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1201
1201
Review of Winter day  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings mars
~*Star*~ A brief Summary
A winter's day is described using iambic meter.

~*Star*~ What this made me think of:
This poetic piece transported me in time from now to then, from spring to winter. I feel the gray of the sky mixed with the blues as the clouds float across the sky.

~*Star*~Any editing comments:
I noticed nothing to comment on as far as editing.

~*Star*~What I liked best:
I especially liked the way the at the end of the piece a description of the format is given. This allows for understanding of the format for those who are new to poetry.

~*Star*~Suggestions:
Perhaps some more exploration with this format should be per-sued due to the excellent way this was done. Then a book could be put together. I could feel the coolness of winter with the hint of spring through this reading.

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#1143571 by ~WhoMe???~



~*Star*~Thank you for sharing your creative and artistic writing skills! ** Image ID #1171596 Unavailable **
1202
1202
Review of The WDC Review  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings fyn
~*Star*~ A brief Summary:
This free-style poetry transformed the universe of my existence, taking me on a journey through another realm.

~*Star*~ What this made me think of:
An abyss of darkness from which falls words and phrases, coherent to the reader, yet strange and new. The verse and metaphor trap the reader into a new world, one of such power that the reader is lost in the moment, nothing else exists outside the abyss.

~*Star*~Any editing comments:
I saw nothing I could or should comment on in the areas of grammatical, punctuation or spelling. I found this to be well written and full of vision.

~*Star*~What I liked best:
This is one of the most amazing pieces I have seen on reviewing. It is a very visual piece that shows the heart of the reviewer and how easy it is to get sucked into a great article, poem, story, or any other worthy piece of writing, when doing a review. This was done very creatively and with great style.

~*Star*~Suggestions:
Submit this one for publishing. This is a very creative poem.

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~*Star*~Thank you for sharing your creative and artistic writing skills!white and blue name sig
1203
1203
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings J. A. Buxton
~*Star*~ A brief Summary:
It is always a pleasure to review a piece of your work. Your heart and soul pour forth for the reader. With each end of the sentence we stop for a breath as we try not to choke. We feel each emotion you evoke with your words.

~*Star*~ What this made me think of:
A great piece to write on. A hope for the future. Respect for the office. Many great ideas and ideals are shared in this small piece.

~*Star*~Any editing comments:
NONE>

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~*Star*~Thank you for sharing your creative and artistic writing skills!hot coffee
1204
1204
Review of Weather Cat  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings typingrhyme
~*Star*~ A brief Summary:
Weather predictions with a twist. This is a humorous look at a cat with talent. The alternate rhyming scheme grabs our attention and keeps the reader interested. Cleverly done,

~*Star*~Any editing comments:
With the exception of the second stanza the rhyming scheme flows smoothly. The second stanza is a forced stretch and could use a little work.

~*Star*~What I liked best:
I liked the fun upbeat pace the poem takes. It paints a picture of funny antics that play an important part of a day. Deciding whether or not to take the umbrella now depends on the mood of Mariah. A very fun read.

~*Star*~Suggestions:
I would consider adding the word do to the last line before the last word.

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~*Star*~Thank you for sharing your creative and artistic writing skills!hot coffee
1205
1205
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.5)
♥♥♥♥♥ Reviewed by a Simply Positive member ♥♥♥♥♥



Revelry new writings soon

*Star*Brief Summary:
A contest to inspire poetic verse and thought. Generous prizes availbable to be won. A realistic time line created to allow for creativity from the entrants.


*Star*Suggestions:
Will there be a listing for a round 18 to open? I can't wait to see what new prompts are available.

Is round 17 still open, or did it end in June?

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1206
1206
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Joy

*Star*Brief Summary:
An emotionally inspiring piece that brings out the patriotic appeal of peace and harmony.

I find this free-stlye poem to invoke a spirit of calm in myself. As I flow from line to line the words paint a picture of stability and peace for me.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
The flowing of the colors as they float on the breeze spreading emotion and fulfillment through the presence of the steady stability and fight for all was very moving.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:

In the beginning I was thrown off balance by the first word. It took me a few times of reading to find the value behind Hope

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1207
1207
Review of Galway Bay -  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am planning a trip to Ireland. I have always had some weird fascination with it. I have never been there. Have never studied or looked into it before. Now I have found the strength and purpose to drive me to search out what may lay ahead for me in Ireland. I have seen a few pictures of Galway Bay now, and none compare to your picture here. Thank you for sharing.

