flow of words and a good cadence. Your imagery is lovely. Eg 'a colored farewell'. Most memorable for me: "a whispered colored farewell is their final prayer".

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1113
1113
Review of The Journey  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
Your free verse poem is a good statement of Christians' courage and hope,

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Your poem speaks of Christians not fearing the journey God has given to them even though there is a twister near. They don't fear voices that belong to themselves. Tears of happiness from heaven come to them and the cry heard is a sign of Him. God has granted glorious love. Beauty is simplicity.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled through your poem. Your inline rhyming is quite interesting. Rhythm creates a nice flow of words. Your imagery is effective, eg 'intoxicated by shimmering spirits.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1114
1114
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This traditional poem is about the effect of Adam and Eve's sin on mankind and the meaning of the howl of canines.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
An angel cried and there was a 'plaintiff's wail'. when that angel cried. God allowed a 'fitting serenade' because he wanted man to hear thei howl of the canines so that man would not miss the sorrow felt by him for the future he had made.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in punctuation, usage or grammar. Your imagery is effective. There is a good rhyme pattern and rhythm which creates a nice flow of words. Most memorable for me: "Man got the meaning of the canine call all too soon. Today it's purpose is unrecognized hidden meaning lies." Society is much worse with hidden lies today.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1115
1115
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your pieces, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This monologue tells the story of a polyglot who is visiting in Hong Kong, the other end of the world from Ireland where he has lived in the past.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Hong Kong, now loaded with skyscrapers, is full of polluted air. The climate is near tropical, hot and sweaty, and a very different weather from what you are used to. There are hierarchical social expectations. Manners and politeness and respect are demanded in Hong Kong. You say your jokes don't go over. You do not feel connected with the people there. You are at the other end of the world. I can imagine you would feel a rift, getting used to a new mentality.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by.errors in usage, punctuation or grammar. Nice job of writing.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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1116
1116
Review of The venom of life  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem is about a weakness of the human being especially when fire is given fuel.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
A weak human being looks for a serving tray to fuel its problem. The venom of life attacks the veins, brain, arteries, heart, flesh, nerves, bones and soul. The heart flutters. Nerves have illusions. The body "...seeking salver to the living fire, it feels thirsty for liquid death liquor." "Taking six senses from the five" is repeated many times because that's what happens. There is no such thing as a sixth sense, but you think you have it under control. It dulls the five senses. Yes, this venom is a losing proposition. Ask any dry alcoholic.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Rhyme is sprinkled throughout. Rhythm creates a nice flow and a smooth cadence. Your imagery is excellent, eg "rots the fibers into trash". Excellent job.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1117
1117
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
Rising above a life of pain gives the opportunity for a fresh new start.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You say your heart is bold as it soars above grief. There is a rapture of joyous relief. A fresh start begins with "the taste of another fine start".

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Your traditional has a very nice rhyme pattern of Abbas. The rhythm provides a smooth flow of words and a good cadence. Imagery is very effective, eg "rapture of joyous relief".
Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac



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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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1118
Review of Asseveration  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
In your traditional poem you look into the records of universal law

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
One can visit a mystical library every day. There are objective memories and knowledge as you were transported to this sanctum in the air. You were part of stars and galaxies, and saw records of every victory and strife in your life. You saw the pettiness, hurt, kindness, gentleness, all these emotions. Each of us is responsible for the life we choose to lead. "...this life is the song I sing. We are each part of the melody of pain and joy that it brings." About yourself you say you cannot right the wrongs you've done, but you'll do the best you can.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:{/b
I was not distracted by any errors in usage, punctuation or grammar. You have done a wonderful job writing your traditionalpoem. Rhyming pattern is aabb. Rhythm brings about a good flow of words and a nice cadence. Your imagery is very excellent, "sanctum in the air", "perfect harmony", "me with a silver cord".

Suggestions: It seems that you would be repentant of the pain and hurt you've caused.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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1119
1119
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi! MD Maurice, I'm GerMac. I am here on behalf of Power Reviewers Group. I will review your short story. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Bulletg*- MY OVERALL IMPRESSION: -
This is a descriptive piece about your French grandmother, who migrated from Quebec to New England,

*Bulletg*- SETTING/THEME:-
The setting takes place in Quebec until the grandmother was in her early 20's. She moved to New England where she made good use of a pool her spouse had built in the family home. Later she moved to a local home for the elderly.

*Bulletg*- PLOT/HOOK: -
This is a very nice description of the grandmother, but there really is no plot. I do not see any conflict or resolution. There are many fond memories, among them the children relishing visits to see grandmother because they knew she would give them their choice of "wishes', which were chocolates. She was an avid churchgoer who loved making brownies for the Pope. She had an affinity for him.

*Bulletg*- CHARACTERS/DIALOGUE:-
Grandmother
Children

There is no dialogue per se.

*Bulletg*- LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/GRAMMAR:-
I was not distracted by errors in language usage, punctuation or grammar. Your short story is very well written, very descriptive and expressive. Nice job.

