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6,044 Public Reviews Given
6,044 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I'm the lead editor for a small independent press, but I am on maternity leave for the next several years and thus not accepting submissions. I'll tell you my professional opinion on first chapters or short pieces and whether I would have accepted it or rejected it if I was looking for work. I've dealt most with controversial speculative fiction, and I'm most interested in polyamory a.k.a consensual non-monogamy.
Favorite Genres
Science Fiction, Historical Fiction, Fantasy, Romance, Dystopia, Erotica
Least Favorite Genres
stream of consciousness
Favorite Item Types
Short Stories, Novels, Fraternal Polyandry
Public Reviews
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Review of Dusty Cousins  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is absolutely beautiful. It brings back thoughts of all the people I love.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Thanks for sharing these deeply personal thoughts. Writing about these things is a great way to process your feelings and let others who have had similar experiences know they are not alone.

Every child deserves to have parents who love them unconditionally. However, being a parent is also difficult work. I think it is important for parents to talk about their feelings in a constructive way, and your mom spoke in a destructive manner. I'm sorry you have to go through this, and you shouldn't have to, but since you are in this situation, and you have access to the internet I recommend doing some searches on how to cope with an emotionally abusive parent.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
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1353
Review of The Fall  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a beautiful poem. It reminds me of my first love, when I had a physical sensation of falling even though I was safely nestled in a soft chair.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Is this meant to be a test piece or a placeholder? I recommend drafting your story in a separate program such as MS Word, Open Office, or Google Docs and then copying and pasting it when you are ready to share it.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is handy information. It could be even more compelling if you told a story about someone who used these this service.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

It is indeed sad when people cannot communicate well. However, there are times when one is too busy to even say that they are busy. At the end of a long day, one can be too exhausted to bother. However, when this goes on for more than a month, it is safe to say that the person is not interested in replying and cannot think of a polite way to say so.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of It's a Love Story  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a lovely piece. Modern technology has the advantage of letting people fall in love with another's personality before getting to know a person's body. However, in this particular scenario, I worry about Amelia potentially falling into an abusive relationship. If she goes against her parents' wishes to meet Leo, she may not feel safe returning to her parents if things go sour.

Personally, my parents never stopped me from dating in high school, so I had a little experience under my belt before I left for university. When I was 19, I met a much older man, and I moved in with him when I was 21. After I moved in with him, he started getting verbally abusive. I stayed with him a few more years because I didn't recognize verbal abuse as abuse. Towards the end, I went to spend a week and a half with my friends in town. I gave my boyfriend another chance, but he kept me awake all night yelling. Sleep deprivation is a torture method, so you could say that crosses the line into physical abuse. When my parents called to check in on me the next day, I was so tired I couldn't talk straight, just cried. My dad drove two hours to come pick me up. Moving back in with my parents was good for me because they treated me like an adult and still showed me love as a member of the family. I got married at 29, and now I'm 32 with a one-year-old son.

I'm glad I had a lot of experiences when I was younger so I know when someone is treating me right. I get into arguments with my husband sometimes, but we both recognize that we're not perfect, so we both apologize and talk about our feelings and how we can both do better next time. We are also only a year apart, so he never plays the age card on me.

If moving back in with parents after a bad relationship is not an option, it's important to have an emergency fund that is not accessible by the other partner. Keep a bank account that is only in your name with enough money to pay for a deposit and first month's rent on an apartment as well as other living expenses. Keep this money a secret.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Thanks for sharing your experience. My husband spent six years in the Navy, and a lot of this sounds familiar.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Is this meant to be a test piece or a placeholder? I recommend drafting your story in a separate program such as MS Word, Open Office, or Google Docs and then copying and pasting it when you are ready to share it.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of The Old Days  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a great start. It feels a little disjointed, but you can smooth it out later.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is indeed a tragedy. I hope everyone comes through safely.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a lovely piece. That workshop sounds a lot more valuable than the est training my ex-boyfriend kept raving about.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of A Decision  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

I have a toddler, and let me tell you that raising children is not for everyone! I think the narrator made the right choice leaving like that. It will give her space to find someone else if she really wants kids.

Non-monogamy is a good option for people who love each other but have mismatched desires when it comes to reproduction. However, they need to communicate very clearly and set clear boundaries about how involved/avoidant the partner who doesn't want kids will be. It takes a village to raise a child, and prospective parents should evaluate the strength of their village before embarking on parenthood. Grandparents, other relatives, friends, neighbors, and daycare providers all count as part of that village..

I don't like the use of "want a family" or "start a family" as a euphemism for reproducing. A family can be two or more adults. A family can be one person and one or more pets. Children are not a necessary part of a family.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of Perceptions  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This provides a lot of food for thought. It reminds me of something I saw on a meme once. It went something like this: I'm not a gamer because I don't have a life but because I choose to have many.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of Testing!  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a good start. I wish you the best of luck on your writing journey.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.5)
Thanks for requesting my review!

I recommend cutting down on the use of "could" where possible. "Could" is necessary in some places, but in other places, it only makes the prose more wordy.

In this instance, I see the first "could" as unnecessary, but the second "could" is necessary:

He could see where the boy was coming from, but did not know if he could ever accurately explain it.

I recommend:

He saw where the boy was coming from but did not know if he could ever accurately explain it.

Alternatively:

He understood where the boy was coming from but did not know if he could ever accurately explain it.

Also, since the second clause is dependent on the first, leave out the comma:
https://justpublishingadvice.com/when-do-you-use-a...
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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

I noticed you ended this piece with a comma. Is this meant to be a test piece or a placeholder? I recommend drafting your story in a separate program such as MS Word, Open Office, or Google Docs and then copying and pasting it when you are ready to share it.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of The Moonlight  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

You've painted a vivid picture with your words. This was quite gripping.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of My introduction  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.5)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Being a retired journalist is awesome, though perhaps you could elaborate a bit more on your experiences. Were you mainly international or local? What were your favorite topics to cover?

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of J's diary  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

For me, this was an entertaining insight into another culture. While some of the phrasing was awkward, the meaning always came through clearly.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is an interesting view on life. Personally, I'm a fan of the starfish story. It's a short story, I'm not sure where it originated, but there are several versions online that all say essentially the same thing.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This is a great start. You've set up some interesting characters and left some mysteries to intrigue the reader.

“It’s” is a contraction for “it is.” If you want to make it possessive, drop the apostrophe. This is the single most common grammar mistake I see among beginning authors, so you’re not alone in this.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This was nice overall, except "that really isn’t a reason to cry" stuck out like a sore thumb to me. It's a perfectly valid reason to cry. Whether someone chooses to cry as part of their grieving process or not is a deeply personal decision that they should not be shamed over.

Since you mentioned this was written for an ex, it brings to mind how one of my friends called me over an imminent breakup. His girlfriend's cousin recently died, and my friend was deeply regretting not being more sensitive to his girlfriend's feelings over the loss.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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1374
Review of A Bad Batch  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

This was a very interesting concept. I had a clear view of the scene playing out in my head.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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Review of Deserve it all  
Review by K5Rakitan
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Welcome! I stumbled upon your work through the “read a newbie” feature.

Thanks for sharing these deeply personal thoughts. Writing about these things is a great way to process your feelings and let others who have had similar experiences know they are not alone.

Happy writing, and I hope you enjoy it here!
I am also running a contest in case you are interested:
 
FORUM
Lewd Poems Contest  (18+)
Monthly contest for people who find joy in lewd things.
#2250133 by K5Rakitan

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