If you have any travel ideas or suggestions, please let me know

Jenny
1208
1208
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
♥♥♥♥♥ Reviewed by a Simply Positive member ♥♥♥♥♥



J. A. Buxton

*Star*Brief Summary:
A contest prompt turned into a joy of sunshine. Actions speak louder than words and often have a ripple effect in life, that many will never know. What you say or do now can change lives, for better or for worse. This is a good modern day fable. A tale that has a lesson to teach to all.


*Star*Suggestions:
Though this writer is great at writing novels, I find her short stories intrigue me just as well, if not more. The prompts Judy takes and uses turn into fascinating stories for the reader. I would like to someday see these fashioned into a collection.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I started reading a story, only to find myself seeing a lesson in life that all should keep in their mind.

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1209
1209
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.5)
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C.E. Thieroff

*Star*Brief Summary:
An insight to another way of living. Having it all, yet having nothing at the same time. This poetic piece, though not my normal rhythmatically rhyming style, was a pleasure to read. I found myself wrapped up in the emotion as well as the picture this created.


*Star*Suggestions:
Originally I had a suggestion to alter this format. Use the less is more concept. The more I read it, the more I realized, it was perfect how it is. I couldn't imagine it being said any more clearly. That being said, the only other suggestion would be to add this to the pile for publishing.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked the last verses. How looking back, it didn't start out with these intentions, this is how it ended though. A reflection on how it came to be.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
The last two lines, kept me stumbling. I had to read them several times. Perhpas if you add a comma after the words, waysand sadly it would flow a little smoother.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
I kept stumbling. I did read this multiple times, but the last part kept tripping me. Maybe it is just me though.

Luck Of The Irish Auction   (E)
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#1143571 by ~WhoMe???~


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1210
1210
Review of once more...  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Tina

*Star*Brief Summary:
A beautiful poem. I could sense the love within, as well as the loss.


*Star*Suggestions: Though this is well written, the voice of the poem to me seemed a bit rushed, when reading it as it was originally formatted. I took your lines and re-formatted them. To me, this reads with more emotion. With a pause at the end of each line, there is a sense of longing that follows. Try it and let me know what you think. Keep in mind, this is your work, I am only commenting on what I see, and you the author are the artist of this portrait. I may see a smiling woman, you may have a Mona Lisa! Do not change what you feel should remain.

If I could see
your face,
I could smile
once more.
If I could touch
your arm
I could lift
the heavy burdens
Off my shoulders
If I could see
your beautiful smile,
I could speak
without guilt.
If I could hear
your sweet voice
Telling me you loved me,
I could love
and feel once more.



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1211
1211
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Thought Particle

*Star*Brief Summary:
Since you are writing a novel which takes place on Mars, it is great that you can miss it so. It makes for better writing when you can take a break from the story. Not only do you give this information to us, but you share that your time here is valuable to you and you have no regrets about it. Also the fact that this may have been written from work comes across almost like a laugh or flaunt. As if to say, "I may not be able to spend my time writing of my Mars travels, but I can drop in and say hi".

*Star*Suggestions:
With this being a free-style poem, I am not sure the ideas I have would benefit this poetry. To me, it seems broken and filled with laughter as if sharing a secret joke, all the while complaining that you were dragged away by the prior commitment of work.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I especially liked the next to last verse where instead of deleting a word, the line-out is used. To me this helps with the humor part of the piece.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
It took me a moment or two to break myself away from the habit of trying to put this into a rhythmical piece. I wanted to rhyme myself through this poem, however, that is not the intention of this piece. The freedom of the lines are shown within the free-style format, as well as with the choice of showing time passage.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
I found this a fun piece to read. I read it a few times to get the feel for it, then read it again to understand and enjoy it. A very clever write.