*Bulletg*- MOST. MEMORABLE:-
Most memorable to me is the following:
"Time spent in her presence could make you feel inoculated from the ugliness..." She was talking about the world events she was aware of but never spoke of.

*Bulletg*- SUGGESTIONS:-
You might want to show some action in one part of your story that two characters disagree with and show the characters' differing points of view. Adding dialogue with that action could give some flow and pace to your story.

Thanks for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review of Trying to be  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi! Spicy! I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
The poet says he is missing that feeling. That feeling must be the feeling of being alive.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
I am not sure if you are describing a woman who made you feel so alive, "...Never in your life had you felt so alive...' or if the description fits a storm. Which is Itzel? You could make that more clear.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
This free verse poem has no rhyme. Rhythm flows nicely. You have used imagery very effectively. An example, my favorite part, follows:
"...the wild in her eyes,
That spark of crazy mixed with chaos,
The way she glowed with severity."

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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Review of Not sure yet...  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem describes the aurora lights reflecting on the water.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You have written a lovely descriptive poem about the aurora lights and their reflection on the water. Were you there to see this? Very nice job.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
In this free verse poem I was not distracted by errors in language usage, punctuation or spelling. Effective use of personification, making the aurora lights come to life. My favorite part: "...glimmer wishes using one would see..." There are a few grammar errors that need cleaning up, as follows:
light's longings not lights longings
bring not brings
Did you mean emanating and not eliminating?
Did you mean pattern not patter?
To aurora you could add lights


Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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Review of A Simple Man  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile* If they make sense, use them. If they don't make sense, don't use them.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
John had good inner sight. He tried to share this trait with others, but no one would listen.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
John would be rich if he'd shave and shower so others would listen to his powerful message. He preferred the homeless because each could touch someone gently and make them sway. All they saw was a smelly, dirty homeless man. He'd seen the light and knew which path he should follow. He had a wife who planned to leave him. He left her that day and he never returned. He then felt. filthy, as if he'd been. walked on. He went nameless, as he didn't want her to track him. She was a politician so his absence would go unnoticed.

One day he saw her, but he walked the other way. Seeing her motivated him to get a job, and an apartment. He realized he couldn't see into tomorrow. He felt relieved of helping the homeless. His inner sight returned. He predicted his own death the next day. His tombstone epitaph read that he was a deaf, blind mute.

MOST MEMORABLE:
"Here lies a simple man, John LeGraf,
He never said much that anyone recalls,
He was deaf and blind, a mute after all."

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Nice rhyming and rhythm. Good raconteur. Poem is logical. I was not distracted by errors in language usage, grammar or punctuation.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems for our May Review Raid, Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*. If they don't make sense to you, don't use them.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This free verse poem is about summer, written as a Sarabande sonnet.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
Tunes are heard from the ocean surf and the gurgling stream. Seagulls and butterflies dance above a daffodil bouquet. The poet helps the summer spirits celebrate on the beach, the mountains and the meadow. The cicada. Serenade stops after the shower cools the glade.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
This free verse poem has a rhyming pattern and metered lines. It is a Sarabande sonnet for Asian dance. There is beautiful imagery and personification in the poem.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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Review of Crayola  Open in new Window.
Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems, for our May Review Raid. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*. If they don't make sense to you, don't use them.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This is a free verse poem about spring and the colors Mother Nature enjoys splashing all over living things.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
You speak of the grass being soaked in emerald green and the landscape is painted at sunrise. Water lilies and honeysuckle are painted at sunrise. The peacocks have a quest to propagate and Monarch butterflies fly around in meadows befitting royalty. Springtime brings vitality to everything. There is a sunset at the end of the day.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
Generally, there is a rhyme pattern in your poem. There is a smooth flow of words, creating a good cadence. Your imagery is very nice. You use personification effectively.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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Review by GerMac Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
I am GerMac, affiliated with Power Reviewers Group. I am here today to review one of your poems for our May Review Raid. Please use my suggestions as you see fit. *Smile*. If they don't make sense to you, please don't use them.

*Butterflyb*-- OVERALL IMPRESSION:-
This poem speaks of the living things in nature.

*Idea*--THEME/CREATIVITY:-
I love your use of personification. "Flowers open their petals with a yawn." The sound of the couple rowing the boat is the Earth's melody. Creativity is so beautiful. Geese spread their wings, willow branches sway in the wind, water ripples quietly in the pond, "nature wakes up with a bristling sound'. Resting...a couple rows a boat, a woman reads a book, and geese sleep under the willow.

*Pencil*-- TECHNIQUE/LANGUAGE USAGE/PUNCTUATION/SUGGESTIONS:
I was not distracted by errors in usage, punctuation, grammar or spelling in your poem. This is a free verse unmetered poem. You have some beautiful imagery in your poem and some lively personification.

Thank you for sharing.

Regards,
GerMac


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