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1212
1212
Review of My Love For You  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
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letmebe

*Star*Brief Summary:


*Star*Suggestions:
~for the first line, if I could just make one suggestion: the last word needs adjusted. Instead of awake it should be wake{/}.

~The alternate rhyming scheme works real smooth until the last verse. Though the rhymes are flawless, the first rhyme in the last verse is in rhythm with the previous verse. To me this through off the poem. I would consider a different rhyme for the last verse.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
What I liked about this is that I could envision this two ways.
~I envision this as a love story with the love growing and blossoming.

~I also envision this as a heartbreaking piece.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Mentioned above in the suggestions.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
A well written piece.

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#1408837 by ~WhoMe???~


1213
1213
Review of Dream Catcher.  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Gothic Angel gone

*Star*Brief Summary:
From the beginning, I saw this as a poetic piece. Thoughts trapped on the screen spiral downward into depression only to find the catcher of all that we hold sacred. The dream.


*Star*Suggestions:
This is full of inspiration for writing a poem. I could visualize it as I read each line. Begin with the dark and despair, ending with the light shining on the dream catcher which brings it all into perspective.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I saw this as exercising of a demon. I saw this as a metaphor for life. I saw this as a work of art and a way to work through life.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Absolutely nothing.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
A well deserving piece.

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1214
1214
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
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Legerdemain

*Star*Brief Summary:
Dream or reality, sometimes it is just too hard to distinguish until the waking moment. By then it is too late, the fear has taken over. This is an intense piece. As I read it each time, for it was so good I did so more than once, my muscles tightened as the tempo accelerated. I had to get up and walk away, roll the neck, flex the shoulders. A very powerful piece.


*Star*Suggestions:
I could find nothing to add or take away from this piece. I sit here now tense with tight muscles, getting a headache from the anxiety I felt as I put myself into the character. A writing so good that the reader morphs into the character. My only suggestion would be put this piece into print.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
The acceleration built along with the anxiety to an intensity without repeating ideas or actions.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
I had to go get two Tylenol to help release the tension that built up in my own muscles as I became the character.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
Any piece of writing that can transmit the emotion and words into physical attributes deserves a five star rating. Bravo my friend. Thank you, a great read.

*The headache will pass, but now I fear that when driving at night, I will forever be reliving this dream with you. I hope and pray the outcome is never the same. I travel 7.9 miles from work to home, in a rural area, where at any given night if it is bright enough due to the moon, or early enough in the evening, you can count 30-50 deer along the route.*

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1215
1215
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
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COUNTRYMOM-JUST REMEMBER ME

*Star*Brief Summary:
A superb poem of comfort and rhyme that carries a great message of the place she truly wishes to be. Sharing warmth and love for this special place, the voice speaks of why this place is dear.


*Star*Suggestions:
How do you improve or give suggestions for a piece so well written, other than to suggest it is put into print.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked how each rhyming verse ended in a statement. The non-rhyming exclamation each verse ended with brought the reader back to the beginning, and set forth the message with all clarity.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Absolutely nothing troubled me here.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
A well deserving piece.

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1216
1216
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Funnyface is happy to be back

*Star*Brief Summary:
Lessons passed on through the generations, from parent to child are ones memories and legends are made of. An alternate rhyming poem of a spiritual lesson is taught within the confines of this poetry.


*Star*Suggestions:
There two different spellings for the name Jenny. You use them both here. It is a tad confusing. I however am partial to the spelling ending in "y" for that is my name. Jenny. I would use one or the other, but not both.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
This had a great rhyming scheme and stayed true to that all the way through. There were no forced rhymes and this told a clear and easy story with a lesson for others to follow.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
The name issue listed above, but only for personal reasons. Perhaps I should write about it one day.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
You tell me. Read this everyone, a great poetic writing, ready to be shared with all of the public.

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1217
1217
Review of empty parking lot  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
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tc_davis

"This is a review in connection with "Invalid Item."

*Star*Brief Summary:
I have pondered this poem for many a day now. The only thing I can come up with, is it is as it states, thoughts that wonder randomly and aimlessly through the mind while sitting in an abandoned parking lot.

I may have tried to over-analyze this. I have now read it ten times. To me, a couple of things stand out.

One is that loneliness is apparent in each verse. Whether it was the lonely nights, the empty parking lot, or nobody near, it is made abundantly clear that the voice is alone. This haunted my thoughts. What was the voice trying to tell me? Alone, I am alone. I get that part, but it seemed like more was trying to creep out. Was it being alone in a crowded subway type of alone?
As in I am surrounded by many people, yet nobody sees me? Or are we talking, I am alone in this world, with nobody to share my dreams?

Secondly it was the glowing. Glowing stars, glowing lights, and a glowing sun. Just what does the glowing represent? Here there is no imply of the word glowing, for it is used outright. So that too bothered me. Again, am I reading too much here. Am I trying to create a metaphor when none exists? I will break it down line by line and see.

12 lines here and I will start at the top:

1-reading this line gives me the impression that there is no other significant other to turn to when the strange dreams awaken the voice.

2-It is a bright night out, for there are many stars visible in the sky. I am not sure if this places the character inside city limits, for I fear viewing that many stars, one would have to be away from some of the other city lights.

3-The reference to concrete and emotional mind bring to thought the metaphor. What here makes the voice connect the two? Have we now traveled to the garage and the cement is cold? Relating this to feelings and emotions from the strange dream that woke us in the first place, are we saying that we are emotionally hardened to life? If so, why?

4- The reference to others here and their activities show us that something out of the normal is happening. The character or voice shouldn't be up at this hour.

5-Here we start a new verse. Have we now walked, or are we driving? We are traveling down memory lane asking questions of the choices in life. Simple enough. We can do that from just about any vantage point.

6-The reference here now to the glowing lights and the position of them lead me to believe the voice is walking at night or driving aimlessly. Insomnia induced thinking. The lights then take on a new meaning. They are the sun of the evening for many.

7- Simple enough here, we are witnessing the weather.

8- Alone again. Or is it still? Has the voice walked, drove by car, or simply using metaphors. Either of the three can apply here.

9-Another new verse here and we begin it with a derivative of depression combined with hope. Leading me to believe that although we are experiencing, what I believe is insomnia,we haven't given up yet. There is enough energy to still hope.

10-The glowing sun, brings to light we have now been out all night. It is early morning and the glowing may be hurting our sleep deprived eyes.

11-Yes, the eyes have been open far too long. What they see as they wander through the night through the memories and choices made, still somehow leaves room for hope. So,,, all is not lost.

12- Heading for home.

So this was my break down of the poem. What I get out of this , and this is purely my interpretation, is this:

Being single, dreams often awake me in the middle of the night when most sane people are sleeping in their beds. This happens often (not mentioned in poem), and when it does, I tend to go for a drive, knowing that sleep will elude me the rest of the night anyway. I often drive to an empty lot or parking lot and glance up at the sky, going back over the paths I have chosen in life, and where I will go from here. As the sun comes up, I head back home, once again able to close my eyes.


*Star*Any editing comments:
I saw nothing to comment on as far as editing goes. This is a well written piece. The part that stumped me for so long, was myself. Trying to complicate it. Trying to see the metaphor. What didn't occur to me for quite some time was that perhaps there wasn't one to see.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
To me the glowing reference in each verse represented a light. A light of comfort. With the light on, you are not alone. You are protected from the darkness. The darkness being depression.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Opening my eyes to see what was really here before me. Even the capital letter at the beginning of each line was trying to create a hidden word for me. I was looking for more hidden messages. They weren't hidden though. I just merely had to open my eyes and read.


*Star*Suggestions:
Keep writing. You write great poetry, and I have enjoyed reading each piece I have come across. Keep up the wonderful work.

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1218
1218
Review of Foggy Revelations  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.0)
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fyn

*Star*Brief Summary:
This is a contest entry with three sides to one event. A cloud filled morning with a clear incident lead to three altercations with the fog.


*Star*Suggestions:
~Paragraph one: The word fog or a deviation of it is over-used in the first paragraph.
Sentence1:*instead of the word very perhaps early would fit more in tune with the stories. It all started one early foggy morning. Then again that makes it sound like it is the beginning to something which occurs over and over, or a tale that goes on for a while. It is mis-leading. Lets look at this again.
It was an early foggy morning..

Sentence 2: totally delete the second sentence. Everything contained within it is repeated again in the third sentence, thus making it not only repetitious but confusing.

~"I did not like the fog. It scared me. I was always afraid of getting lost in the fog it and never finding my way home or getting lost and ending up in some other world that waited on the far side of the fog it.


PARAGRAPH 2:
~a small insertion is needed in the first sentence to let the reader's know that we are still speaking of this early morning incident.
I was not very happythis morning"

~our dog had dug his way out of the doghis kennel.

PARAGRAPH 4:
~around our house. But the fog played around our house, but the fog...

Gary's Story:
~ here I find it unlikely that Gary would turn to Billy and Call him twinners. He is too scared to refer to anything familiar, something more along the line of "hey" , something short and quick.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked how the author took three sides of the story. There is always more than one way to view an event. This was a clever work of art.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
The title. It didn't cut it for me. My alternate idea: Foggy Revelations or Foggy Events. I shoot for the first one though.


*Star*Why I rated this so: This is well written. I would however include a small link at the bottom to the contest so that others can see the limitations put on the work. Is there a word limit and so forth? Also I had a bit of trouble though mainly with the first paragraph.

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1219
1219
Review of seek it2  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hey there my friend, I was trying to link one of my auctions and kept mistakenly linking this item instead. So since I repeatedly linked it, I had to go see what I was linking. The curiosity had me by the throat. Well lo and behold, here is a knick knack shelf containing two items I would love to have, oh wait I see a third *Laugh* but I am sure I already have a $20 bill or at least I did on payday *Laugh* This collage of items is very interesting. I can't tell what the bottle is though. So here is my question, is this a personal picture??? What purpose does this link serve??? Is it a hidden treasure we must find?? So many questions sparked from a picture. Thank you for sharing.

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1220
1220
Review of My hands  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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tc_davis

"This is a review in connection with "Invalid Item."

*Star*Brief Summary:
This is a very physical and emotional poem. The pain is the constant in each verse.

~Verse one: The voice of the poem speaks of washing the hands of emotion while weathering the storms of destruction.

~Verse two: The voice now washes away the physical while remaining alone or lonely.

~Verse three: Sweat and tears are something we give of ourselves. So it is as if the verse is washing away your efforts, your achievements, things you have accomplished.

~Verse four: Secrets and thoughts, something nobody else can take away from us. Yet the voice tries to get rid of these as well.


*Star*Any editing comments:
I could find nothing to comment on as far as editing points.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
It is as if the voice is trying to erase itself, yet as spoken in the last verse, all in vain. For the voice realizes that life must go on. Though secret wishes are to end the life, the voice realizes in the end that this life is normal and it should proceed as the fates and destiny decide.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
In the first verse the voice washes away a crush. So at one point another person was involved with the voice, at least as far as a link in the mind of the voice. In verse two the lonely free air gives us reference that the crush is no longer in alliance with the voice. Giving all of that, this could very well be a poem of depression or re-birth. (just my interpretation)


*Star*Suggestions:
One line in verse three troubled me. The use of the word "Normally" seemed off for the structure of the verse. Perhaps the single word "normal" would fit a little more smooth for the readers.

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1221
1221
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
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Mara ♣ McBain

"This is a reciprocal review on behalf of writetight, whom you were so kind as to have reviewed recently, and is in connection with "Invalid Item."

*Star*Brief Summary:
Ean is learning what it is like having a family to take care of. Out of all his life experiences, nothing has scared him like Erin and Nick seem to. Especially his little Erin.


*Star*Any editing comments:
I did find one contradiction in this piece. In chapter four, even though Rosie is considered "in his emply" it is implied that Ean has a little fun at Annabelle's expense (pounding reference). Yet in chapter seven Rosie is considered off limits due to the "in his emply". This was confusing. I had to go back through the chapters to be sure I hadn't confused the facts, after all it has been a week or two since I had read the first six chapters.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I like the story as it is unfolding. I couldn't say for positive what has captured my attention, perhaps it is the Cinderella, Pretty Woman, like theme that seems to have lured me into the storyline. What ever it is, I am enjoying this adventure.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Stated above as confusion with Rosie.


*Star*Suggestions/Comments:
I found Erin as another name of one of your characters in another writing of yours. Is this a name you are partial to?

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1222
1222
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (4.5)
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KatElulu

*Star*Brief Summary:
A poem based on the rhyming couplet format with a message on growth.


*Star*Suggestions:
This poem consists of two rhyming couplets and a pause. Five lines altogether. An added space between the second and third line, as well as an added space between the third and the fourth line, would add a passage of time for the reader. I feel this would also strengthen the poem.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked the journey this represents. A journey of growth and self discovery. The voice of the poem speaks of journey and improvement of the soul. Also a hint is left that there is somewhere a story of the journey.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
In the beginning, the voice is at the end of a road. Then it travels to the fork. Is it the same fork once visited, or a new fork on a different path? If it is a new fork never viewed, then the end of the line needs changed to read in the road in place of of the road


*Star*Why I rated this so:
I thought this was well written, though I did find a few things that I felt needed some adjustment or clarification in order for me to rate it higher.
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1223
1223
Review of By the Fireside  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Split Infinitive

*Star*Brief Summary:
Eddie runs across something that sends his memory back 20 years. Left to re-analyze summers of youth and a friendship, he is troubled by his actions or lack there of.


*Star*Suggestions:
The last paragraph, when speaking of the remains, it isn't revealed or even hinted at, that the remains are around 20 years old. It seems like more evidence is needed or should be produced to come up with the concluding thoughts of the voice from this piece.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked the descriptives used in the piece. One can easily see the two boys sneaking off to do the deeds mentioned here. The smells of summer and the nights spent outside are great visuals.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
Only the one listed above in the suggestions.


*Star*Why I rated this so:
A well written piece. Though a suggestion was made this piece holds up without any additions or editing. A memory can be sparked from a smell, a word, so many various items that it isn't for me to say what should or shouldn't be inserted here.

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1224
1224
Review of Rupert's Mistake  
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Secret Santa

*Star*Brief Summary:
Gathering his strength on a long drive, Rupert is about to meet his princess whom he met through the internet. A relationship nurtured across the miles through the computer connection is no longer enough. Rupert is about to meet the princess of his dreams.


*Star*Suggestions:
~One small typo toward the bottom of the piece. Instead of the word he, the letter e stands out alone.

~A word count is issued at the bottom leading readers to surmise this may have been written for a contest or from a prompt. If this is the case, it is often helpful to the reviewer to know the limitations of which the author is working with on this piece. A link (if this is the case) at the top or bottom of the short story would be helpful.


*Star*What I liked about this piece:
I liked the way the author portrays and describes Rupert. His human characteristics are viewable through the actions.

~Another part I especially liked is the cliffhanger at the end. A great way to lead a reader into a storyline. Will you then use this to create a novel? It does have the great makings for a good humorous story.


*Star*Areas that I had trouble with:
NONE REALLY

*Star*Why I rated this so:
Well written.
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1225
1225
Review by ~WhoMe???~
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
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bkcompton

*Star*Personal notes:
So you plug and run with out so much as a hello, leaving behind a tempting morsel for me to enjoy. A little background here. When living in Nevada 9 years prior, it was learned we would be moving to Wisconsin. I then spent a year watching every Packer's game that year.Who would live in Cheese Territory and not be a Packer fan? We ended up in Montana. Snow, but no football team. We have never watched a football game since. We turned off Television 4 years ago. This year, I LISTENED to the Packer's final game of the season. I was on pens and needles for every play. Now he retires.

*Star*Comments:
~I had heard that Favre was leaving the beloved team. I hadn't heard that it wasn't quite official yet. So, thank you for the update. As you state, he HAS been a part of the team for 17 years. His name will forever be as much a part of the Packer's team as Lambo field. You do bring up some mighty important questions. Who will be running the show. The media or Favre??? Do you feel a cover up? Isn't the fact that he has played so well for this long enough to earn him a quiet retirement?

This is a great entry that is thought provoking and has me wondering all the same. Perhaps I need to check the newsbroadcasts later today to find out what exactly the news coverage will uncover!


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